Gross Story Time

Nov 16, 2023, 2:43 PM

Man!

I just realized that something pretty nasty happened to me during my absense.

On most Saturdays, I swing by Lowe's foods and pick up two coffees for the missus and I. All other days, it's Circle K for me.

I was piddling around the house and came into the kitchen and saw two Lowes Foods coffees sitting there. I grabbed one and took a swig. - BARRRRFFFFF It was some sort of pumpkin spice crap. Man that was nasty.

I used my powers of deduction to confidently take a gulp of the second cup.

Strange. It's sour, like REAL sour, like lemon juice sour. Ughhh It feels like I just inhaled a piece of hairy sponge.... Those were my thoughts as I took my first swig. Then it hit me... This is rotten coffee.

I spit it out into the sink and dropped the cup. The cup was full of maggots and separated cream and coffee.

I calmly asked Sarahadidas "what the EFFFFFFFF is this coffee doing on the counter????"

"Oh, I found it on the porch. I must have left it there a month or two ago."

"So instead of throwing it out, you decided to put it next to a fresh cup of coffee and walk away???"

*silence*

You know nothing of willpower until this happens and you remain calm and don't end up on the nightly news.

I had a stomach ache and a sour taste in my mouth the entire weekend.

But I didn't die.