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Team Captain [493]
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Getting Married...
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Jan 19, 2023, 12:21 PM
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Trying to plan honeymoon (I'm the groom). Fiance' and future wife wants to go out of the country for an all-inclusive sort of experience. Obviously this type of trip is going to be a pretty penny (my savings will be drained). So, any of you old timers have any advice on how to break it to my lady that I can't afford such things? I am obviously going to try to still create a special trip, but I don't believe putting myself in financial ruin is necessarily the best route as newly weds.
I know this kind of thing probably is best not posted on the interwebs, but I don't exactly know how to proceed. Also it should be noted that my family is not in a position to aid me financially in this endeavor.
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Game Day Hero [4279]
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Re: Getting Married...
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Jan 19, 2023, 12:22 PM
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Why?
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National Champion [7139]
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Re: Getting Married...
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Jan 19, 2023, 12:25 PM
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Tell her you can not afford it. If she takes it wrong, then you saved yourself from a marriage of trying to keep a woman happy despite the financial hardships it brings.
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Orange Blooded [2266]
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THIS. Been divorced for 10 years now and this....
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Jan 19, 2023, 2:44 PM
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is the best advice you can get. Don't allow yourself to think with the wrong brain either (easily my biggest mistake).
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National Champion [7139]
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Re: THIS. Been divorced for 10 years now and this....
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Jan 20, 2023, 9:00 AM
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Know what you mean. My son was dating a girl whose Daddy always gave her everything she wanted. He was not rich, but he lived like he was. She was used to getting everything she wanted when she wanted it. I sabotaged that relationship right quick like.
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All-In [10460]
TigerPulse: 100%
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You like hiking and the outdoors?
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Jan 19, 2023, 12:29 PM
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Go to New Hampshire. My wife and I honeymooned there a few years back. There are some great Air B&B rentals up there - all types. It's not all-inclusive, but it's all-relaxing. Make your own breakfasts (or don't, if you're in the anti-breakfast crowd) or lunches or suppers. Loads of great places to eat for all different budgets. Some of the best hiking I've ever seen. Your biggest expenses will be the air travel (Charlotte - Boston and then a rental car up to NH) and the lodging, but it's gorgeous up there in the White Mountains. Look around N Conway and further north. We stayed in the Gorham/Randolph area. Relaxing, beautiful, fun, romantic, active - it has it all.
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Clemson Conqueror [11397]
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If going to New Hampshire, don't assume you have to fly to Boston
Jan 19, 2023, 8:26 PM
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Several years ago, I got a direct flight from CLT to Manchester, NH...it was great, kinda like GSP!
And right up the coast of Maine, I had some great lobster...very inexpensive!
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Ultimate Clemson Legend [101241]
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My advice is to be upfront and talk to her about it. If you
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Jan 19, 2023, 12:33 PM
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both can't communicate and discuss it now then you may want to hold off on the wedding bells. There will be far more difficult things that you both will have to communicate in a marriage. Good luck.
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Tiger Spirit [9341]
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Re: My advice is to be upfront and talk to her about it. If you
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Jan 19, 2023, 12:36 PM
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This ^^ x2
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Orange Blooded [4083]
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110%er [3722]
TigerPulse: 100%
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I will donate my coins also!***
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Jan 19, 2023, 1:23 PM
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Orange Immortal [66906]
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All-TigerNet [5643]
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I got married 25 years ago, so my perspective is probably
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Jan 19, 2023, 12:34 PM
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Irrelevant today. But, we went to St Thomas for a week at all inclusive resort. It wasn’t super expensive, and included stuff like a sunset cruise. It was a good time, and was a retreat from the craziness of the wedding. You (should) only get married once, so spend the money, and enjoy the memories.
Good luck!
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TigerNet Elite [69791]
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Thirty years ago for me...
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Jan 19, 2023, 12:48 PM
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My wife and I honeymooned at the all inclusive Sandals Dunn's River resort in Ocho Rios, Jamaica. It was pretty pricey but we had an absolute blast. One word of advise, spend less money on a luxury room, go with a standard room, and extend your stay a couple of days. You'll spend very little time in the room anyway.
