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CU Medallion [64837]
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JuniorAdidas had his first flag football practice yesterday
Sep 15, 2017, 8:15 AM
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My internal comments are bracketed...
According to the pre-season email, there was a "miscommunication" and our team doesn't have a coach. [Well that's great.]
We show up and there is a butch looking woman coaching the team. [VVTF?]
A few minutes later, a man shows up and takes over. [Thank God!]
Turns out the man is a former college football player. [Oh helll yea.]
Turns out "former college football player" is a former CLUB level player. [Meh.]
Turns out former CLUB level player was actually a kicker. [Is it too late to bring back that butch woman?]
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110%er [5323]
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FLAG FOOTBALL?!?!!!?
Sep 15, 2017, 8:22 AM
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MAN I TELL YOU THATS WHATS WRONG WIT THESE KIDS THESE DAY IS THEY GET BABIED AND WUSSIFIED MAN THIS COUNTRY AINT GONNA BE ABLE TO STAY A SUPERPOWER WITH HOW SOFT AND CODDELD THESE SNOWFLAKES ARE THES DAYS I MEAN GOOD GOD MAN ITS RIDICULOUS WHAT ARE COOUNTRY HAS BECOME
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All-In [29076]
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I played flag football and I have more dickheat in my toe
Sep 15, 2017, 8:25 AM
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nail clippings than you'll ever have in your life.
BTW how's your preggers GF? She having cravings yet?
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CU Medallion [64837]
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Is she craving Wendy's?***
Sep 15, 2017, 8:33 AM
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All-In [29076]
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Whend
Sep 15, 2017, 8:35 AM
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eeeeezzz nuts are slapping against her chin?
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CU Medallion [64837]
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Re: FLAG FOOTBALL?!?!!!?
Sep 15, 2017, 8:48 AM
[ in reply to FLAG FOOTBALL?!?!!!? ] |
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I used to feel the same way, but things change when you become a father. You'll see what I mean in 9 months.
Congrats again, my man.
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Heisman Winner [135637]
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I'm guessing flag football is akin to coaching t-ball?
Sep 15, 2017, 8:36 AM
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It's really more about herding cats away from not eating dirt instead of any actual coaching, so no reason that YOU can't step up and do it. Just remember the golden rule of dealing with small children: A swat to the side of the head with a rolled up magazine and very firm 'NO' will be the only tool you need to maintain a Hitleresque control over your troops.
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CU Medallion [64837]
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Re: I'm guessing flag football is akin to coaching t-ball?
Sep 15, 2017, 8:46 AM
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I've been an assistant T-ball coach for 3 seasons with the Dixie Youth, and you're right. You just yell at kids all day and that's about it.
The flag football is with the Upward League which is affiliated with the Baptist Church... I didn't want to volunteer to coach without knowing what the expectation would be. Glad I didn't, because it is must more of a touchy-feely (I said Baptist church, not Catholic church... CS02) and less "redneck in your face coaching" like dixie youth.
Case in point: JuniorAdidas was cheering for one of his new teammates by yelling "get 'em Shrimpy!" (the kid was really small). The coach stepped in and made the kids shake hands and introduce themselves so they would know each others name... At Dixie Youth, the coaches would be calling the kids "Shrimpy".
I think I'm just going to sit back and enjoy this season from the sidelines and wait until he is old enough to play "County Ball".
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All-In [45047]
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Make sure it's a children's or sports magazine, you can't be
Sep 15, 2017, 8:47 AM
[ in reply to I'm guessing flag football is akin to coaching t-ball? ] |
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hitting kids upside the head with your Hustlers. I mean you can, if you want to have to register as a sects offender.
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Heisman Winner [135637]
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Exactly.
Sep 15, 2017, 9:15 AM
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But...it needs to be a heavy enough magazine to get the point across. I would suggest rolling up two Sports Illustrated issues together if need be.
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All-In [45047]
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Two would definitely work but if he wants to be lazy he
Sep 15, 2017, 9:24 AM
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could just get one of those double issues and only have to carry one.
I'm just assuming he's lazy because he types lazy like some people in here type fat.
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Heisman Winner [135637]
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Ah.
