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Clemson Icon [24951]
TigerPulse: 100%
54
Posts: 10068
Joined: 2014
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Congrats! Made it to Friday! Here's your 'Dad Jokes' reward!
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Jun 27, 2025, 8:07 AM
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Reward? That's a stretch, but I needed a (semi) clever lead-in! Don't want to bore the boreds!
When I was little, I didn't care what I wore. I just went along with what my parents chose. When I look at old photos, I realize I didn't care either!
My neighbor takes his boys' iPhones away every night at 9PM. Last night they each set alarms to go off at various times during the night. He was impressed...now, they're grounded. (Last word matters!)
For Jedi Kermit® and his buddy, BigAl31®:
Grandma just asked my niece, "If the stork is the bird that delivers the babies, what is the bird that prevents pregnancy?" She replied, "I have zero idea!"
Grandma answered, "The Swallow!"
I fell to floor laughing...sides still hurt! 
Warm up your weekend attitude, Tiger Nation! Keep cool! And remember, if you only think 'WT F', you didn't really curse, but it might, MIGHT, help with not actually cursing! Then again, it may be like gas build-up with no release. Look, I'm just trying to help my Tiger brethren! 
Message was edited by: Salty55®
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Ultimate Clemson Legend [103867]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Posts: 26528
Joined: 2006
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lol and Happy Friday.***
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Jun 27, 2025, 8:09 AM
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TigerNet Elite [76990]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Re: Congrats! Made it to Friday! Here's your 'Dad Jokes' reward!
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Jun 27, 2025, 8:10 AM
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A typical macho man married a typical good looking lady, and after the wedding, he laid down the following rules. "I'll be home when I want, if I want, what time I want, and I don't expect any hassle from you. I expect a great dinner to be on the table, unless I tell you that I won't be home for dinner. I'll go hunting, fishing, boozing, and card playing when I want with my old buddies, and don't you give me a hard time about it. Those are my rules. Any comments?" His new bride said, "No, that's fine with me. Just understand that there will be sex here at seven o'clock every night, whether you're here or not."
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110%er [3789]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Re: Congrats! Made it to Friday! Here's your 'Dad Jokes' reward!
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Jun 27, 2025, 8:10 AM
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Where do surfers learn to surf? At boarding school!
Happy Friday! :0)
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Ultimate Tiger [36035]
TigerPulse: 100%
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My son won't listen to Whitesnake with me. Here I go again on my own.
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Jun 27, 2025, 8:18 AM
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My landlord told me we need to talk about the air conditioning bill. I said. "Sure, my door is always open."
When I was young I was scared of the dark. Now when I see my electric bill I am scared of the lights.
Over a century ago, two brothers thought it was possible to fly. Turns out, they were Wright.
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Tiger Titan [46501]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Re: Congrats! Made it to Friday! Here's your 'Dad Jokes' reward!
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Jun 27, 2025, 8:25 AM
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Did you hear about the explosion at the cheese factory?
Da Brie was everywhere!!
Do they allow loud laughing in Hawaii?
Or just a low ha?
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Orange Immortal [66062]
TigerPulse: 100%
60
Posts: 49542
Joined: 2000
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Where do lizards go when their tail falls off?
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Jun 27, 2025, 8:26 AM
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The retail store.
Where do pirates go when their hook comes off?
The second-hand store.
Who is the most popular guy at the nude beach?
The one that can carry a dozen donuts and 2 cups of coffee.
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Heisman Winner [84299]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Posts: 10102
Joined: 2015
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Re: Congrats! Made it to Friday! Here's your 'Dad Jokes' reward!
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Jun 27, 2025, 8:31 AM
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Old Mother Hubbard, went to the cupboard
To get her poor dog a bone
But when she bent over, Rover drove her
Cause he had a bone of his own
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Ultimate Tiger [36469]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Joined: 2014
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Re: Congrats! Made it to Friday! Here's your 'Dad Jokes' reward!
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Jun 27, 2025, 8:59 AM
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Why don’t women ever know what they want to eat for dinner?
Because the first time they chose they got kicked out of Eden…
If A is for apple and B is for banana, what is C for?
Plastic explosives.
Why did the non-binary prospector head out west?
Because there’s gold in them/their hills!
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TigerNet Immortal [177527]
TigerPulse: 100%
69
Posts: 29402
Joined: 2012
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Re: Congrats! Made it to Friday! Here's your 'Dad Jokes' reward!
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Jun 27, 2025, 9:04 AM
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A dad buys a lie detecter robot which slaps people when they lie.
He decides to test it at dinner.
"son, where were you today?"
Son says at school.
Robot slaps the son.
"Ok, I watched a dvd."
"What dvd?"
"Toy story"
Robot slaps the boy.
"OK it was a #### movie, cries the son."
"WHAT?!!" " When I was your age I didn't even know what a #### movie was"
Robot slaps the dad.
Mom laughs, "Hahaha! He's certainly your son."
Robot slaps the Mom!!
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Head Coach [981]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Re: Congrats! Made it to Friday! Here's your 'Dad Jokes' reward!
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Jun 27, 2025, 9:15 AM
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A white Russian walks into a bar and the bartender says, "We have a drink named after you." The Russian replies, "You have a drink named Vladimir?"
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Clemson Icon [24951]
TigerPulse: 100%
54
Posts: 10068
Joined: 2014
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TigerNet Immortal [177527]
TigerPulse: 100%
69
Posts: 29402
Joined: 2012
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He figured it out years ago.
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Jun 27, 2025, 11:48 AM
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Salty55®
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Clemson Icon [24951]
TigerPulse: 100%
54
Posts: 10068
Joined: 2014
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They usually do...
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Jun 27, 2025, 5:51 PM
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Orange Immortal [66062]
TigerPulse: 100%
60
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Joined: 2000
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One more . . . I once stayed in a crappy motel called "The Fiddle".
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Jun 27, 2025, 11:12 AM
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It really was a vile inn.
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All-Pro [741]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Re: Congrats! Made it to Friday! Here's your 'Dad Jokes' reward!
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Jun 27, 2025, 11:35 AM
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Why did the bartender bring a ladder to work? The drinks were on the house.
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