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Orange Blooded [2481]
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Married 30 years ago and have the opposite opinion
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Jan 19, 2023, 3:43 PM
[ in reply to I got married 25 years ago, so my perspective is probably ] |
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You will still be married no matter where you spend those first few nights. Financial hardships are the cause of many marital problems - most I believe. Wait and go in a few years when money is better. My wife and I waited 20 years to take trips to Bahamas, Ireland etc when we could afford (after cars and houses were paid for).
Just my 2 cents.
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Game Day Hero [4202]
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Get finances discussed before marriage
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Jan 19, 2023, 12:36 PM
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Money or lack thereof is the major cause of divorce. If you two can't come to agreement on this there is almost certainly trouble in the future. Been there done that.
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TigerNet Icon [152682]
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110%er [3884]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Re: Leave a copy of this laying around…
Jan 19, 2023, 2:51 PM
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???
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TigerNet Elite [69791]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Is the fiance' and future wife the same person?
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Jan 19, 2023, 12:40 PM
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Regardless, you have some to the right place because if there is one thing this forum has, it's opinions and A LOT of them, and posters don't mind sharing them. That said, here's mine. Have the two of you created a written wedding budget? If not, be sure to do that NOW. Reflect the total amount of money that has been allocated for the wedding and all the corresponding costs/expenses. It can be very eye opening, so be sure to review it with her/him at least weekly and agree that you're not going to exceed the amount you've allocated. If you want to spend more on a honeymoon, then you have to reduce the amounts budgeted elsewhere (e.g., on the wedding dress, the flowers, the caterer, the DJ/band, the alcohol, the venue, the rehearsal dinner, the photographer/videographer, etc.). Also, there's no rule that dictates you have to honeymoon right after the wedding. Of course you'll want to take a few days and go somewhere, but choose something local, save your money, and take amore extravagant trip in a year or so.
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Team Captain [493]
TigerPulse: 82%
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Re: Is the fiance' and future wife the same person?
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Jan 19, 2023, 12:47 PM
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Yes, we are slated to get married in September of this year. Her parents are paying for our wedding, thus I have been left (as is tradition) to foot the bill for the honeymoon. I have several great alternative options put together in lieu of a luxurious out of country stay. I just fear that my ideas will come up somewhat short when compared with our wedding. However, I guess there is only one way to find out.
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TigerNet Elite [69791]
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Is the honeymoon destination a surprise?
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Jan 19, 2023, 12:54 PM
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If not, the two of you should be discussing it.
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Team Captain [493]
TigerPulse: 82%
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Re: Is the honeymoon destination a surprise?
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Jan 19, 2023, 1:13 PM
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I have been tasked with planning it. To the degree of surprise, I'm not so sure. I think she wanted it to be more of a surprise; however, I will obviously have to consult with her being that we will not be getting passports like she may have originally thought. My conversation with her shall at least be interesting either way.
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TigerNet Elite [69791]
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Use the written budget to initiate that dialogue...
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Jan 19, 2023, 1:32 PM
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Hopefully your wife-to-be is a smart cookie and will be able to see for herself that if she wants a more extravagant honeymoon, she'll need to cut costs in other areas or ask Mommy and Daddy for more money.
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Tiger Titan [50706]
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Maybe you can talk to her parents about your
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Jan 19, 2023, 2:18 PM
[ in reply to Re: Is the fiance' and future wife the same person? ] |
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financial concerns, reiterating that you take your job as provider seriously, and ask if they are open to scaling back some on the wedding and donating the difference toward your honeymoon budget?
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110%er [3843]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Ultimate Clemson Legend [100954]
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Hitch a ride on an inexpensive cruise ship for Bahama's
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Jan 19, 2023, 12:49 PM
[ in reply to Is the fiance' and future wife the same person? ] |
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and use ship for honeymooning, walking, breakfast in bed brought to your door by waiter, dancing in ball room, taking time off ship to shop or rent scooter to tour area, relax at one of their bars/restaurants AND take nice showers or tubbies together with champagne & bubbles.
Good luck & congrats!
GoTiGERS~
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Campus Hero [14002]
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pleade the future.
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Jan 19, 2023, 12:51 PM
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Be honest and save money for the future (house, future trips, whatever.) Go somewhere in the US you both have never been too. We have plenty of 'foreign' sites to see just a drive away!
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CU Medallion [18217]
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Re: Getting Married...
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Jan 19, 2023, 12:53 PM
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Look into going on a cruise leaving from the port of Charleston or down in Florida.
