|
Replies: 69
| visibility 1447
|
Paw Master [16338]
TigerPulse: 98%
51
Posts: 18820
Joined: 2009
|
Would it be difficult for you to accept your son if he
Apr 19, 2023, 9:17 AM
|
|
1: transitioned during high school to a she?
2: became a homosexual
Or would that love for him overcome caring what other people thought of how you raised him?
|
|
|
|
 |
Heisman Winner [80240]
TigerPulse: 100%
62
Posts: 28137
Joined: 2014
|
Listen, I am upfront with my kids, you will be flat-out
12
12
Apr 19, 2023, 9:20 AM
|
|
disowned if you cheer for anything Gamecock-related, that includes Sumter High, Jacksonville State, and the two-digit IQ grads of a certain lower-class state school
|
|
|
|
|
|
Ultimate Clemson Legend [108402]
TigerPulse: 100%
64
Posts: 70362
Joined: 2002
|
My dad sat me down when I applied to USC as a last resort
1
Apr 19, 2023, 9:22 AM
|
|
college. He flat out told me if I went there, he would not disown me, but my mother would be writing any tuition checks.
|
|
|
|
|
|
TigerNet Icon [152264]
TigerPulse: 100%
68
Posts: 68070
Joined: 2000
|
|
|
|
|
|
All-Time Great [90469]
TigerPulse: 100%
63
Posts: 62198
Joined: 2004
|
junior colleges are fun***
Apr 19, 2023, 11:05 AM
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Oculus Spirit [42284]
TigerPulse: 100%
57
Posts: 21500
Joined: 2022
|
Hey. We like our little Citadel buddy.***
Apr 19, 2023, 11:27 AM
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Ultimate Clemson Legend [108402]
TigerPulse: 100%
64
Posts: 70362
Joined: 2002
|
Some things in this world are unconditional***
Apr 19, 2023, 9:20 AM
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
All-In [34487]
TigerPulse: 100%
56
Posts: 13513
Joined: 2019
|
No, I know a couple of older fellas who are
7
7
Apr 19, 2023, 9:22 AM
|
|
dealing with the same thing. And they handle it like men and support their kids regardless of their personal beliefs.
It took my dad a little while to get used to the fact that my brother is a polesmoker, but he's a man and did it. And now they're closer than ever.
People who disown their kids or try to dictate their love and support based on their own biases are weak-minded, weak-willed and self-centered.
|
|
|
|
|
|
Ultimate Tiger [33249]
TigerPulse: 100%
56
Posts: 15113
Joined: 2011
|
So - how close ? Any pictures ?
Apr 19, 2023, 9:35 AM
|
|
Curious,
Tickle_It
|
|
|
|
|
|
Heisman Winner [86941]
TigerPulse: 100%
62
Posts: 26916
Joined: 2012
|
Incest jokes Mcluvins thing***
Apr 19, 2023, 11:28 AM
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
TigerNet Icon [152264]
TigerPulse: 100%
68
Posts: 68070
Joined: 2000
|
|
|
|
|
|
Orange Immortal [65180]
TigerPulse: 100%
60
Posts: 22741
Joined: 2004
|
|
|
|
|
|
Oculus Spirit [42284]
TigerPulse: 100%
57
Posts: 21500
Joined: 2022
|
I don't know.
2
Apr 19, 2023, 9:23 AM
|
|
Are you an awful parent?
|
|
|
|
|
|
Paw Master [16338]
TigerPulse: 98%
51
Posts: 18820
Joined: 2009
|
I probably care too much of what others think of me.
1
Apr 19, 2023, 9:32 AM
|
|
I think I'd have a lot of shame that I did something wrong to turn my kid into a "weirdo".
I think it would likely, unfortunately, affect my relationship with him. As a Christian, it would be difficult for me to accept that as well. Obviously, I would still love him, but I'm not sure I could support him or truly accept his choice.
