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YOUR BALANCE
Folks who are 40+....memory question.....
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Folks who are 40+....memory question.....


May 5, 2022, 8:49 AM

Just curious, what are your memory strengths and weaknesses? I dunno if I'm normal or not, but my short-term is excellent, and my long-term is downright incredible, but (I'm inventing a term here) my intermediate-term memory is complete and total shiite.

I can remember a conversation from 2 weeks ago verbatim and I can remember things my great-grandmother told me when she was making biscuits for me when I was 6, but man oh man, age 20 through the late 30's or so is just one big blur where not a lot really stands out. Dunno if this is normal or weird.

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Looks like I'm too cool for this thread***


May 5, 2022, 8:54 AM



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I was that cool at one point too.


May 5, 2022, 8:55 AM

I just don't remember it.

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I would agree, but was never that young.***


May 5, 2022, 9:17 AM [ in reply to Looks like I'm too cool for this thread*** ]



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similar


May 5, 2022, 8:55 AM

30s-40s are kind of a blur for me

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I wonder if they'll firm up more and be clearer when


May 5, 2022, 8:57 AM

I'm 60, the way my teens are to me now, or if it's as good as it gets.

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I am thinking probably not....


May 5, 2022, 9:00 AM

those were the years where my kids were growing up and I was running from one thing to another...now with only one minor in the house things are a tad bit slower...however, first grandchild was born a couple days ago...so we'll see what path this takes me.

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nice! Congrats grandpa!


May 5, 2022, 9:03 AM

I knew you were older than me but didn't realize you had reached McDonalds' senior coffee status yet.

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(unless)


May 5, 2022, 9:20 AM

this is an unexpected grandpa scenario, in which case I still say enjoy the little one but I'll tone down the "congrats" to a more appropriately muted level.

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A minor in the house, and a grandchild. I shuddered for a


May 5, 2022, 9:22 AM [ in reply to I am thinking probably not.... ]

moment, then realized we were in the same position for a could of years, the kids being 10 years apart. I suppose that answers the question about memory.

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Crazy thing is, there is about a 60% chance that your


May 5, 2022, 9:16 AM [ in reply to I wonder if they'll firm up more and be clearer when ]

memories are only rough reflections of what actually happened.

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The problem I have is


May 5, 2022, 8:57 AM

Remembering movie, restaurant and actor names.

Ones that don't come up often, it's hard for me to remember in conversation

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Ask me in 5 days


May 5, 2022, 8:57 AM

if you can remember

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Samesies


May 5, 2022, 9:00 AM

Buddy of mine from college sent our group text something about a praticular party, the date, #### that happenned, why cops got called. All kinds of detail that there is no justifiable way of remembering. We did not have smart phones. No facebook to give him a time hop reminder. This MFer just remembers ####.

You could put a gun to my head and i couldn't come up with any kind of detail like that from my 20s to early thirties.

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We sound like we might be in similar boats. During that


May 5, 2022, 9:01 AM

same time I absolutely reached peak social drinking, which makes me wonder if they're just blurred and aren't coming back.

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Yeah, i think that is a definite possibilty.***


May 5, 2022, 9:07 AM



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I actually feel like I remember my 30s quite well


May 5, 2022, 9:10 AM [ in reply to Samesies ]

The 20s are more of a blur because I guess life seemed to move fast, but I also partied way too much. I can recall college very accurately, though.

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[Catahoula] used to be almost solely a PnR rascal, but now has adopted shidpoasting with a passion. -bengaline

You are the meme master. - RPMcMurphy®

Trump is not a phony. - RememberTheDanny


I truly wish I recalled college well.


May 5, 2022, 9:13 AM

I was there 6 years so it seems like I'd have a deep well of distinct memories from the most formative time of my life, but in recollection, it's an amorphous blob of bits and pieces that feel like they span about 6 months.