All-inclusive resorts are much more expensive and you have to find a way to fly there as well. Driving to a cruise terminal is far cheaper, boats travel to different destinations for you while you sleep, and you can make your cruise vacation as active or as restful as you please.
Look for a deal and make it happen, Cap’n.
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Orange Elite [5354]
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Paw Warrior [4641]
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Re: Getting Married...
Jan 19, 2023, 3:56 PM
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"Sorry I'm late..."
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TigerNet Immortal [172623]
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Though position to be in. Talk with her and be honest.
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Jan 19, 2023, 12:57 PM
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There are great places here in the good ole US of A. Ocracoke Island is great. Grand Canyon, Yellowstone, etc. A lot of romantic and beautiful places.
I honestly wish you the best of luck and hope things work out for you two.
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Orange Elite [5570]
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Re: Getting Married...
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Jan 19, 2023, 12:57 PM
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If she had a clue you would not have to even discuss it. Wait a year and then take her to Italy or Spain. Trust me grasshopper
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Heisman Winner [86941]
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First of all, we're going to need pigs of your future wife
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Jan 19, 2023, 12:57 PM
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second of all, do you really have a bigwilly?
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Hall of Famer [8824]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Future wife would be happier if handle was BigwallyT***
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Jan 19, 2023, 4:07 PM
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Paw Warrior [4641]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Re: Future wife would be happier if handle was BigwallyT***
Jan 19, 2023, 8:19 PM
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when pigs fly?
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All-TigerNet [5706]
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Look, you are getting married and you are going to be broke anyway
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Jan 19, 2023, 1:02 PM
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Save your self the heart ache and take her on the honeymoon she wants.
You won’t look back on your death bed and say “I wish I didn’t take that trip”
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Ultimate Tiger [33248]
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No - he won't - but he WILL look back in 3 to 7 years and
Jan 19, 2023, 2:22 PM
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will say - I should have realized that there is no making this chick happy when I couldn't even get the honeymoon right, in her eyes.
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Oculus Spirit [43143]
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wife's parents should pay for it***
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Jan 19, 2023, 1:04 PM
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Paw Warrior [4836]
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Re: Getting Married...
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Jan 19, 2023, 1:45 PM
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Pigeon Forge.
What other choice is there?
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Clemson Conqueror [11114]
TigerPulse: 73%
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Top TigerNet [30599]
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TLaw took his bride to the Waffle House ...
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Jan 19, 2023, 1:55 PM
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and its working out okay for him.
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Orange Phenom [14135]
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3 words: Great Wolf Lodge***
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Jan 19, 2023, 2:04 PM
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Ultimate Tiger [33248]
TigerPulse: 100%
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WHAT ? ? ? Honeymoon and birth control on the same trip ?
Jan 19, 2023, 2:24 PM
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ahhhh - I see - genius.
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Game Day Hero [4543]
TigerPulse: 70%
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Re: Getting Married...
Jan 19, 2023, 2:10 PM
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just be honest
and good luck
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110%er [3982]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Re: Getting Married...
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Jan 19, 2023, 2:16 PM
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You both should decide on where you go.
If you're rich, go to Hawaii.
If you can't afford that, then go to the nearest motel.
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Tiger Titan [50706]
TigerPulse: 79%
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I think you should tell her
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Jan 19, 2023, 2:14 PM
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that you want your honeymoon to be memorable in every way, but that you also want to get your marriage off to a good start financially. Tell her how seriously you take your role as provider.
Then tell her your thoughts on what the trip budget should be. Maybe tell her why you chose that number (e.g., how it allows for a nice trip but won't result in financial stress when you get back). Then have some ideas for what kind of trip that budget will allow, then ask her thoughts.
I would end with a promise that for a future anniversary, you two can take the international all-inclusive trip she has always dreamed about. And then do your best to plan for that and make it happen.
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Head Coach [932]
TigerPulse: 96%
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mexico is technically out of country and fairly affordable***
Jan 19, 2023, 2:14 PM
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Heisman Winner [78433]
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Re: Getting Married...
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Jan 19, 2023, 2:18 PM
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I say no to trip have fiance and future wife on same trip will likely be very awkward
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National Champion [7838]
TigerPulse: 99%
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Re: Getting Married...