Sep 15, 2017, 9:26 AM
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Swimsuit issue. Helps keep them motivated for football AND helps keep them heterosexual.
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CU Guru [1701]
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TIL that ryanadidas is a beta dad
Sep 15, 2017, 8:48 AM
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who lets his son play flag football
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CU Medallion [64837]
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TIL that girls soccer is more masculine than flag football***
Sep 15, 2017, 8:49 AM
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CU Guru [1701]
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We have concussions and ACL tears
Sep 15, 2017, 8:50 AM
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you got juice boxes
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CU Medallion [64837]
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Yall don't get juice boxes?***
Sep 15, 2017, 8:52 AM
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All-TigerNet [12270]
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so flag football has replaced little league football?
Sep 15, 2017, 8:52 AM
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the wussification of merica. how are these young men going to expel all that pent up energy without knockin some helmets?
of course they may still have their knees and ankles in decent shape when they're my age.
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CU Medallion [64837]
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Re: so flag football has replaced little league football?
Sep 15, 2017, 8:55 AM
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I feel like I need to 'splain myself:
My son is 6. Yes they tackle football for chirren, but it starts at age 8. This is just a stop-gap until "real football" starts in a few years.
DixieVindicator
sav82tiger
SC146
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Heisman Winner [135637]
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Thanks for explaining it to us, young lady.
Sep 15, 2017, 9:21 AM
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Maybe your husband could go out and start a 6 year old tackle league?
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CU Medallion [64837]
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Re: Thanks for explaining it to us, young lady.
Sep 15, 2017, 9:38 AM
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Heisman Winner [135637]
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^^^THIS IS HOW YOU DO IT, PEOPLE^^^
Sep 15, 2017, 9:41 AM
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Offering free sausage as a way of showing agreement, I mean.
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Oculus Spirit [93702]
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I'm ok with flag football.
Sep 15, 2017, 9:49 AM
[ in reply to so flag football has replaced little league football? ] |
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I like the fact that more kids can participate due to needing much less equipment. Many parents don't like their kids knocking heads. I'm all for parents being able to managing their kids how the please and this seems like a good medium and better than not playing at all.
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Oculus Spirit [93702]
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Did somebody mention ### football?***
Sep 15, 2017, 9:50 AM
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Hall of Famer [21948]
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SRS Follow up
Sep 15, 2017, 9:56 AM
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Is your son playing flag football because his head hasn't fully developed to be able to knock the motherfuckingshit out of some Hillary voting family's little ####? (aka younger than minimum age)
Or are his parents afraid a little contact will impeded his intellectual growth after watching Will Smith's Concussion movie and the Dateline series blasting the only southern tradition we got left? (aka of age, but wussification of Murica)
Let the record state, I played football at the little league, middle school, high school, and collegiate levels (not kicker) and received an IE (imaginary engineering) degree and am quite possibly the smartest #### in the Jounge. HTH
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CU Medallion [64837]
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Re: SRS Follow up
Sep 15, 2017, 11:36 AM
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Dearest dawghater23,
Junior is playing flag football because it is the only option for his age (6yrs). He has two years of this until he is old enough to knock heads. Wife and I will encourage him to play "real football" when he gets old enough (8yrs) if he still wants to play.
If he would rather play basketball, then cool. If he'd rather play baseball, then fine (I hate baseball). If he'd rather dance/play violin/play with barbie's, then... well... let's just hope that doesn't happen.
I didn't watch Will Smith's movie. I played a wee bit of fooseball, myself. I didn't start playing organized ball until high school and wish that I would have started younger. Not because I "coulda been really good", but because I enjoyed the heck out of it.
I've banged my head way harder in bar-fights and doing construction than I ever did playing fooseball.
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CU Medallion [64837]
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Re: SRS Follow up
Sep 15, 2017, 11:43 AM
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Actually, as a follow up:
I had two really nasty concussions playing fooseball. I was out of school for a week puking with migrains and the whole 9 yards.
Guess what, I'm no more homicidal/suicidal than I would have been otherwise and I managed to get a ME degree and hold down a pretty good job.
That being said, call me what you want, but if my son started having some serious brain issues from repetitive concussions, I'd pull him out of fooseball. It just ain't worth it. ...I don't expect that to happen playing pee-wee...
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50