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I've been struggling lately


May 5, 2022, 9:06 AM

And it gets me a little worried but maybe it's normal (43 years old). I'm having a hard time with short term stuff badly now, from where I put something to conversations I had with someone a couple of days ago. I'll start telling them something and they'll remind me that I already told em. Or I'll wonder why in the hell I would have put something somewhere that I never put it.

I'm having to put appointments down in a calendar now whereas in the past, I could remember them weeks in advance. And sometimes just doing little procedural things; today I put a Mother's Day card in the mail and it finally struck me halfway to work that I forgot to put postage on it.

But as you said, my longterm attention to detail is superb. I can still recall moments from early childhood crystal clear. I can remember small details from moments on my job or record keeping from a few years ago.

Sometimes I think we all still have a bit of COVID brain that's messing with us. I also know that once you're 40+, this #### is somewhat normal. But I also worry given I lost two grandmothers to Alzheimer's, and one of those was early onset.

You know, and the drinking.

Maybe it's just part of the simulation...

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[Catahoula] used to be almost solely a PnR rascal, but now has adopted shidpoasting with a passion. -bengaline

You are the meme master. - RPMcMurphy®

Trump is not a phony. - RememberTheDanny


No doubt, I took a huge step back for at least a year with


May 5, 2022, 9:11 AM

Covid and my cognitive abilities. I think I'm better but I also feel like I lost the point of reference I once had to compare anything to.

I always said though I felt like mentally, I aged 10 years overnight. Then I read this depressing study and it seems I might have underestimated the degradation.

https://www.imperial.ac.uk/news/236034/lasting-brain-impacts-severe-covid-19-equivalent/


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The last two years feel like five or more years went by


May 5, 2022, 9:17 AM

I was never diagnosed with COVID, but doesn't mean I didn't get it. But I also worry just the stress that it all came with had an effect. Either way, that shutdown time seems like ages ago and the people from that time are a blur.

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[Catahoula] used to be almost solely a PnR rascal, but now has adopted shidpoasting with a passion. -bengaline

You are the meme master. - RPMcMurphy®

Trump is not a phony. - RememberTheDanny


Is normal. Through 40-ish, i didn't use a calendar


May 5, 2022, 9:30 AM [ in reply to I've been struggling lately ]

for personal things. I had one for work appointments, of course, but for everything else, I just remembered it. Now, literally, if i'm meeting a friend for coffee the day after tomorrow, I have to put it on the calendar. If I do, I likely won't forget, but if I don't, I might. Everyone reports the same.

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My memory issues are mostly work related.


May 5, 2022, 9:11 AM

I do so many things on a given day that I instantly forget what I just did. Two examples:

1. A couple weeks ago I was having a meeting where a manager kept referring to some other meeting and I finally had to say, "Listen, I wasn't even on that call." Manager replied, "Murc, you represented our department in that meeting. Remember? You did great and the client loved you!" Hmm....

2. Was on a call earlier this week representing my department. I was ticking off the material on the agenda and I referred to a deliverable that was due on 04-May and I assured them they'd get it on time. The project manager had to cut in and say, "Murc, you sent those listings this morning."



In my personal life I'm doing pretty well, I think.

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I remember so much from over 50 years ago but can't


May 5, 2022, 9:12 AM

recall what I had for breakfast yesterday.

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I think a key part of anyone's memory is change


May 5, 2022, 9:20 AM

the more change you have in your life, the clearer your memory recollections are.

I was fortunate (I guess that's the word) that I moved around a LOT in my 20's and 30's, so my memories during those years are very distinct and exact. Example, most of the events of 1994 I recall because I lived in Chattanooga that year. So I know the OJ Simpson Bronco crap happened that year because I remember that's where I lived during that saga. I recall Fall of 1995 the Panthers being in Clemson and going to all those games because I lived/worked in Greenville that year. I can remember dates of specific concerts I attended over the years because I lived in Baton Rouge, or Knoxville, or Nashville, or wherever at that time. I can recall specifically when loved ones passed away because of where I lived at the time and my social circumstances. Things were always changing and new in those days.