Jan 19, 2023, 2:42 PM
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My fiancé and I are going to Iceland for our honeymoon. We are going to drive the Ring Road over 10 days and speed one night in Reykjavik.
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All-TigerNet [5706]
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Doing speed in Reykjavik is a bad idea***
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Jan 19, 2023, 3:36 PM
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Ring of Honor [22118]
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Team Captain [493]
TigerPulse: 82%
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Re: Not sure what you consider expensive but below is a link
Jan 19, 2023, 3:59 PM
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Thanks for the link. Unfortunately, something like that is even a good ways off from what I've been able to amass in the past year or so. Throughout the day I have been able to find some more unique and beautiful options that are only a few hours from us in both Western NC and north Georgia that may just be the ticket to making our honeymoon a unique and memorable experience.
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Ring of Honor [22118]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Wish you all the best!***
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Jan 19, 2023, 4:29 PM
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Legend [6955]
TigerPulse: 100%
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spend the money
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Jan 19, 2023, 2:56 PM
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I mean within reason, but enjoy your youth / health / life while you can. I'm generally frugal, but the older I get, the more I realize live your life while your young and enjoy.
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MVP [504]
TigerPulse: 99%
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Re: Getting Married...
Jan 19, 2023, 3:41 PM
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A 7-day all-inclusive trip in an off-peak period should only be approximately $2k from Atlanta and around $2.2K from Charlotte. Best deals are usually flying into Cancun and shuttling approximately an hour to Playa Del Carmen area. I always price Cancun, Punta Cana and Puerto Plata Dominican Republic, Jamaica, Costa Rica, Panama, Curacao, Roatan, and the Club Med in Florida and go wherever the deal is. Expedia, All Inclusive Outlet, Vacation Express, and Cheap Carribean are all reputable websites to use and sometimes have exclusive deals to certain resorts.
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Clemson Icon [24475]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Joined: 2013
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This thread will have 2 or more SKRONG POTD candidates.
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Jan 19, 2023, 3:46 PM
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Lots of good advice here, Longdong.
~JKB
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Paw Warrior [4641]
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Re: This thread will have 2 or more SKRONG POTD candidates.
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Jan 19, 2023, 4:22 PM
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Paw Warrior [4886]
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Re: This thread will have 2 or more SKRONG POTD candidates.
Jan 19, 2023, 10:03 PM
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Omg long duk dong ^^^^^^ Love that movie! So funny ?
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Ultimate Tiger [33248]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Joined: 2011
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2 quick questions:
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Jan 19, 2023, 3:54 PM
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1. If everything in “life” goes as planned are you at the low end, middle part, or high end of your earnings potential across your lifetime ?
Meaning - if you are just starting out in your chosen field and you have 30 to 40 years of employment ahead of you, you SHOULD be at the low end of your earnings potential.
2. What are your savings for / what are you saving for ???
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Team Captain [493]
TigerPulse: 82%
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Re: 2 quick questions:
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Jan 19, 2023, 4:03 PM
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1.) I am more towards the low end of my earning potential, though I am slowly reaching the middle point (I'm 25 and get paid more than I should).
2.) I originally started my savings account to purchase family land (which I did last year). I did not grow up with excess money to go around (I was always taken care of), so I feel it is important to have a good security blanket (mines not large currently). I also am currently saving to build a house on the land that I purchased last year.
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Paw Warrior [4641]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Re: 2 quick questions:
Jan 19, 2023, 4:13 PM
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Tread carefully, soon you will be expected to pay TNET my Freebird
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Ultimate Tiger [33248]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Joined: 2011
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Appreciate the candor. If having a great honeymoon
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Jan 19, 2023, 4:27 PM
[ in reply to Re: 2 quick questions: ] |
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experience speaks to you on some level, I would say blow it out. Get as close to what see envisions as you can.
1. You are young, you have your health, you can make more money. You will never have this opportunity again - first marriage, first honeymoon, first chance to have an awesome bonding experience / shared memory with your bride.
2. No matter how much you have socked away, if you are more on the thrifty / gotta get it all put away right now - it will never be enough. That's a tough perspective to deal with - for you AND for your wife - unless she 100% agrees with this perspective.
3. As in everything - you gotta find balance. You have the land - at 25 ! ! ! ( Congerts - HUGE accomplishment ) Now, live a little - especially if it is a shared experience with your wife. Then get back to building the savings, investing, building that part - TOGETHER. It has more value for both of you if done that way, in my opinion.
