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Orange Blooded [2454]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Joined: 11/4/16
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Best Chuck Norris jokes ever....
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May 30, 2023, 12:06 AM
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Chuck Norris can kill two stones with one bird....
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Orange Blooded [2454]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Re: Best Chuck Norris jokes ever....
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May 30, 2023, 12:08 AM
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Superman owns a pair of Chuck Norris undies....
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Freshman [-79]
TigerPulse: 66%
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And Bruce Li stole them just for kicks and giggles
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May 30, 2023, 10:31 AM
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Bruce Li can kick Chucks ###.
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Commissioner [981]
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Re: Best Chuck Norris jokes ever....
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May 30, 2023, 12:40 AM
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Chuck Norris was born in a log cabin that he built with his bare hands
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Freshman [-79]
TigerPulse: 66%
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Bruce Li uses those boards for toothpicks***
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May 30, 2023, 10:32 AM
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Asst Coach [720]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Re: Best Chuck Norris jokes ever....
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May 30, 2023, 1:14 AM
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When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.
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Freshman [-79]
TigerPulse: 66%
Posts: 4600
Joined: 12/21/21
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The Boogeyman will mess with Chuck Norris
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May 30, 2023, 10:33 AM
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The Boogeyman doesn’t mess with Bruce Li
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Rock Defender [50]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Re: Best Chuck Norris jokes ever....
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May 30, 2023, 2:28 AM
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Did you know Chuck Norris's tears cure cancer? But he has never cried.
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Freshman [-79]
TigerPulse: 66%
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He did cry uncle when Bruce Li had him in an arm bar.***
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May 30, 2023, 10:34 AM
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All-Conference [438]
TigerPulse: 88%
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Re: Best Chuck Norris jokes ever....
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May 30, 2023, 2:29 AM
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Chuck Norris is the reason Waldo is hiding.
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Freshman [-79]
TigerPulse: 66%
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Not even Waldo knows where Bruce Li is lurking***
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May 30, 2023, 10:34 AM
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Head Coach [760]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Re: Best Chuck Norris jokes ever....
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May 30, 2023, 5:31 AM
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Chuck Norris was bitten by a king cobra and after three days of pain and suffering the snake finally died.
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Freshman [-79]
TigerPulse: 66%
Posts: 4600
Joined: 12/21/21
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And then Bruce Li grilled up some Chuck burgers
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May 30, 2023, 10:35 AM
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Venom and all
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All-TigerNet [13359]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Re: Best Chuck Norris jokes ever....
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May 30, 2023, 5:40 AM
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Chuck Norris doesn’t do push-ups. He pushes the world down.
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Orange Blooded [3338]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Joined: 1/3/11
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Two
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May 30, 2023, 5:47 AM
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Chuck Norris uses a live rattlesnake for a condom
And an Army one...
Chuck Norris Ranger rolls his kevlar.
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Freshman [-79]
TigerPulse: 66%
Posts: 4600
Joined: 12/21/21
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And Bruce Li supports the world with one arm while playing
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May 30, 2023, 10:36 AM
[ in reply to Re: Best Chuck Norris jokes ever.... ] |
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with Chucks wife’s jugs with the other hand. Chuck can’t do anything about it.
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Orange Blooded [3039]
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CU Guru [1129]
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Joined: 10/21/20
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Re: Best Chuck Norris jokes ever....
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May 30, 2023, 6:09 AM
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Brett Favre can get grow a football 50 yards, Chuck Norris can throw Brett Favre 50 yards
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Rock Defender [55]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Re: Best Chuck Norris jokes ever....
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May 30, 2023, 10:04 AM
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An asteroid did not kill the dinosaurs'.......Chuck did
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Freshman [-79]
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Joined: 12/21/21
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Then Bruce Li got in charge and everything was cool***
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May 30, 2023, 10:39 AM
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Freshman [-79]
TigerPulse: 66%
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Joined: 12/21/21
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Bruce Li can throw Chuck, the football, and the entire
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May 30, 2023, 10:38 AM
[ in reply to Re: Best Chuck Norris jokes ever.... ] |
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stadium further than Chuck can throw a football.
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Head Coach [767]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Joined: 10/26/00
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Re: Best Chuck Norris jokes ever....
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May 30, 2023, 6:12 AM
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Chuck Norris can touch MC Hammer
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Freshman [-79]
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Joined: 12/21/21
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See, and this is a problem. Chuck touches “this”
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May 30, 2023, 10:41 AM
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Bruce is too smart to do that.
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Head Coach [767]
TigerPulse: 100%
Posts: 522
Joined: 10/26/00
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Re: Best Chuck Norris jokes ever....
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May 30, 2023, 6:12 AM
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Chuck Norris has a bearskin rug. The bear isn’t dead, it’s just too afraid to move.
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CU Medallion [65000]
TigerPulse: 100%
Posts: 33167
Joined: 12/3/03
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^^^Leader in the Clubhouse?^^^
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May 30, 2023, 7:59 AM
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A lot of these are pretty good.
