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Side to side. Hear me out...
General Boards - The Lounge
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Replies: 18
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Side to side. Hear me out...

4

Mar 14, 2025, 11:48 AM
Reply

I have heard many of you discuss the benefits of wiping front to back vs back to front.

Well, after 2 straight weeks of testing I a thrilled to report that wiping SIDE TO SIDE is the best method of all! I'm not going to lie, is was rough at first. The first 5 or 6 days was a real adjustment period. But now it's like I've done it this way all my life! There is no turning back. I can use 6-8 squares, maybe twice and done!

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Re: Side to side. Hear me out...

1

Mar 14, 2025, 11:59 AM
Reply

* looking for "side to side" button on bidet...no go

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You could actually be even more efficient by using the School Essay Method

3

Mar 14, 2025, 12:09 PM
Reply

and taking those 6-8 squares down to 3-4 squares by using the front and back of each square.



I mean...you DO want to help save the planet, right?

ringofhonor-rhtig.jpg flag link military_tech thumb_downthumb_up


I hvae been owning environmentalists for years

1

Mar 14, 2025, 1:05 PM
Reply

by claiming if they "love the environment" to use both sides of the TP.

badge-donor-05yr.jpg flag link military_tech thumb_downthumb_up

Locally Hated since 1992


Jokes on you

4

Mar 14, 2025, 1:09 PM
Reply

We don’t use TP


Pine cones are for more than patching holes in walls you know

2025 orange level memberbadge-donor-15yr.jpgringofhonor-cu85tiger.jpg flag link military_tech thumb_downthumb_up

“Anti-intellectualism has been a constant thread winding its way through our political and cultural life, nurtured by the false notion that democracy means that my ignorance is just as good as your knowledge.” Isaac Asimov
Panta Rhei Heraclitus


Re: Jokes on you

1

Mar 14, 2025, 2:25 PM
Reply

Or just use hand ✋️

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Re: Side to side. Hear me out...

2

Mar 14, 2025, 12:13 PM
Reply



2025 white level memberbadge-donor-10yr.jpg flag link military_tech thumb_downthumb_up

I for one am glad you are stopping. You are one of the most ignorant posters ever. You obviously think very highly of your own opinion, unlike the rest of us - RockHillTiger


I'm under doctor's orders to wipe back to front.

3

Mar 14, 2025, 1:02 PM
Reply

bekawze Pilonidal cyst. Used to wipe front to back, and would prefer that, but....well, after 2 surgeries, I'm listening to the doc on this one.

2025 orange level memberbadge-donor-20yr.jpgringofhonor-tiggity-110.jpg flag link military_tech thumb_downthumb_up


Re: I'm under doctor's orders to wipe back to front.


Mar 14, 2025, 1:26 PM
Reply

Dude those cysts are a literal pain in da ####. Daughter Pabst had one as a teen, needed surgery too.

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I guess I got a really good surgeon - I had an infected pilonidal cyst when


Mar 14, 2025, 1:54 PM [ in reply to I'm under doctor's orders to wipe back to front. ]
Reply

I graduated Clemson, and had to have surgery. In fact, I was going to go into the Navy after Clemson and be a Goose, but the infected cyst flunked my physical at Fort Jackson - could have been retired by now (or dead)...

Anyway, got the cyst removed and never have had another problem, even after sitting for most of my office career and wiping front to back...

2025 white level memberbadge-donor-20yr.jpg flag link military_tech thumb_downthumb_up

Surgeon said mine was one of the worst he'd ever seen.***


Mar 14, 2025, 2:12 PM
Reply



2025 orange level memberbadge-donor-20yr.jpgringofhonor-tiggity-110.jpg flag link military_tech thumb_downthumb_up


Pigs?***

1

Mar 14, 2025, 2:39 PM
Reply



2025 orange level memberbadge-donor-20yr.jpg flag link military_tech thumb_downthumb_up

Above all else, love and forgive. Understand that people who disagree with you are not necessarily idiots or your enemies. Respect the wisdom of the founding fathers and individual rights and freedoms. Always see the beauty and humor in life.


Surgeon said the nurses bout gagged when they opened mine up, haha...***


Mar 14, 2025, 2:52 PM [ in reply to Surgeon said mine was one of the worst he'd ever seen.*** ]
Reply



2025 white level memberbadge-donor-20yr.jpg flag link military_tech thumb_downthumb_up

The pinch is where its at.


Mar 14, 2025, 1:58 PM
Reply

Back and front simultaneous. It’s the height of nether region cleanliness.

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Re: Side to side. Hear me out...


Mar 14, 2025, 1:59 PM
Reply

I am not trying to conserve TP. I just want to be as clean as possible.

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If you can wipe side to side...

1

Mar 14, 2025, 1:59 PM
Reply

I suspect you don't have much to take off. If you did, you'd just be spreading the goo from the hole to the inner ass-cheek. Have you noticed any weird itching of stickiness?

2025 purple level memberbadge-donor-20yr.jpgbadge-ringofhonor-fordprefect.jpg flag link military_tech thumb_downthumb_up

"Side to side? Haha. Peasant. I have a bidet and

1

Mar 14, 2025, 2:26 PM
Reply

still shiz my pants." - 19B.

2025 free_orange level member flag link military_tech thumb_downthumb_up

drunk at the putt putt.


I do it using only one square.

1

Mar 14, 2025, 2:37 PM
Reply

Tear off one square, then tear a corner off of that and set it aside. Use the big piece to wipe, then use the corner to clean out from under your fingernails.

2025 orange level memberbadge-donor-20yr.jpg flag link military_tech thumb_downthumb_up

Above all else, love and forgive. Understand that people who disagree with you are not necessarily idiots or your enemies. Respect the wisdom of the founding fathers and individual rights and freedoms. Always see the beauty and humor in life.


My first though was asian women.


Mar 14, 2025, 6:41 PM
Reply

I've never considered side to side, that must be for fat people.

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Replies: 18
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