Just a random thought I had this morning.
|
|
|
|
|
|
Oculus Spirit [42284]
TigerPulse: 100%
57
Posts: 21500
Joined: 2022
|
As a Christian, I'll pray for your heart.***
1
Apr 19, 2023, 9:39 AM
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Paw Master [16338]
TigerPulse: 98%
51
Posts: 18820
Joined: 2009
|
It needs it. That's for sure.***
1
Apr 19, 2023, 9:41 AM
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Tiger Titan [50414]
TigerPulse: 100%
58
Posts: 39153
Joined: 1998
|
|
|
|
|
|
Heisman Winner [86941]
TigerPulse: 100%
62
Posts: 26916
Joined: 2012
|
Yeah, if you can't love them for who they are, the decent
1
Apr 19, 2023, 11:33 AM
|
|
people will think you're not decent.
|
|
|
|
|
|
All-Time Great [90469]
TigerPulse: 100%
63
Posts: 62198
Joined: 2004
|
|
|
|
|
|
All-In [34487]
TigerPulse: 100%
56
Posts: 13513
Joined: 2019
|
Re: Your kid can still be a weirdo without being ghey
4
Apr 19, 2023, 11:13 AM
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
TigerNet Legend [147167]
TigerPulse: 100%
67
Posts: 94640
Joined: 1998
|
|
|
|
|
|
Clemson Sports Icon [59356]
TigerPulse: 100%
59
Posts: 32426
Joined: 2002
|
I, for one, would perform an honor killing.***
7
7
Apr 19, 2023, 9:30 AM
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Valley Legend [12694]
TigerPulse: 100%
47
Posts: 10393
Joined: 2002
|
Lutz. Sounds like you don't have kids.***
Apr 19, 2023, 9:31 AM
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Oculus Spirit [41984]
TigerPulse: 100%
57
Posts: 14667
Joined: 2013
|
"I AM PROUD OF MY GAY SON"
8
8
Apr 19, 2023, 9:32 AM
|
|
I see old people at Pride parades with signs and stuff that say things like that.
And I think that's an odd thing to be proud of ... cuz, it's not like an achievement you work hard towards to be gay or anything like that ...
I just have a hard time believing 50-60 year old men are standing around the office saying, "Hey Bill, you know my son, we're so proud of him. You know, Little Johnny graduated from Harvard. First in his class. And now he's articling over at the big fancy law firm here in town ....
... oh yeah, and he loves cockk"
|
|
|
|
|
|
All-In [34487]
TigerPulse: 100%
56
Posts: 13513
Joined: 2019
|
RIP NORM***
4
Apr 19, 2023, 9:33 AM
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Clemson Sports Icon [59356]
TigerPulse: 100%
59
Posts: 32426
Joined: 2002
|
|
|
|
|
|
Ultimate Clemson Legend [103217]
TigerPulse: 100%
64
Posts: 29139
Joined: 2014
|
This reminds me of that episode from the Man Show
2
Apr 19, 2023, 9:33 AM
|
|
Dad, can I have a popsicle? NO!
|
|
|
|
|
|
TigerNet Champion [117557]
TigerPulse: 100%
65
Posts: 69045
Joined: 2002
|
Not 100% sure my Dad ever fully accepted
8
8
Apr 19, 2023, 9:34 AM
|
|
my brother's choice. He was upset at first, then just kind of ignored it. It was as much acceptance as we would have ever gotten from him. He just pretended my brother wasn't ever in any relationship with anyone. But they still got along and my brother took care of him for the last couple years of my Dad's life.
It would just be so much easier to be accepting and to get rid of the notion that someone being gay "wasn't raised right" because that couldn't be farther from the truth. Also, who gives a shid what other people think?
|
|
|
|
|
|
Paw Master [16338]
TigerPulse: 98%
51
Posts: 18820
Joined: 2009
|
I think it's pretty difficult for most men to not
1
Apr 19, 2023, 9:37 AM
|
|
care what others think. Totally agree with you, but I think it would be a difficult situation to just fully accept.
|
|
|
|
|
|
All-Time Great [90469]
TigerPulse: 100%
63
Posts: 62198
Joined: 2004
|
What? Hard for men to NOT care what others think?***
Apr 19, 2023, 11:30 AM
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
TigerNet Icon [152264]
TigerPulse: 100%
68
Posts: 68070
Joined: 2000
|
That's purely a symptom of the two generations.
