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Replies: 14
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Clemson Icon [24714]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Posts: 10051
Joined: 2014
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110%er [3760]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Re: It's 'Dad Joke' Friday! You know what that means?
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Jun 6, 2025, 8:28 AM
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I just told my luggage that there will be no vacations this year. Now I’m dealing with “emotional” baggage.
At the airport last night a man fainted and slumped over onto the baggage carousel. He slowly came around…
The airline wouldn’t let me take any dead deer on the plane with me. They said that my carrion was too large.
I hope everyone has a great weekend and/or vacation!
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All-In [10862]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Re: It's 'Dad Joke' Friday! You know what that means?
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Jun 6, 2025, 8:31 AM
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I really love the word, "plethora", it means a lot to me.
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TigerNet Elite [76525]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Re: It's 'Dad Joke' Friday! You know what that means?
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Jun 6, 2025, 8:39 AM
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Sarah goes to school, and the teacher says, "Today we are going to learn multi-syllable words, class. Does anybody have an example of a multi-syllable word?" Sarah waves her hand, "Me, Miss Rogers, me, me!" Miss Rogers says, "All right, Sarah, what is your multi-syllable word?" Sarah says, "Mas-tur-bate." Miss Rogers smiles and says, "Wow, Sarah, that's a mouthful." Sarah says, "No, Miss Rogers, you're thinking of a blowjob."
A few months after his parents were divorced, little Johnny passed by his mom's bedroom and saw her rubbing her body and moaning, "I need a man, I need a man!" Over the next couple of months, he saw her doing this several times. One day, he came home from school and heard her moaning. When he peeked into her bedroom, he saw a man on top of her. Little Johnny ran into his room, took off his clothes, threw himself on his bed, started stroking himself, and moaning, "Ohh, I need a bike! I need a bike!"
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Tiger Titan [45448]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Re: It's 'Dad Joke' Friday! You know what that means?
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Jun 6, 2025, 9:55 AM
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Jedi Kermit®, you took it up a notch today!!
Excellent!!
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Ultimate Tiger [35883]
TigerPulse: 100%
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I got a free air guitar, no strings attached.
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Jun 6, 2025, 8:47 AM
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Did you know :
- It takes seven seconds for food to pass from your mouth to your stomach.
- A human hair can hold three kilograms.
- The length of a ##### is tow to three times the length of the thumb.
- The femur bone is as hard as concrete.
- A woman's heart beat's faster than a man's.
- Women blink two times as much as men.
- We use 300 muscles to keep our balance when we stand.
- A woman has read this entire text while a man is still looking at his thumb.
I got in touch with my inner Jedi Kermit®
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TigerNet Immortal [172885]
TigerPulse: 100%
69
Posts: 48250
Joined: 2007
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I like to keep a good supply of cheese on hand for emergencies
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Jun 6, 2025, 9:08 AM
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just in queso
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Ultimate Tiger [36050]
TigerPulse: 100%
56
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Joined: 2014
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Re: It's 'Dad Joke' Friday! You know what that means?
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Jun 6, 2025, 9:23 AM
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I made a playlist for hiking. It has music from Peanuts, the Cranberries and Eminem. I call it my trail mix.
I tripped over a Kleenex box today and thought I had injured myself.
Turns out it was just tissue damage.
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Top TigerNet [32279]
TigerPulse: 100%
55
Posts: 16490
Joined: 2015
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What do you call a sleeping bull?...
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Jun 6, 2025, 9:31 AM
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A Bull-Dozer...
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Tiger Titan [45448]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Re: It's 'Dad Joke' Friday! You know what that means?
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Jun 6, 2025, 9:52 AM
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Mom: if a stranger came up to you and said, “I’m your Mom’s friend, she told me to pick you up.”
What would you say?
Kid: I’d say, “You’re lying, my Mom has no friends.”
Mom: Not where I was going, but ok.
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Ultimate Clemson Legend [103564]
TigerPulse: 100%
64
Posts: 26497
Joined: 2006
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lol, happy Friday.***
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Jun 6, 2025, 10:18 AM
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Game Changer [1940]
TigerPulse: 96%
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In the courts!
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Jun 6, 2025, 12:03 PM
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Justice is a dish best served cold. If it were served warm, it would be just-water.
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Oculus Spirit [44764]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Posts: 22469
Joined: 2022
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Re: It's 'Dad Joke' Friday! You know what that means?
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Jun 6, 2025, 12:14 PM
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YeahBudddy
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CU Medallion [18062]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Re: It's 'Dad Joke' Friday! You know what that means?
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Jun 6, 2025, 1:39 PM
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What is it called when a chameleon can't change colors? A reptile dysfunction.
So a guy calls a swimming pool company and says, "I got a leak in my pool". The man that answered the phone says, “Well, go ahead.”
I hate those people who knock on your door and say you need to get 'saved' or you'll 'burn.' Stupid firemen."
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Redshirt [96]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Re: It's 'Dad Joke' Friday! You know what that means?
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Jun 6, 2025, 3:00 PM
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Did you hear about the guy who was in a car wreck and had his whole left side knocked off? He’s al’right’ now.
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