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Ultimate Tiger [35931]
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So a friend of RB tells me his wife tried on a dress that she used to wear in
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Aug 15, 2025, 12:28 PM
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college before going out on a dinner date, and asked him "Does this dress make me look fat?"
Now, I believe that honesty is the best policy in a relationship. With the exception of this particular instance. But I digress. I gave him the following options, each with its own consequences:
1) "I'm feeling depressed, I'd rather not go out for dinner"
2) "Well, not too much. It doesn't matter what you put on, your weight is your weight"
3) "Wow, I haven't seen that dress in ages....you look great. I can't wait to go out for dinner" (throws up in mouth).
4) "You know, you're aging really gracefully. Those botox treatments are really paying off"
So, which option?
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Game Day Hero [4591]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Re: So a friend of RB tells me his wife tried on a dress that she used to wear in
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Aug 15, 2025, 12:30 PM
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They already know the dress makes them look fat because they are fat.
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Paw Master [16158]
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Re: So a friend of RB tells me his wife tried on a dress that she used to wear in
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Aug 15, 2025, 12:36 PM
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Or respond: "Oh crap, I gotta feed the dogs before we go to dinner!", then run out the room. And before she can come back for a follow-up, run outside hollering, "I'm gonna start the car and get the AC on!". Then you just have to sit there until she gets in car, it's too late to worry about the dress then.
Deflection is best philosophy!
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All-In [11072]
TigerPulse: 100%
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A sweet lie is a giftuntil the wrapping comes off.
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Aug 15, 2025, 12:37 PM
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you've got to go with : Wow, I haven't seen that dress in ages....you look great. I can't wait to go out for dinner
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Oculus Spirit [43626]
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Re: So a friend of RB tells me his wife tried on a dress that she used to wear in
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Aug 15, 2025, 12:40 PM
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#### baby you look good, let me take that dress off you and let’s get it on. That’s what I would say
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Heisman Winner [87517]
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^^overheard at Bob and FM's house^^
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Aug 15, 2025, 12:56 PM
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.
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Oculus Spirit [43626]
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I won't ask you how you heard it, but I will ask you
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Aug 15, 2025, 1:05 PM
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who said that to whom. Or is it whom said that to who, or who said that to who, or whom said that to whom. I forget.
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Heisman Winner [87517]
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How am I supposed to know?
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Aug 15, 2025, 1:09 PM
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I'm not a lip reader.
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Oculus Spirit [43626]
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I wasn't nauseous until you brought
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Aug 15, 2025, 1:57 PM
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labia into the conversation
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Heisman Winner [87517]
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Rival Killer [2609]
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Ultimate Tiger [35931]
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Heisman Winner [83913]
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Joined: 2019
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Paw Master [16670]
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Re: So a friend of RB tells me his wife tried on a dress that she used to wear in
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Aug 15, 2025, 1:08 PM
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Flip it around:
No Honey...your a$$ makes that dress look small.
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Ultimate Tiger [35931]
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Re: So a friend of RB tells me his wife tried on a dress that she used to wear in
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Aug 15, 2025, 1:14 PM
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Rival Killer [2609]
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Re: So a friend of RB tells me his wife tried on a dress that she used to wear in
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Aug 15, 2025, 1:27 PM
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The mere idea of my wife putting on a dress gives me the ohoh feeling in my nono spot. She rarely wears anything but jeans. 😔
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Legend [6712]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Re: So a friend of RB tells me his wife tried on a dress that she used to wear in
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Aug 15, 2025, 1:33 PM
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How about, “Honey you make that Dress look Phat”.
Be sure to spell the last word then let her figure it out.
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All-TigerNet [5940]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Re: So a friend of RB tells me his wife tried on a dress that she used to wear in
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Aug 15, 2025, 2:12 PM
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Oh, honey...it's not the dress that makes you look fat.
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Clemson Conqueror [11146]
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Re: So a friend of RB tells me his wife tried on a dress that she used to wear in
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Aug 15, 2025, 2:17 PM
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That story reminds me that my wife can wear my shirts anytime she wants, but when I put on one of her dresses, suddenly "we need to talk."
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Oculus Spirit [43626]
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Re: So a friend of RB tells me his wife tried on a dress that she used to wear in
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Aug 15, 2025, 2:31 PM
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Hypocritical, that's what that is. Wear her undergarments and she'll probably call you a pervert
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Valley Legend [13080]
TigerPulse: 100%
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Neither of Those Options Work
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Aug 15, 2025, 3:11 PM
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Instead, try pulling an Urban Myer and faking a heart attack at that very moment. Either that, or realize that regardless of what answer you provide, you're likely still going to end up a loser and tell the lady that she's fat. However, a smart person would say that they want to take their significant other to the mall for a new outfit.
Hope that helps.
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Paw Warrior [4962]
TigerPulse: 100%
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HOLD UP FAM
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Aug 15, 2025, 3:17 PM
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Why is she speaking unless spoken to anyway?
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Heisman Winner [83913]
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Re: So a friend of RB tells me his wife tried on a dress that she used to wear in
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Aug 15, 2025, 3:45 PM
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I would just fake a heart attack, and get carried away by ambulance.
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Campus Hero [13396]
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Re: So a friend of RB tells me his wife tried on a dress that she used to wear in
Aug 15, 2025, 5:58 PM
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5). Oh rats. This weekend is one that you’ve reserved for your boyfriend.
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Oculus Spirit [42675]
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Re: So a friend of RB tells me his wife tried on a dress that she used to wear in
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Aug 15, 2025, 7:02 PM
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I’m sorry, I can’t hear you.
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