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Ring of Honor [21862]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Make it a gentle 'Dad Joke' Monday...have to pace ourselves!
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Apr 28, 2025, 8:36 AM
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Jumping right in!
Read the vowels in 'Celine Dion' out loud! You're welcome! 
The teacher asked Johnny, "What's two and tow?" He counted 1-2-3-4 on his fingers and said, "Four, teacher?"
"Correct," she said, but you counted on your fingers. Put your hands behind your back and tell me what's three and three."
He put his hands behind his back, fumbled around, and answered, "Six, teacher?"
"Yes, that's right, but you're still counting your fingers," she said. "Put your hands in your pockets and tell me what's five and five."
He did as told, fumbled around and replied, "Eleven, teacher?" 
Have a great day...and a better week, T-Net! Go Tigers!
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TigerNet Elite [71882]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Re: Make it a gentle 'Dad Joke' Monday...have to pace ourselves!
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Apr 28, 2025, 8:39 AM
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"A woman dressed up as a policewoman, then surprised her boyfriend in their bedroom and told him he's under arrest on suspicion of being good in bed. After two minutes all charges were dropped due to a lack of evidence."
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Dynasty Maker [3301]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Re: Make it a gentle 'Dad Joke' Monday...have to pace ourselves!
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Apr 28, 2025, 8:40 AM
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April showers bring May flowers, but what do May flowers bring? Pilgrims! :0)
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TigerNet Elite [74588]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Re: Make it a gentle 'Dad Joke' Monday...have to pace ourselves!
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Apr 28, 2025, 8:44 AM
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A man goes to a gym and looks around. He notices all the stunning young women so he goes up to the manager and asks which machine should he go on to impress the young women. The manager takes a good look at him and after a few seconds replies....in your case sir I recommend the ATM.
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Ultimate Tiger [35246]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Re: Make it a gentle 'Dad Joke' Monday...have to pace ourselves!
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Apr 28, 2025, 8:53 AM
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What has more letters than the alphabet?
The post office!
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Orange Elite [5156]
TigerPulse: 100%
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I spilled spot remover on my dog.
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Apr 28, 2025, 8:57 AM
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Now he's gone.
*Credit: Steven Wright.
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Ultimate Tiger [33413]
TigerPulse: 100%
56
Posts: 14229
Joined: 2014
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Re: I spilled spot remover on my dog.
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Apr 28, 2025, 10:21 AM
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Love Steven Wright humor. +1
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Heisman Winner [78184]
TigerPulse: 100%
62
Posts: 120079
Joined: 1998
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Re: I spilled spot remover on my dog.
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Apr 28, 2025, 12:46 PM
[ in reply to I spilled spot remover on my dog. ] |
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I always liked his- I went out and bought some batteries and then found out they werent included
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Gridiron Giant [15910]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Re: Make it a gentle 'Dad Joke' Monday...have to pace ourselves!
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Apr 28, 2025, 10:11 AM
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Why did the cat not go to school on Monday? He was feline well.
What did the cyclops say on Monday morning? Eye don’t want to get up.
Why was the acid so rude on Monday? It was a-mean-o-acid.
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Solid Orange [1392]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Re: Make it a gentle 'Dad Joke' Monday...have to pace ourselves!
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Apr 28, 2025, 10:15 AM
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Where do baby cats learn to swim?
The kitty pool!
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Ultimate Tiger [33413]
TigerPulse: 100%
56
Posts: 14229
Joined: 2014
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Re: Make it a gentle 'Dad Joke' Monday...have to pace ourselves!
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Apr 28, 2025, 10:28 AM
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Many years ago, I was watching Johnny Carson and he was on vacation so Joan Rivers was hosting. She said she used to date some dumb jocks. One guy couldn’t even count to 21 with his pants on. I thought the best part was that the girl I was dating at the time, my future bride, turned to me and said she didn’t understand and asked for an explanation. She was pretty naive. But the real best part was she told my Dad the joke a couple of days later, then told him she didn’t get it and had to have me explain it. He was a true southern gentleman and it left him speechless. You can’t make this stuff up….
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Ultimate Clemson Legend [100818]
TigerPulse: 100%
64
Posts: 26180
Joined: 2006
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lol***
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Apr 28, 2025, 11:17 AM
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