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Clemson Icon [24481]
TigerPulse: 100%
54
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Joined: 2014
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Happy 'Friday 13th' Dad Jokes! Some nice, others...suspect!
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Jun 13, 2025, 7:10 AM
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I'm not feeling very nice today! Hope you've had a great day, Iran!
I end a lot of sentences with 'Just sayin' because ending with 'dumb az-z' is considered offensive.
Imagine protesting in a country you entered illegally...waving the flag of a country you refuse to live in.
OK...I think I've gotten most out of my system...I think! 
A good ol' Bama boy won a bass boat in a raffle. He brought it home and his wife asks, "Whatcha gonna do with that? There ain't no water deep enough to float a boat within a hundred miles of here."
"I won it, I'm keepin' it," he said.
His brother visited a few days later...asks the wife, "Where's my brother?"
"He's out there in his bass boat," she pointed towards a field out back.
His brother heads out back...sees his brother, in his boat in the middle of a field, fishing rod in hand. (Spud®'s bro?  )
He yells out, "What are you doing?" "I'm fishing...what's it look like?", his brother shouted back.
His brother yells, "It's people like you that give Alabama a bad name, makin' everyone think we're stupid! If I could swim, I'd come out there and whip your az-z!"
Alright, Tiger Nation...don't let Triskaidekaphobia phase you in the least!
Message was edited by: Salty55®
Message was edited by: Salty55®
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Ring of Honor [22272]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Re: Happy 'Friday 13th' Dad Jokes! Some nice, others...suspect!
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Jun 13, 2025, 7:22 AM
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Nice 🙂 Your post always makes the day better 😀
GO TIGERS!!!
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Ultimate Clemson Legend [103096]
TigerPulse: 100%
64
Posts: 26454
Joined: 2006
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What did one eye say to the other eye?
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Jun 13, 2025, 7:26 AM
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Between you and me, something smells.
Credit for that one goes to my 10 year old.
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110%er [3716]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Re: Happy 'Friday 13th' Dad Jokes! Some nice, others...suspect!
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Jun 13, 2025, 7:27 AM
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Gravity is one of the most fundamental forces in the universe. Without IT you would have 'Gravy'. :0)
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TigerNet Elite [76093]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Re: Happy 'Friday 13th' Dad Jokes! Some nice, others...suspect!
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Jun 13, 2025, 7:47 AM
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An elderly Italian man in New Jersey wrote to his imprisoned son saying he was too old to dig his tomato garden.
The son replied, "Don't dig up the garden, that's where the bodies are buried."
The next morning the FBI showed up and dug the whole yard. They found nothing.
The elderly man got another letter. "Go ahead and plant the tomatoes now Pop. That is the best I could do. Love, Vinnie" tugalooriver®
Do you know why married women are heavier than single women?
Because single women come home, see what's in the fridge, and go to bed.
Married women come home, see what's in bed, and go to the fridge.
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Tiger Titan [49428]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Re: Happy 'Friday 13th' Dad Jokes! Some nice, others...suspect!
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Jun 13, 2025, 8:09 AM
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My teenager got nine out of ten on his driver’s test!
- The last guy managed to get out of the way.
I was crossing the street when I suddenly noticed my ex getting run over by a bus.
“Oh my goodness,” I thought to myself. “That could have been me!”
Then I remembered I can’t drive a bus.
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Ultimate Tiger [35649]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Just drank the best chocolate milk of my entire life. It was legendairy.
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Jun 13, 2025, 8:25 AM
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A man and his wife were cuddling one night when she said, "Show me a good time." So he stepped outside and ran an eleven second 100 meter sprint. I guess after that, he told her a dad joke and they went at it for thirty seconds.
My friend's dad just turned seventy. Back in his dad’s time, they called that the seven-teeth birthday.
The Lee family has really been stressing me out lately, maybe you have heard of them:
Emotional Lee, Mental Lee, Physical Lee and Financial Lee. I need to reach out to Spiritual Lee.
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Oculus Spirit [43780]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Re: Happy 'Friday 13th' Dad Jokes! Some nice, others...suspect!
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Jun 13, 2025, 8:29 AM
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What do you get when you pick a pig’s nose?
Ham boogers.
I know, I know… snot funny!
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Clemson Icon [24481]
TigerPulse: 100%
54
Posts: 10029
Joined: 2014
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The 'Groan' is on today!
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Jun 13, 2025, 9:22 AM
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Mercy! Mercy! Mercy!
This crew is bringing it!
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Paw Warrior [4999]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Re: Happy 'Friday 13th' Dad Jokes! Some nice, others...suspect!
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Jun 13, 2025, 8:34 AM
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"Imagine protesting in a country you entered illegally...with flags from a country you refuse to live in."
Yeah they didn't think that one through.
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CU Medallion [18660]
TigerPulse: 100%
52
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Joined: 2016
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Re: Happy 'Friday 13th' Dad Jokes! Some nice, others...suspect!
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Jun 13, 2025, 10:00 AM
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If April showers bring May flowers, what does May flowers bring? Pilgrims
You don't need a parachute to skydive. You need one to skydive twice.
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TigerNet Immortal [176199]
TigerPulse: 100%
69
Posts: 29312
Joined: 2012
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Re: Happy 'Friday 13th' Dad Jokes! Some nice, others...suspect!
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Jun 13, 2025, 10:03 AM
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Why do women fart after the pee?
They like to blow dry. (From the lady that cts my hair)
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Ultimate Tiger [35733]
TigerPulse: 100%
56
Posts: 14573
Joined: 2014
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Re: Happy 'Friday 13th' Dad Jokes! Some nice, others...suspect!
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Jun 13, 2025, 11:11 AM
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Who is your favorite bodybuilder?
Dr. Frankenstein.
Wife: You got kicked out of Hobby Lobby for dipping your bawls in glitter?
Husband: Pretty nuts, huh?
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