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Freshman [-79]
TigerPulse: 66%
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Orange Blooded [4760]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Joined: 9/29/15
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Re: Best Chuck Norris jokes ever....
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May 30, 2023, 6:29 AM
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Chuck Norris can tie one hand behind his back with one hand tied behind his back.
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Freshman [-79]
TigerPulse: 66%
Posts: 4600
Joined: 12/21/21
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Bruce can untie Chucks hands
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May 30, 2023, 10:43 AM
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Without ever touching him
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Hall of Famer [21722]
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Re: Best Chuck Norris jokes ever....
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May 30, 2023, 6:30 AM
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When Alexander Graham Bell finished inventing the telephone, he already had 5 missed calls from Chuck Norris.
~JKB
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Freshman [-79]
TigerPulse: 66%
Posts: 4600
Joined: 12/21/21
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He was calling Alex because Bruce told him to***
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May 30, 2023, 10:46 AM
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Legend [17880]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Joined: 12/24/96
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Re: Best Chuck Norris jokes ever....
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May 30, 2023, 7:09 AM
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Chuck Norris was once a man trapped in a woman's body, until he was born.
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Freshman [-79]
TigerPulse: 66%
Posts: 4600
Joined: 12/21/21
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Chuck has slept with more women than Wilt Chamberlin
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May 30, 2023, 10:45 AM
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Bruce bagged even more.. on one weekend in Aruba
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All-In [36207]
TigerPulse: 100%
Posts: 21509
Joined: 10/27/03
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COVID Had to Get Immunized Against Chuck Norris***
May 30, 2023, 7:29 AM
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Freshman [-79]
TigerPulse: 66%
Posts: 4600
Joined: 12/21/21
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Norris took a vaccine
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May 30, 2023, 10:48 AM
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invented by Bruce Li.
Little known fact - Bruce Li is a doctor just for fun. Works on rockets on his spare time as well. The word Mensa was created by Bruce, THATS how smart he is.
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Heisman Winner [108390]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Joined: 2/25/06
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Re: Best Chuck Norris jokes ever....
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May 30, 2023, 7:37 AM
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CU Medallion [56750]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Joined: 11/12/04
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Willy Korn?***
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May 30, 2023, 7:42 AM
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Heisman Winner [108390]
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Yep.***
May 30, 2023, 7:56 AM
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Freshman [-79]
TigerPulse: 66%
Posts: 4600
Joined: 12/21/21
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Bruce Li gave that kid his autograph ,
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May 30, 2023, 10:52 AM
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with Chucks bloody finger.
Is this the last one? I gotta get back to work at some point
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Oculus Spirit [76735]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Joined: 12/1/18
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Yes, that BMT isn't going to microwave itself, Stanley.***
May 30, 2023, 6:47 PM
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Freshman [-79]
TigerPulse: 66%
Posts: 4600
Joined: 12/21/21
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That kid is scared
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May 30, 2023, 10:50 AM
[ in reply to Re: Best Chuck Norris jokes ever.... ] |
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Because he sees Bruce Li taking the picture. Chuck is smiling, because Bruce told him, “say cheese or die, b!tch”
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Heisman Winner [108390]
TigerPulse: 100%
Posts: 64974
Joined: 2/25/06
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Bruce Lee died in 1973, so no he's not taking the picture...
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May 30, 2023, 11:18 AM
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of Willy Korn.
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110%er [5471]
TigerPulse: 100%
Posts: 2507
Joined: 11/13/10
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Re: Bruce Lee died in 1973, so no he's not taking the picture...
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May 30, 2023, 7:44 PM
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Did Chuck kill him?
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Freshman [-79]
TigerPulse: 66%
Posts: 4600
Joined: 12/21/21
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Chuck would have been dead long ago if Bruce LEE wanted to
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May 31, 2023, 2:46 PM
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kill him..
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Freshman [-79]
TigerPulse: 66%
Posts: 4600
Joined: 12/21/21
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Freshman [-79]
TigerPulse: 66%
Posts: 4600
Joined: 12/21/21
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All-Pro [695]
TigerPulse: 98%
Posts: 1440
Joined: 10/8/02
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There are no Chuck Norris jokes, only Chuck Norris facts.***
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May 30, 2023, 7:43 AM
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CU Guru [1669]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Joined: 11/20/07
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Re: Best Chuck Norris jokes ever....
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May 30, 2023, 7:46 AM
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Chuck Norris can cook minute rice in 30 seconds.
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Freshman [-79]
TigerPulse: 66%
Posts: 4600
Joined: 12/21/21
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Chuck Norris cooks for Bruce LEE
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May 31, 2023, 2:49 PM
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whatever the heck Bruce LEE wants.
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Head Coach [760]
TigerPulse: 100%
Posts: 549
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Re: Best Chuck Norris jokes ever....
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May 30, 2023, 8:25 AM
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Chuck Norris doesn’t flush the toilet- he scares the s### out of it.
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Orange Blooded [3102]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Joined: 3/31/15
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Re: Best Chuck Norris jokes ever....