Conversely, the last 10+ years I have lived in the same place. Same house, same job. My memories from that period aren't nearly as abundant nor clear because there wasn't much stark year-to-year changes. Everything kind of morphs into one hazier time block. For me, not much difference between say 2013 or 2014 or 2015. I can't remember exactly what fun or exciting things I did those years without looking it up.

Does this make sense? The less upheaval and change to your surroundings, the less specific memories you have of a certain period. I think that's why you remember your teenage years, or college years, or early married years better, because all of the new experiences you were having at that time.

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I've always been impressed by your memory though. I think


May 5, 2022, 9:25 AM

you're an outlier.

I think back to college and I can pull up a professor here and there, but I can't recall my complete course load from any of my 12 semesters. There are professors I couldn't recall if I had to.

Speaking of the Panthers, I went to a few Panthers games in Death Valley...don't remember a single minute of one or who I went with.

I don't remember going to the closing on my first house in Charlotte. I don't remember very much of my own wedding reception. I don't remember work promotions in my 20's and 30's. I don't remember job interviews.....

Stuff that seems should be significant enough to register, doesn't, and I just don't know if I'm normal or it's a harbinger of things to come.

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BRB, going to go update my living will with an Alzheimer's


May 5, 2022, 9:27 AM

clause that may or may not be legal.

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I think dementia shows up more when you remember


May 5, 2022, 9:35 AM

Ancient history better than recent stuff. I’m in Cola for Aunts funeral, and a flood of childhood and young adult memories are rolling throughmy head. Yesterday I learned I forgot to sign a form I mailed to a client.

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That's very true. I've seen it play out a lot, when


May 5, 2022, 9:39 AM

my great grandmother started calling me my 20 year older cousin's name, because she recalled him only at the age I was then.

My grandmother did the same thing, calling my son my name when she saw him.

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I hadn't thought about it, but I think that is true. We made


May 5, 2022, 9:36 AM [ in reply to I think a key part of anyone's memory is change ]

3 moves in the past 10 years, well past the age of "I can't remember anything anymore". However, the events surrounding those moves and the first year or so after each one I remember very well, lots of details. What happened last year, not so much. I think you're onto something there.

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I'm still on your idea.


May 5, 2022, 10:14 AM [ in reply to I think a key part of anyone's memory is change ]

The moves were actually 4 in the past 11 years. Those 4 moves were in the first 6 years of those 11. That entire 6 year period - not just the moves - is almost like a movie: I can replay seemingly the entire thing, as much detail as I want to bring up. The most immediate 3 years, I can't remember who I was married to. Same girl 11 years ago as today, so I assume its been the same girl all along.

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I have reached the age where


May 5, 2022, 9:21 AM

I have to think pretty hard to remember where I parked when I come out of the grocery store (for real). Sometimes it takes me a bit to remember what I had for lunch yesterday.

I can remember stuff from when I was 3 years old with amazing accuracy.

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MauldinT, where are you???


did you remember


May 5, 2022, 9:29 AM

that I am dropping off my sweet 2003 Acura TL at your place this weekend and you are changing the motor mounts? If not, this is just a friendly reminder.

Thanks!!!!!

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Cat on a tin roof, dogs in a pile,
Nothin' left to do but smile, smile, smile!!!!


LOL...meant to ask.


May 5, 2022, 9:30 AM

What'd you get for the bus? I lost the auction link.

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a paltry $13k


May 5, 2022, 9:32 AM

sold it to some bigwig who has a '59 bus that is all tricked out, I know Bertha is going to a good home

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Cat on a tin roof, dogs in a pile,
Nothin' left to do but smile, smile, smile!!!!


daaaang. Hope you at least came out on the upside.


May 5, 2022, 9:33 AM

I know you had a lot of memories with it that made it worth the price of admission.