It sounds like you are already ahead of the environment you were raised in - again, another BIG ATTA BOY - just don't let thriftiness become a thing between you and your wife. Communicate it out - and if an amazing travel experience is something cool to you (and you can get away from the weight of what it costs) - then my vote is DO IT ! ! ! ! It only happens once.
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All-American [595]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Re: Getting Married...
Jan 19, 2023, 3:56 PM
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I would get travel credit cards yesterday and start putting as many expenses on them as possible but only if I can pay off every month with no exceptions. There is even a card that you can use to pay your rent. I would then book my flight using mikes and resort stay with points and have an almost free trip albeit the cost of the credit cards. You can close the cards after one year to avoid the annual fee if not worth it to you but usually you can downgrade the card for a lower or no annual fee card. If not, open a card right before you close it to limit the impact to your Credit availability. I wish I did this. I ended up getting a pretty cheap all inclusive resort in Jamaica through Costco. Another idea I think but can’t confirm is on your wedding register you can have people for gifts contribute towards your honeymoon and/or excursions. Travel as much as possible before kids, money comes and goes.
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Paw Warrior [4641]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Re: Getting Married...
Jan 19, 2023, 4:08 PM
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de·ni·al
/dəˈnī(ə)l/
the refusal of something requested or desired.
"the denial of insurance to people with certain medical conditions"
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All-In [10782]
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It all depends...
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Jan 19, 2023, 4:08 PM
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If she looks like the girl on the left, you need to have an open and honest discussion about both of your financial goals. If she looks like the girl on the right, break the bank
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Paw Warrior [4886]
TigerPulse: 100%
37
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Re: It all depends...
Jan 19, 2023, 10:09 PM
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The girl on the left has no makeup on! Take my word for it, I’m a woman and know makeup. The one on the left would look like the one on the right if she had makeup on and vice versa. Makeup can completely change someone’s looks. Always see your woman without makeup before you make any decisions ?
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All-In [10782]
TigerPulse: 100%
45
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Re: It all depends...
Jan 20, 2023, 5:23 PM
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They are the same person. Pictures are from a makeover site
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Paw Warrior [4641]
TigerPulse: 100%
37
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Re: Getting Married...
Jan 19, 2023, 4:26 PM
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Make sure you can afford a 3rd bathroom
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CU Guru [1501]
TigerPulse: 76%
30
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SUCKA!
2
Jan 19, 2023, 4:28 PM
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?
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Paw Warrior [4641]
TigerPulse: 100%
37
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Re: SUCKA!
1
Jan 19, 2023, 4:38 PM
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oh and does she read TNET?
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Ultimate Tiger [33248]
TigerPulse: 100%
56
Posts: 15113
Joined: 2011
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One other thing: if you have enough STUFF already,
1
Jan 19, 2023, 4:35 PM
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"register" for cash for the honeymoon. HINT - most everyone has all the STUFF they need.
Wedding presents take time and money from the givers of the gift.
It is easy to Venmo, Zelle, write a check . . . and then you guys could take an afternoon at the all-inclusive, nekkid on the beach, drinking umbrella drinks - writing postcards to the folks that contributed to the trip.
I would love either side of that - getting a postcard from you guys at a place I helped get you to . . .
or
Laying beside your wife nekkid on the beach, writing postcards.
Big win all around.
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National Champion [7605]
TigerPulse: 100%
42
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Re: Getting Married...
Jan 19, 2023, 5:25 PM
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Best advice is to talk her out of the whole thing. If that doesn't work, then skip the big wedding plans, go to a Justice of the Peace, knock on the door, then run back to the car and tell her the dude's not home. Then get room at a nice place on a lake or a mountain top and hide for a week of love, exploration and getting to know each other. Then go your separate ways and promise never to speak of this again.
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All-TigerNet [5666]
TigerPulse: 100%
39
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Re: Getting Married...
2
Jan 19, 2023, 6:59 PM
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1) Need to be honest with her/her family. If this creates an issue....then I would really re-consider your plans. I got a great wife...better than most, if not all the guys I know, but marriage is tough. An issue like this shouldn't be an issue. If it is, that's a big red flag IMO.... Your fiancée should already know your financial situation, so this (you being short on funds for the type of trip she is expecting) shouldn't be a surprise to her. She should be very understanding about it. If not......