3
Apr 19, 2023, 9:48 AM
[ in reply to Not 100% sure my Dad ever fully accepted ] |
|
No baby boomers were gay (they were, just not openly). Ours was the first generation where it became OK to be openly gay, and our parents had to figure out how to deal with it, whether to accept it, how to talk about it (or not talk about it), and everything else.
Our generation? If a parent has a problem with it, that's on him/her.
|
|
|
|
|
|
Orange Immortal [65574]
TigerPulse: 100%
60
Posts: 49136
Joined: 2000
|
Similar situation here.
8
8
Apr 19, 2023, 11:45 AM
[ in reply to Not 100% sure my Dad ever fully accepted ] |
|
My older brother is gay. Daddy was southern baptist WW2 vet, very much an old-school conservative. He loved my brother with all of his heart, but my brother was a teenager in the mid-late 1960s, and was very much a part of the hippie, anti-establishment culture, so he and our Daddy clashed on just about every level. So, when my brother first mentioned something about being gay when he was 15-16 years old, they took him to a psychiatrist, as at that time, homosexuality was still listed as a mental disorder. By the time he finished college, he was openly gay and lived with his boyfriend. My parents accepted it, and brother and BF even vacationed with us and ate Sunday dinners with us. But while Daddy accepted it on some level, to keep the peace, he never embraced it, or approved of it. I think they thought he would eventually come to his senses and "stop behaving that way".
My father took his own life at age 83 due to a medical daignosis that meant that his remaining years would be filled with untreatable pain and no quality of life. When I found him, there was a bible, where we couldn't miss it on the table, opened to the passage about the sin of homosexuality.
So the whole issue is very personal for me. Life doesn't need to be any harder than it already is, for anybody.
|
|
|
|
|
|
Oculus Spirit [42284]
TigerPulse: 100%
57
Posts: 21500
Joined: 2022
|
This is one of those situations where it is really hard to
4
Apr 19, 2023, 12:12 PM
|
|
judge retroactively. I can't say with a straight face (pun gratuitously intended for levity) that I would be near as much of an ally to the gay community as I am today if I had come up a generation or two behind. We hope that we would, but that's just not the case; we being creatures of our environment (and one thing that the "woke" scolds miss when trying to apply today's values to the innocuous "bigotry" of even a decade ago).
So, props to your late father for trying to do as much as he could to be accepting and loving. He did more than most from his generation. And serious props to your brother for the courage to being himself when it was outright dangerous for him.
I think a big turning point for me in my evolution from gay basher to advocate was watching a good friend struggle with his identity, and the change in him after he finally accepted it and came out. He went from gloomy curmudgeon to happy and optimistic. It was then that I understood the importance of being true to oneself, and advocating for a society that allowed people to safely be who they were. People think that "choosing to be gay" some sort of a hedonistic choice...as if choosing a path that has higher rates of suicide and social abuse is a preferable one. On the other side, it also makes it completely sick to watch performative wokesters talk about how they "hope" their kids are gay because of X stupid reasons.
All I want is for my kid to be happy.
|
|
|
|
|
|
Orange Immortal [65574]
TigerPulse: 100%
60
Posts: 49136
Joined: 2000
|
Exactly. My father was a great father who did the best he
2
Apr 19, 2023, 12:51 PM
|
|
could, as best as he knew how. I'm not sure my brother has ever come to terms with that, as the hurt was pretty bad. Forgiveness is for the benefit of the forgiver, however, and a little understanding goes a long way.
People need to understand that. Owning slaves was never "right" or justifiable, however, when it comes to slavery, for instance, it's ridiculous to apply the same judgement standards to Thomas Jefferson or George Washington as we apply to everyone today. It's very possible, and I'd say very important, to realize that in spite of their wrong beliefs which unfortunately impacted a lot of people, they were still great men worthy of honor and respect; at least their ideas and accomplishments are, and can't be dismissed because of slavery. In 1942 when my father was in England fighting a war, almost EVERYBODY thought queers were twisted perverts who either needed a pshychiatrist or a good old fashioned ### kicking. I can't hold it against my Daddy because he thought that too, especially when the bible reinforced it.
|
|
|
|
|
|
TigerNet Immortal [176589]
TigerPulse: 100%
69
Posts: 72576
Joined: 2013
|
Good lawd. Must’ve missed this first go-round.