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yeah, the memories were great


May 5, 2022, 9:42 AM

fun to tailgate with
my dog Deal hated riding in it
people would wave and get excited when I drove by like I was in a parade
only broke down on the side of the road 4x which is not bad
broke down more times in my driveway which was a better location to breakdown
only 2 VW mechanics died while I had it, have nobody local that I could take it to anymore
a fookin blast to drive

$13k probably paid for all of the parts that went into it

now looking for a sprinter type vehicle, class B is what I think you indicated, keep a look out please

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Cat on a tin roof, dogs in a pile,
Nothin' left to do but smile, smile, smile!!!!


If you aren't in a rush, I'd give it a year or so.


May 5, 2022, 9:45 AM

RV industry had it's greatest years ever the past 2 years, and like a lot of other things, the resale market on those is insane.

Just like with boats, the minute the economy dips there are going to be a ton of people with toys that they can't afford and never should have bought on 20 year notes getting dumped on the market, if not repossessed. It'll be a buyer's market sooner than later, just not in the very short term.

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I might be tailgating out of a 2003 Acura TL this year then***


May 5, 2022, 9:48 AM



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Cat on a tin roof, dogs in a pile,
Nothin' left to do but smile, smile, smile!!!!


Unless you are two townhouse rich.


May 5, 2022, 9:50 AM

If so than go for it. What I do know though is that what was a $50-60k class-B used sprinter in 2019 is now a $90k class-B used sprinter.

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um, no


May 5, 2022, 9:55 AM

also not against buying an older model that has a good track record for that production year

are there good years for class-Bs?

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Cat on a tin roof, dogs in a pile,
Nothin' left to do but smile, smile, smile!!!!


Winnebago and Airstream make nice ones....lots more


May 5, 2022, 10:02 AM

brands on a Sprinter chassis but some are better than others. Truth be told an Econoline E350 chassis isn't bad either.

One truism I've found is that I would take 2019 or earlier over anything made post-Covid. Because they've been so popular since then, the factories have been running 3 shifts around the clock, suspending their drug testing (read: you literally have methheads assembling them now), and they quality of them has gone from iffy to laughable.

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Re: If you aren't in a rush, I'd give it a year or so.


May 5, 2022, 10:53 AM [ in reply to If you aren't in a rush, I'd give it a year or so. ]




I've been waiting on this to happen for a few years now...

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Would have happened already had our benevolent government


May 5, 2022, 10:55 AM

not sprinkled so much "stimulus" on the country. It's coming now.

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RV lots are looking a little more full now, but boats are


May 5, 2022, 10:59 AM

still insane. It has been tempting to sell mine, but it would cost $100k+ to get into something the same size. To make it worse, all of the late model used boats that end up getting dumped onto the market will be some terrible color like all black or red.

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I'm constantly walking into a room and forgetting why I came


May 5, 2022, 9:31 AM

in there.

My life is filled with so much minutiae, it's challenging to keep it all going.

I look back at my 20s and think what the eff did I do with all of my time?

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Also, I went through a fairly traumatic even with one of my


May 5, 2022, 9:36 AM

children in November, we almost lost him and he was in the ICU for a week. I managed to churn through life in the months that followed but I have very little recollection of things I did. A few things have turned up in my work that I didn't apply my normal attention to detail, but it's like my brain was on autopilot and then completely erased all the of the small unimportant details from that time period.

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damgurl


May 5, 2022, 9:37 AM

didn't realize that.....glad you're through that and hope full recovery has been achieved.

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He is doing really really well now, all things considered


May 5, 2022, 9:50 AM

but will never be 100 percent the same. He has the best attitude and is the happiest, sweetest kid. School has been a little bit of a struggle, when it never was before... but everyday he improves.

He suddenly went into an extended seizure (status epilepticus) caused by autoimmune encephalitis. Super duper rare. We were extremely fortunate that the ER we started in got him life flighted out of there.

