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Clemson Icon [24604]
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Joined: 2014
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It's Thursday! Uh...and some Dad Jokes, too!
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Jun 19, 2025, 8:43 AM
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Yup...and a holiday for some...
A man tells a priest, "I have a desire to live forever."
"Get married," replies the priest.
"And I'll live forever?", the man asked.
"No, but the desire will disappear!" (I'm curious...how would a priest know?)
What did one saggy bewb say to another saggy bewb?
We better perk up, or people will think we're nutz!
Women will always say:
All I need from you is Care, Attention, Support, and Honesty.
Now...put the all of the first letters together! 
You're a bad driver when Siri says: "In 400 feet, STOP...and let me the f!#k out!"
Tame the chaos of your day, Tiger Nation! Crisp and straight, Tiger golfers!
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TigerNet Elite [76285]
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Re: It's Thursday! Uh...and some Dad Jokes, too!
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Jun 19, 2025, 8:44 AM
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Little Sally came home from school with a smile on her face, and told her mother, "Frankie Brown showed me his weenie today at the playground!" Before the mother could raise a concern, Sally went on to say, "It reminded me of a peanut." Relaxing with a hidden smile, Sally's mom asked, "Really small, was it?" Sally replied, "No, salty." Mom fainted.
A man is lying on the beach, wearing nothing but a cap over his crotch. A woman passing by remarks, "If you were any sort of a gentleman, you would lift your hat to a lady." He replies, "If you were any sort of a sexy lady, the hat would lift by itself."
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110%er [3744]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Re: It's Thursday! Uh...and some Dad Jokes, too!
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Jun 19, 2025, 8:46 AM
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Not all construction work is equally enjoyable. For instance, drilling a large hole is boring, but fastening two pieces of metal together is riveting! :0)
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Oculus Spirit [44661]
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Re: It's Thursday! Uh...and some Dad Jokes, too!
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Jun 19, 2025, 8:50 AM
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One of the ants on my ant farm dresses up as a clown to cheer up his friends.
He’s an anti-depress ant!!
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Ultimate Clemson Legend [103365]
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lol, +1***
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Jun 19, 2025, 8:58 AM
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TigerNet Immortal [176593]
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Re: It's Thursday! Uh...and some Dad Jokes, too!
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Jun 19, 2025, 9:32 AM
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A teacher is explaining biology to her 4th grade students. 'Human beings are the only animals that stutter,' she says.
A little girl raises her hand. 'I had a kitty-cat who stuttered,' she volunteered.
The teacher, knowing how precious some of these stories could become, asked the girl to describe the incident.
'Well,' she began, 'I was in the back yard with my kitty and the Rottweiler that lives next door got a running start and before we knew it, he jumped over the fence into our yard!
'That must've been scary,' said the teacher.
'It sure was,' said the little girl.
My kitty raised his back, went 'Fffff, Fffff, Fffff'... And before he could say 'FRACK,' the Rottweiler ate him!'
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CU Medallion [19828]
TigerPulse: 96%
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Joined: 2004
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Re: It's Thursday! Uh...and some Dad Jokes, too!
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Jun 19, 2025, 9:40 AM
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Yup...and a holiday for some... A man tells a priest, "I have a desire to live forever." "Get married," replies the priest. "And I'll live forever?", the man asked. "No, but the desire will disappear!" (I'm curious...how would a priest know?) What did one saggy bewb say to another saggy bewb? We better perk up, or people will think we're nutz! Women will always say: All I need from you is Care, Attention, Support, and Honesty. Now...put the all of the first letters together! ">"> You're a bad driver when Siri says: "In 400 feet, STOP...and let me the f!#k out!" Tame the chaos of your day, Tiger Nation! Crisp and straight, Tiger golfers!
you forgot to mention "Happy Juneteenth!"
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Paw Master [17910]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Re: It's Thursday! Uh...and some Dad Jokes, too!
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Jun 19, 2025, 11:07 AM
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My wife said to me the other day, “If I have to choose between a husband and shoes, I choose shoes. They tend to last longer and are easier to replace.”
My wife and I always compromise. I admit I'm wrong and she agrees with me.
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All-Pro [732]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Re: It's Thursday! Uh...and some Dad Jokes, too!
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Jun 19, 2025, 11:38 AM
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Improving! Keep up the good work.
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