2
Apr 19, 2023, 7:14 PM
[ in reply to Similar situation here. ] |
|
Thats heeeeeaaavy, brother.
|
|
|
|
|
|
Oculus Spirit [41984]
TigerPulse: 100%
57
Posts: 14667
Joined: 2013
|
Re: Would it be difficult for you to accept your son if he
Apr 19, 2023, 9:38 AM
|
|
.
|
|
|
|
|
|
Ultimate Clemson Legend [103217]
TigerPulse: 100%
64
Posts: 29139
Joined: 2014
|
I remember when I told my Papa I was dating a
5
5
Apr 19, 2023, 9:47 AM
|
|
Chinese. That may have been the best laugh he had before he died.
|
|
|
|
|
|
TigerNet Icon [152264]
TigerPulse: 100%
68
Posts: 68070
Joined: 2000
|
I believe "Oriental" is the proper nomenclature, dude.***
7
7
Apr 19, 2023, 9:51 AM
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
TigerNet Immortal [176589]
TigerPulse: 100%
69
Posts: 72576
Joined: 2013
|
yeah, well that's just your slant on it.***
8
8
Apr 19, 2023, 9:53 AM
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Ultimate Clemson Legend [103217]
TigerPulse: 100%
64
Posts: 29139
Joined: 2014
|
|
|
|
|
|
TigerNet Icon [152264]
TigerPulse: 100%
68
Posts: 68070
Joined: 2000
|
No, stupid! We Laotian! It's a landlocked country in
6
6
Apr 19, 2023, 9:56 AM
|
|
southeast Asia, OK?
|
|
|
|
|
|
Oculus Spirit [39590]
TigerPulse: 100%
57
Posts: 12966
Joined: 2015
|
……. So are you Chinese or Japanese?***
2
Apr 19, 2023, 10:56 AM
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Oculus Spirit [42284]
TigerPulse: 100%
57
Posts: 21500
Joined: 2022
|
This happens.
Apr 19, 2023, 11:29 AM
|
|
I have a Japanese friend. She's been in the U.S. so long she has a southern accent. Had someone ask her this at a gas station in high school.
|
|
|
|
|
|
Top TigerNet [32944]
TigerPulse: 100%
55
Posts: 16694
Joined: 2014
|
|
|
|
|
|
Orange Immortal [65180]
TigerPulse: 100%
60
Posts: 22741
Joined: 2004
|
|
|
|
|
|
Ultimate Tiger [37770]
TigerPulse: 100%
56
Posts: 43602
Joined: 2001
|
Why are all these homos sucking my ####?***
7
7
Apr 19, 2023, 9:52 AM
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
All-Time Great [90469]
TigerPulse: 100%
63
Posts: 62198
Joined: 2004
|
They put that on tshirts for freshman at the Citadel, don't
2
Apr 19, 2023, 11:06 AM
|
|
they?"
|
|
|
|
|
|
TigerNet Immortal [176589]
TigerPulse: 100%
69
Posts: 72576
Joined: 2013
|
Re: Would it be difficult for you to accept your son if he
10
10
Apr 19, 2023, 9:52 AM
|
|
1: transitioned during high school to a she?
There would be nothing to accept. I'd get him the mental health care that he was clearly crying out for.
2: became a homosexual
My understanding from years of progressive conditioning is that one does not "become" a homosexual, rather they're born that way. I'd accept it, still love him, and blame myself for not going out in the yard and throwing the football with him a little more when he was young.
|
|
|
|
|
|
Top TigerNet [30181]
TigerPulse: 100%
55
Posts: 11627
Joined: 2011
|
seconded
1
Apr 19, 2023, 10:22 AM
|
|
glad I read your response, b/c this is my view as well. Pretty much verbatim.
