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Ring of Honor [23429]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Snails Pace Monday...maybe a chuckle will help...Dad-ish style
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May 19, 2025, 8:01 AM
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Dreary, wet start to the day here in the ATL...one cup of coffee won't cut it today!
OK...here goes:
What do you call a moose with no name?
AnonyMoose. (Let's all groan together...and hope for better!)
This morning I learned (over coffee, I might add) that ostriches often walk around and forget where they're going.
Clearly, I've found my spirit animal! 
Wife: I'm having heart surgery
Husband: I know.
Wife: I love you!
Husband: I love you much more!
Awakening after her surgery, only her father was next to her. "Where's my husband?"
Father: "You don't know who gave you the heart?" Wife starts crying...
Father: "I'm kidding...he just went to the restroom!" (Bold...or stupid?)
Slap this day silly, Tiger Nation! Live your standard!
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Ultimate Tiger [34608]
TigerPulse: 100%
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I asked my dog what's two minus two. He said nothing.
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May 19, 2025, 8:22 AM
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I was going to buy a book on procrastination, but I keep putting it off.
What rock group has four men who don't sing? Mount Rushmore.
If you see a crime at an Apple store, are you an iWitness?
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Dynasty Maker [3494]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Re: Snails Pace Monday...maybe a chuckle will help...Dad-ish style
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May 19, 2025, 8:32 AM
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How do you identify a Dogwood tree? by its bark! :0)
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TigerNet Elite [74222]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Re: Snails Pace Monday...maybe a chuckle will help...Dad-ish style
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May 19, 2025, 8:34 AM
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A family is at the dinner table. The son asks the father, “Dad, how many kinds of tatas are there?” The father, surprised, answers, “Well, son, a woman goes through three phases. In her 20s, a woman’s breasts are like melons, round and firm. In her 30s and 40s, they are like pears, still nice, hanging a bit. After 50, they are like onions.” “Onions?” the son asks. “Yes. You see them and they make you cry.” This infuriated his wife and daughter. The daughter asks, “Mom, how many different kinds of willies are there?” The mother smiles and says, “Well, dear, a man goes through three phases also. In his 20s, his willy is like an oak tree, mighty and hard. In his 30s and 40s, it’s like a birch, flexible but reliable. After his 50s, it’s like a Christmas tree.” “A Christmas tree?” the daughter asks. “Yes, dead from the root up and the balls are just for decoration.”
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Ultimate Clemson Legend [102116]
TigerPulse: 100%
64
Posts: 26336
Joined: 2006
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lol +1***
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May 19, 2025, 8:42 AM
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Oculus Spirit [40371]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Re: Snails Pace Monday...maybe a chuckle will help...Dad-ish style
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May 19, 2025, 8:51 AM
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The average human walks 900 miles per year and drinks 22 gallons of beer.
That means, the average human gets 41 miles per gallon…not bad!!
(Some of us TNetters are not ‘average’ with either stat!!)
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Dynasty Maker [3494]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Re: Snails Pace Monday...maybe a chuckle will help...Dad-ish style
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May 19, 2025, 10:13 AM
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I haven't had any beer in about five years. Someone has been taking my portion, apparently!
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Ultimate Tiger [34651]
TigerPulse: 100%
56
Posts: 14400
Joined: 2014
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Re: Snails Pace Monday...maybe a chuckle will help...Dad-ish style
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May 19, 2025, 9:34 AM
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How are the movies Titanic and the Sixth Sense alike?
Icy dead people.
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Redshirt [95]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Re: Snails Pace Monday...maybe a chuckle will help...Dad-ish style
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May 19, 2025, 10:48 AM
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I gotta tell ya, I look forward to these every day!
Thanks for taking the time.
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Ring of Honor [21718]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Re: Snails Pace Monday...maybe a chuckle will help...Dad-ish style
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May 19, 2025, 1:23 PM
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Yeah no matter how bad a day can be, you can always look at this thread for a smile 😊
Thanks guys!
GO TIGERS!!!
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