2)Have you considered delaying the honeymoon (type she wants) until you can afford it? I know several couples who have done a quick long weekend get-a-way, and then do a real honeymoon when they can afford it. For me at least, I wouldn't want to go on a once-in-a-lifetime trip (your honeymoon) being worried about $$$. Save up enough to where you can afford it and have a great, worry-free time.
3)Judge above had a great suggestion--why not do a smaller wedding and then take the saved funds and apply it to the honeymoon. My wife and I had a huge wedding, don't regret it, but looking back it didn't need to be that big. We (her parents) could've spent $20K less and it wouldn't have been such a packed scene....
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All-TigerNet [6021]
TigerPulse: 100%
39
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Re: Getting Married...
Jan 19, 2023, 8:04 PM
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Go somewhere you'll both enjoy visiting for a few days relatively nearby to you (Destin, Nashville, New Orleans, Charleston, ect...). Explain to her that once you make enough money one day y'all will go wherever she wants as a belated honey-moon present. She'll understand.
Next to engagement rings, honeymoons can get expensive quickly. I spent 10k on our 15 years ago, and that bought us 9 days including air fare.
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Orange Blooded [2597]
TigerPulse: 100%
32
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Re: Getting Married...
Jan 19, 2023, 8:24 PM
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Do not go to Caymen Brac unless you are into skin diving. By the way, when are you getting married?
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Clemson Conqueror [11397]
TigerPulse: 100%
46
Posts: 13352
Joined: 2014
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It's ridiculous what some guys spend on an engagement ring!
Jan 19, 2023, 9:01 PM
[ in reply to Re: Getting Married... ] |
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I know some who have spent $20,000 or more! I will give my wife credit for saving me several thousand bucks...she insisted she did NOT want a real diamond, bacause many are so-called "blood diamonds".
She only wanted a nice fake one, which I think was only around $500, is almost as hard as diamond and people won't be able to tell the difference! Moissanite is considered to be the best fake diamond
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Ring of Honor [23565]
TigerPulse: 100%
53
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Look man, you know you're gonna get a lot of crazy answers
2
Jan 19, 2023, 8:27 PM
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when you post something like this on a message board. Some people mean well, some don't, and some are just toying with you. I got married over 40 years ago, and the best advice I can give you is to just do what makes financial sense for you guys at this point in time. Our decision was easy. We both came from humble origins, as they say... and were early in our careers. We ditched the big wedding and fancy honeymoon to save our money for the down payment on a house. Spent a week at a secluded cabin up in the NC mountains and had a blast. Never regretted it. We knew better times and nicer vacations were just around the corner...
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Game Changer [2013]
TigerPulse: 59%
31
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Re: Getting Married...
Jan 19, 2023, 10:06 PM
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PLENTY of ways you can go all inclusive for $500 to $1000 a piece NO MORE. Try cheap Caribbean and Apple vacations. We did a trip on cheap Caribbean for $1200 total all inclusive for 5 nights in the DR. It was fantastic.
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Paw Warrior [4886]
TigerPulse: 100%
37
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Re: Getting Married...
1
Jan 19, 2023, 10:51 PM
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I’m a woman and I think it depends on how important it is to your fiancé. If this trip means a lot to her then I think you should do it but nothing extravagant. There are some all-inclusive resorts in the Caribbean that are really not that expensive. My 1st thought when I saw your post was to use the money you receive for wedding gifts to pay for your honeymoon. I most always give money for wedding gifts and I think many people these days do it also.
Also, as mentioned before, you can list on your registry that you wish to receive cash for your honeymoon. I just sent a wedding gift for this recently.
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All-TigerNet [5860]
TigerPulse: 100%
39
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Three things you got to see eye on now...
Jan 20, 2023, 12:11 AM
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Money, sex, and kids....if yall cant agree on these things now, then your marriage will fail. Let her know the truth>>> that you want the two of you to start off on a good financial foundation, not in the red...
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Legend [6940]
TigerPulse: 100%
41
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Re: Getting Married...
Jan 20, 2023, 7:35 AM
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Uh... this is a big flashing red light. At this point in your relationship (about to get married) you all should have full financial disclosure with each other. If she knows your financial situation and is still pushing for this then you got future troubles. You all should be scraping together every cent you've got to get debt free and collect your down payment on buying your first home.
