Replies: 12
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Hall of Famer [23290]
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Happy Heavenly Birthday to my big brother
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Jan 18, 2024, 7:55 PM
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He was 16 years older than me and would have been 77 today. He died in 1998 and I have to admit I’m still a little mad at him. He drank himself to death.
My first memories of him was when he was in the Navy. I barely remember it, but I just remember being really excited when he would come home for a few days. I was too little to understand at the time but evidently every time he went on leave he would drink until he ended up either in jail or in the hospital or both. After he got out of the Navy, I used to go spend a couple of weeks in the summer with him and his wife in Georgetown. I was maybe 8-10 years old. I remember him drinking a little beer but nothing outrageous when I was there. When he moved back to Johns Island we would go fishing a lot and I would stay at their house as often as possible. Somewhere around that time he got sober and was sober for about 8 years. During this time my Dad helped him get a job at the Shipyard in Charleston and gave him an acre of land to build a house on (that offer was available to any of us who wanted it and my brother and one sister took him up on it). Things were looking pretty good until he started drinking again. He lost his job and the house and his wife left him. My other brother took the house over but my Dad had to sell most of the rest of the land he had to keep it in the family. I don’t think Daddy ever forgave him. The last time I saw him was about 2 months before he died. He had just turned 51 but looked like he was closer to 80. Couldn’t hardly get out of the bed but had his drink right next to him.
I drink in moderation and don’t pretend to be perfect by any means. Thankfully, I’ve never had a problem with being able to stop before I went too far. Maybe I learned from the mistakes of others. If you can’t control yourself when drinking, please get help to stop and stay stopped. I really thought after 8 years he was going to be ok but once he started drinking again he just couldn’t or wouldn’t stop. And I still miss him and all the time we should have had together and all the fishing we didn’t get to do. Guess that’s why I’m still a little mad at him.
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Orange Blooded [2682]
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Re: Happy Heavenly Birthday to my big brother
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Jan 18, 2024, 8:05 PM
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Condolences.
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CU Guru [1065]
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Re: Happy Heavenly Birthday to my big brother
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Jan 18, 2024, 8:15 PM
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Sorry for your loss. I can’t imagine one of my siblings being gone, but know I may face it some day.
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110%er [5901]
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Re: I lost someone, that I cared a lot about, to the same thing.
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Jan 18, 2024, 8:14 PM
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I was to young to understand what was happening, but I do remember the turmoil, my family went through. I have heard unthinking people, condemn alcoholics and drug addicts, and the only thought that comes to mind is "There but for the Grace of God, go you and I". You have my deepest sympathies. I hope time has healed some of your families pain. God bless.
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All-TigerNet [10920]
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Alcoholism is a terrible thing. In the last four years, I've lost a cousin &
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Jan 18, 2024, 8:17 PM
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sister in law to burnt out livers, both in their early sixties!
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All-In [40365]
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Re: Alcoholism is a terrible thing. In the last four years, I've lost a cousin &
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Jan 18, 2024, 9:05 PM
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Wow... I'm so sorry. Prayers...
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All-In [40365]
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Re: Happy Heavenly Birthday to my big brother
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Jan 18, 2024, 9:04 PM
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Prayers for you brother. I had a very good friend who did the same thing. It is hard to watch and not be able to do anything about it. I hate you and your family had to go through that.
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All-In [26274]
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Re: Happy Heavenly Birthday to my big brother
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Jan 18, 2024, 9:11 PM
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Addiction is a terrible thing. Thanks for sharing.
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CU Medallion [52488]
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Re: Happy Heavenly Birthday to my big brother
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Jan 18, 2024, 9:17 PM
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Sorry for your loss - had an uncle who drank so bad that his son who was only around 8 or 9 took a bottle of bourbon out of the house and poured it into a ditch - sad that a child shows more wisdom than his father. Sometimes the dependency comes from metabolism or imbalances somewhere since some people drink a lot without being addicted . I think I was fortunate after getting out of the army and back in college with nightly trips to a certain bar in Rock Hill where Winthrop student hung out. I never felt like I needed a drink desperately but many people are the opposite and can't quit no matter how clearly they see the consequences.
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All-In [27451]
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Re: Happy Heavenly Birthday to my big brother
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Jan 18, 2024, 9:33 PM
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Very sorry that you have such a sad memory but hope that time and prayer ease your pain. Prayers.
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Heisman Winner [136879]
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Positive thoughts and prayers my friend!!!***
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Jan 18, 2024, 9:57 PM
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110%er [7202]
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I hurt for you and happy for you my friend.
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Jan 19, 2024, 1:08 AM
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Many years with him and he obviously loves you as you do him.
Don't ever mistake the crap that comes with the disease of addiction as any lowering of his love for you.
God bless you and all people that face addiction albeit in their lives or family's lives. God is good and those know to christ will be at his side. Tmail me if you ever need to talk.
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All-In [38416]
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GOOOOooooo TiGerS!***
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Jan 19, 2024, 8:49 AM
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Replies: 12
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