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May 30, 2023, 8:44 AM
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Chuck Norris doesn’t sleep….. he waits.
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MVP [525]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Joined: 3/24/15
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Re: Best Chuck Norris jokes ever....
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May 30, 2023, 9:48 AM
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Chuck Norris once threw a punch.... And Hunter Renfrow caught it for a touchdown.
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Freshman [-79]
TigerPulse: 66%
Posts: 4600
Joined: 12/21/21
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Wait, so Hunter > Chuck?
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May 31, 2023, 2:39 PM
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I'm okay with that.
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Freshman [-79]
TigerPulse: 66%
Posts: 4600
Joined: 12/21/21
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Best Chuck joke of all time was that one where Chuck
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May 30, 2023, 10:30 AM
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thought he could beat up Bruce Li. Bruce Li on his living prime would have embarrassed Chuck.
Therefore I use Bruce Li in place of every Chuck Norris joke. Except for ones like,
“Chuck Norris and Bruce Li got into a fight til death match, once.. You only think Bruce Li is dead. He’s impersonating Chuck Norris as cover.”
I just made that up. I’ll be here all week, or until banned.
Go Tigers!
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Legend [18729]
TigerPulse: 100%
Posts: 5022
Joined: 7/15/13
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Re: Best Chuck joke of all time was that one where Chuck
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May 30, 2023, 10:45 AM
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At least if you going to say he was better, spell the man's name right.
https://www.britannica.com/biography/Bruce-Lee Bruce Lee | Biography, Martial Arts, Movies, Death, Son, & Facts Bruce Lee, Chinese name Li Jun Fan, (born November 27, 1940, San Francisco, California, U.S.—died July 20, 1973, Hong Kong), American-born film actor who was renowned for his martial arts prowess and who helped popularize martial arts movies in the 1970s. Lee was born in San Francisco, but he grew up in Hong Kong. He was introduced to the entertainment industry at an early age, as his father was an opera singer and part-time actor. The younger Lee began appearing in films as a child and was frequently cast as a juvenile delinquent or street urchin. As a teenager, he
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All-In [27289]
TigerPulse: 100%
Posts: 10088
Joined: 2/14/13
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Re: Best Chuck joke of all time was that one where Chuck
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May 30, 2023, 11:51 AM
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yeah...what a maroon
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Freshman [-79]
TigerPulse: 66%
Posts: 4600
Joined: 12/21/21
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WTFISWRONGWITHSOMEOFYOU?***
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May 31, 2023, 2:37 PM
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Hall of Famer [21722]
TigerPulse: 100%
Posts: 13534
Joined: 11/8/13
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Freshman [-79]
TigerPulse: 66%
Posts: 4600
Joined: 12/21/21
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I can do a mean Chuck Norris.
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May 31, 2023, 2:36 PM
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Wanna try me, punk? Do ya?!
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Freshman [-79]
TigerPulse: 66%
Posts: 4600
Joined: 12/21/21
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Freshman [-79]
TigerPulse: 66%
Posts: 4600
Joined: 12/21/21
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Legend [18729]
TigerPulse: 100%
Posts: 5022
Joined: 7/15/13
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Re: Best Chuck Norris jokes ever....
May 30, 2023, 10:42 AM
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Two Mormon boys knocked on Chuck's door once, Chuck recruited them to Special Forces and now the only missions they do are classified
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Freshman [-79]
TigerPulse: 66%
Posts: 4600
Joined: 12/21/21
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Did you make that up?***
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May 31, 2023, 2:38 PM
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Commissioner [981]
TigerPulse: 96%
Posts: 1308
Joined: 5/1/03
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Re: Best Chuck Norris jokes ever....
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May 30, 2023, 4:43 PM
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Chuck Norris once punched a cyclops between the eye
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Varsity [217]
TigerPulse: 98%
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Joined: 1/17/14
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You know why Chuck Norris is always on top?
May 30, 2023, 9:51 PM
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Cuz he don’t F up!
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110%er [5962]
TigerPulse: 100%
Posts: 3939
Joined: 1/10/04
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Chuck Norris got COVID
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May 30, 2023, 8:22 PM
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It had to quarantine for 10 days
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Freshman [-79]
TigerPulse: 66%
Posts: 4600
Joined: 12/21/21
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Yeah, but it came back. Bruce LEE would have wiped it out in
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May 31, 2023, 2:41 PM
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one try.
Is that better for the tight-arses?
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Standout [326]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Joined: 10/19/16
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Re: Yeah, but it came back. Bruce LEE would have wiped it out in
May 31, 2023, 6:46 PM
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Bruce Lee would squat to pee if Chuck told him to.
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Legend [18782]
TigerPulse: 100%
Posts: 12815
Joined: 11/30/95
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When Alexander Graham Bell invented the telephone...
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May 31, 2023, 6:51 PM
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....he had three missed calls from Chuck Norris.
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Legend [18782]
TigerPulse: 100%
Posts: 12815
Joined: 11/30/95
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Chuck Norris can strangle you with a cordless phone.***
May 31, 2023, 6:52 PM
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