But yeah, my memory from all of that is completely shot.

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hope everything is better***


May 5, 2022, 9:44 AM [ in reply to Also, I went through a fairly traumatic even with one of my ]



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Cat on a tin roof, dogs in a pile,
Nothin' left to do but smile, smile, smile!!!!


KMS be like


May 5, 2022, 9:44 AM [ in reply to I'm constantly walking into a room and forgetting why I came ]



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piece parts


May 5, 2022, 9:36 AM

Some things I remember vividly, other stuff, not at all.

I actively try to dump memories that weren't that great, and think about the stuff that was good or worthwhile..so am I really remembering what actually happened, or just remembering the last time I remembered it?

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Have you tried Prevagen?


May 5, 2022, 9:39 AM

Axeing for a frand.

Seriously, like you long term memory is great, but I can enter a conversation at a conference and 10 minutes later I can't remember the person's name.

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https://as1.ftcdn.net/v2/jpg/00/81/16/28/1000_F_81162810_8TlZDomtVuVGlyqWL2I4HA7Wlqw7cr5a.jpg


Working the brain is like working any muscle group in your


May 5, 2022, 9:43 AM

body...use it or lose it. The one thing I think hurts almost everyone in this day and age is having instant answers at your fingertips by Googling questions on an ever-present connected device. You end up not remembering a lot of things because you don't have to, so you 'clear that from your cache' (so to speak) without even knowing you do it.

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That's a tremendous point. Case in point, I've lived here


May 5, 2022, 9:47 AM

since 2013. This is embarrassing but there are places in town that I could eventually get to, but probably not drive straight there without Waze.

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I have been lately purposely looking at directions


May 5, 2022, 9:53 AM

for places and then trying to get there without navigation

it has worked out pretty decent and I have found out it is more distractive if you are depending on navigation while driving around

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Cat on a tin roof, dogs in a pile,
Nothin' left to do but smile, smile, smile!!!!


I'd also say that playing a musical instrument is one of the


May 5, 2022, 9:55 AM [ in reply to That's a tremendous point. Case in point, I've lived here ]

best brain exercises a human can engage in. Ever since I started working from home when the pandemic hit, I pick up the bass several times during the day when things are slow for a few minutes and it's very noticeable how 10 minutes or so of running up and down the fretboard refreshes my brain.

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Re: Working the brain is like working any muscle group in your


May 5, 2022, 10:44 AM [ in reply to Working the brain is like working any muscle group in your ]

- It doesn't help as much as people say.
- If you do it too much you get weird.
- People who don't do it seem happier.
- People make money telling you to do it.
- It just takes too much darn time.

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Seems like it's correlated with my alcohol intake.***


May 5, 2022, 10:47 AM



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Re: Folks who are 40+....memory question.....


May 5, 2022, 10:53 AM

I got a mixed bag.

Short and long was great in my 20's. In my 30's work forced me to live off post-it or note pad lists. Just the sheer volume of different things I had to remember everyday was overwhelming.

In my 40's some more stress created memory holes. Like some things just not even making it into my memory at all. A lot of times you have hazy memories, but this is blackout territory. Like going on a trip with family and simply losing an event because of work overload.

Got into a big disagreement with the Mrs. and in-laws over whether we had been to a small town or not. "Been there? We ate lunch there!" Not a wisp of a trace of a vapor of it in my memory. It simply never got logged in at all. Probably on the phone at the time dealing with work.

Agree that the internet reduces the need for memory. That's good and bad. Also, ever had a flood of memories from a smell or taste? Walked into an old home that smelled like my grandma's, and it was like unlocking a chest of old memories, just from a single smell. Very cool.

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Re: Folks who are 40+....memory question.....


May 5, 2022, 10:55 AM

Mine is more visual vs audial. I have a very good visual memory, but my audial memory is a little suspect.

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Pot smoking does that.


May 5, 2022, 5:38 PM

I tried to tell you, don't.

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