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Legend [6940]
TigerPulse: 100%
41
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Re: Getting Married...
Jan 20, 2023, 7:52 AM
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Just read that you are in the process of building a house on land you bought so Yay for you!!
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Orange Blooded [2184]
TigerPulse: 97%
32
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Re: Getting Married...
Jan 20, 2023, 9:00 AM
[ in reply to Re: Getting Married... ] |
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Future troubles? He’s got troubles right now and she’s obviously high maintenance.
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Game Changer [1704]
TigerPulse: 100%
31
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Re: Getting Married...
Jan 20, 2023, 8:01 AM
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I wasn't in an ideal position to afford an 'out of the country' honeymoon at the time we got married. However, I was fortunate enough to have a fantastic mother in law who gladly offered to pay for it. We took a weeklong Caribbean cruise which worked out nicely because the price includes all meals and you're in an exotic port each day you wake up. Once caveat is we were assigned to a table each evening with 3 other couples also on their honeymoon but they were from NJ, Ohio, and NY and obnoxious as hell but otherwise a fantastic week. So yeah see if you can trick your parents or in-laws into paying for it 
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Heisman Winner [85907]
TigerPulse: 100%
62
Posts: 38838
Joined: 2003
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Money, or lack of thereof, money PROBLEMS, has probably
1
Jan 20, 2023, 8:53 AM
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killed more marriages than all other factors combined. If you are not financially able to give your bride to be the foreign "Honeymoon of her dreams", then you need to have that conversation right now. She needs to know just exactly who, and what, she is potentially hitching her wagon up to. If she can't accept financial realities, then NOW is the time to find that out, not after the proverbial knot is tied.
Hope it all works out right, and you have a very happy marriage. But, remember, the MARRIAGE is what is important, not the honeymoon.
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Orange Blooded [2184]
TigerPulse: 97%
32
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Re: Getting Married...
Jan 20, 2023, 8:58 AM
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I’ve been married for over 35 years and I have only one thing to say.
Don’t do it.
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Freshman [0]
TigerPulse: 100%
1
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Re: Getting Married...
Jan 20, 2023, 1:15 PM
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Save yourself some life long problems. Move on. As bad as it may hurt now, you will be better off.
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Team Captain [493]
TigerPulse: 82%
18
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Re: Getting Married...
Jan 20, 2023, 5:29 PM
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I can tell you didn't read the update....
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Team Captain [493]
TigerPulse: 82%
18
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Re: Getting Married...the UPDATE!
1
Jan 20, 2023, 5:03 PM
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Well I figured after all the advice I received on the bored, I might as well give an update for you gents and gentettes.
I had a talk with my fiance' last night. The women and some of the men were right, she knew that I was too broke to afford to go on the trip of her dreams. Though she was slightly disappointed, she agreed that its better that we don't start the marriage of being in the hole a few thousand bucks.
Instead, we are looking into options regarding some different adventures that we can get into down in Florida (Specifically on our way to the keys). I'm thankful she was understanding, and this type of trip also allows me to stash away a few more bucks after I nab the airbnbs or vrbos that we will be staying at. Let's just hope gas doesn't hit astronomical highs by the time we hit the road. I think I can smell some good memories for me and the ole lady on the way.
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Rival Killer [2764]
TigerPulse: 100%
33
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Re: Getting Married...
Jan 20, 2023, 6:02 PM
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Always be honest...with yourself and with her. Use a grain of diplomacy, but upfront and honest is where you need to be. Make plans, set goals, make sure your finances are secure. I can absolutely tell you that women want financial security. Plan with her, dream, figure out how to make it happen. That can be a lot of fun and make some meaningful memories.
Starting out broke, worried and scared is no way to be. The mental stress will cause both of you to fight, second guess and that leads to other problems.
My wife and I went to Cali for a week, sonoma valley. Stayed at a remodeled school house on the grounds of a vineyard. In my case, they gave us the room because I sold more of their wine than anyone on the east coast. We went from vineyard to vineyard. Had an absolute ball. Found great food, wine, scenery. Spent money on the plane, you can find some reasonable airbnbs. Rent a car for $$. There are plenty of things to do without spending a fortune. Make it about the two of you, not where you go.
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