I also think we had some good discussions....perhaps a thread I created on politics, can't remember....about the prevalence / growth of the homosexual community and how that contradicts, in my opinion, to evolutionary traits of a species. Someone, a jounger iirc, posted the current psychological interpretation of homosexuality is in fact a spectrum. They then posited that due to the more widespread (muthafuckingpanic) acceptance of homosexuality, this has created an avenue for more people to come out.
Very rough paraphrasing, but the topic is too popular to search, but I'll try to find it. I think it was actually CT15 or 19B...can't remember though.
Idk...I bought it at the time. Still makes decent enough sense to me.
|
|
|
|
|
|
Top TigerNet [30181]
TigerPulse: 100%
55
Posts: 11627
Joined: 2011
|
Found it
1
Apr 19, 2023, 10:28 AM
|
|
I did create it haha
and CT15 brought up the spectrum theory/analysis
Not sure that explains the phenomenon in the growth, from my vantage point, but hey, we got people living well past when they're supposed to due to advances in modern medicine. Humans sure can #### up the evolutionary pathways of a species...
https://www.tigernet.com/clemson-forum/message/homosexuality-and-evolution-29608810
|
|
|
|
|
|
Tiger Titan [48664]
TigerPulse: 100%
58
Posts: 43379
Joined: 1998
|
Re: seconded
1
Apr 19, 2023, 10:32 AM
[ in reply to seconded ] |
|
Yeah, it's not some widespread "There's more gay people!" They've always been there; they were just too scared for centuries to come out about it.
|
|
|
|
|
|
Ultimate Tiger [37770]
TigerPulse: 100%
56
Posts: 43602
Joined: 2001
|
|
|
|
|
|
All-In [26968]
TigerPulse: 96%
54
Posts: 44815
Joined: 2010
|
What does "accept" mean?***
Apr 19, 2023, 10:17 AM
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
TigerNet Icon [152264]
TigerPulse: 100%
68
Posts: 68070
Joined: 2000
|
Well, I could be wrong, but I believe Accept is an
6
6
Apr 19, 2023, 10:23 AM
|
|
old, old wooden ship that was used during the Civil War era.
|
|
|
|
|
|
Orange Immortal [64047]
TigerPulse: 100%
60
Posts: 44050
Joined: 1998
|
German metal band led by Udo Dirkschneider
2
Apr 19, 2023, 10:29 AM
|
|
whose biggest hit is ironically, the homo-erotic anthem "Balls to the Wall"
https://youtu.be/B_3TlrZLpQ0
|
|
|
|
|
|
Oculus Spirit [41984]
TigerPulse: 100%
57
Posts: 14667
Joined: 2013
|
|
|
|
|
|
Clemson Sports Icon [59356]
TigerPulse: 100%
59
Posts: 32426
Joined: 2002
|
|
|
|
|
|
Orange Immortal [65180]
TigerPulse: 100%
60
Posts: 22741
Joined: 2004
|
|
|
|
|
|
Ultimate Clemson Legend [103217]
TigerPulse: 100%
64
Posts: 29139
Joined: 2014
|
Not sure if you tagged me for BOAISY
1
Apr 19, 2023, 11:02 AM
|
|
Or for incest
Or BOTH.
|
|
|
|
|
|
Orange Immortal [65574]
TigerPulse: 100%
60
Posts: 49136
Joined: 2000
|
Not difficult for me to accept, but difficult to manage and
4
Apr 19, 2023, 10:25 AM
|
|
deal with because I know it would be difficult for them. It would be downright heartbreaking in that sense. Having said that, I would love and support a child unconditionally in either circumstance.
|
|
|
|
|
|
Orange Immortal [65574]
TigerPulse: 100%
60
Posts: 49136
Joined: 2000
|
I read Obed's poast, and I think I should expound on my
2
Apr 19, 2023, 11:25 AM
|
|
poast.
If my HS aged child wanted to transition, I would definitely get them in counseling, and I would probably encourage them to hold off on any permanent, life-changing decisions like that until they were much older. I raised two daughters, and we didn't go through that, but went through some tough times all the same, and THEY will tell you that what they wanted then is not what they now want for the rest of their lives. It's ridiculous for 14-18 yr olds to make such life altering decisions.
Having said that, I would still love and support them through it all.
|
|
|
|
|
|
All-Time Great [90469]
TigerPulse: 100%
63
Posts: 62198
Joined: 2004
|
I would have trouble accepting that
2
Apr 19, 2023, 10:43 AM
|
|
Having a son in high school would take a while to get over.
|
|
|
|
|
|
Orange Immortal [65180]
TigerPulse: 100%
60
Posts: 22741
Joined: 2004
|
I agree with OBED
2
Apr 19, 2023, 10:47 AM
|
|
but I'd rather not think about it, and just cross that bridge if/when I (hopefully don't) have to.
|
|
|
|
|
|
TigerNet Icon [152264]
TigerPulse: 100%
68
Posts: 68070
Joined: 2000
|
I don't think that's what they meant by "rainbow bridge".***
3
Apr 19, 2023, 10:58 AM
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Orange Immortal [65180]
TigerPulse: 100%
60
Posts: 22741
Joined: 2004
|
nice
1
Apr 19, 2023, 11:04 AM
|
|
and if that day every comes, I may be crossing the rainbow bridge (from heart attack)
probably not, though. And at age 12, I'm pretty dang sure he has made his decision.
|
|
|
|
|
|
Top TigerNet [30793]
TigerPulse: 100%
55
Posts: 62760
Joined: 1999
|
was lefthanded?***
Apr 19, 2023, 11:55 AM
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Top TigerNet [32944]
TigerPulse: 100%
55
Posts: 16694
Joined: 2014
|
Re: Would it be difficult for you to accept your son if he
Apr 19, 2023, 12:31 PM
|
|
Wouldn't that make they a lesbian? Would they be gay or straight at that point?
|
|
|
|
|
|
Orange Immortal [64746]
TigerPulse: 100%
60
Posts: 38534
Joined: 1998
|
|
|
|
|
|
Tiger Titan [50414]
TigerPulse: 100%
58
Posts: 39153
Joined: 1998
|
I don't equate the two...
3
Apr 19, 2023, 1:26 PM
|
|
I'm still not sure where the transgender thing is going to wind up. I beleive there are people with genuine feelings that we should listen to and support. I beleive there are people who are totally full of #### and I'm pretty sure will someday write a gotcha book about "their time as a woman" particularly that swimmer who won all the medals in the Northeast. I think that social media has made our traditional isolated 500 people to a group society into one big ### group of billions, and that means the influence of and exposure to ideas is amplified. And with tons of kids wondering why they don't fit in or aren't liked in their current form, it's easy to try and find a niche where you can be accepted.
So if my son said he thought he was transgendered, I'd love and support him with open counseling and try and decide if he was serious.
I have a son who is 14. He's a good looking kid, a model, an actor, a singer and when you drop his ### off at a party, every one of the girls comes running to hang/flirt with him. If you listen to them talk, they are hoping he's straight but hasn't met the right girl. But he's just not into girls. He doesn't date guys, but he's told us for the last couple of years that he might be gay. But I'll support him either way.
|
|
|
|
|
|
All-In [10682]
TigerPulse: 100%
45
|
I'm more confused than Joe Biden
1
Apr 19, 2023, 8:13 PM
|
|
trying to pick an ice cream or Trump trying to find a tax break.
1. If he becomes a she and then a hormo, is he still straight because he likes wimmens?
2. If he becomes a she who goes to Wake Forest for the Deacs, does that make him, her, they gay?
Never really thought about it, because I have three daughters. I'll always remember when the baby told me she was a thespian. I had two questions.
"What took you so long to tell me?" (the old man aint so dumb)
"Are you a good person?" (I knew the answer to that question for a long time)
laugh, love and don't take yourself too seriously. God, Allah or the Martians will sort it all out in the end.
|
|
|
|
|
|
Replies: 69
| visibility 1447
|
|
|
50
