Replies: 40
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Legend [16378]
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SEASON OPENER LIMERICKS (includes Gamecock bashing)
Aug 27, 2018, 6:29 AM
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Just do what good Furman fans do - Put purple stuff all over you. Our Tigers can help! You might cry and yelp, But bruises will look purple, too.
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Legend [16378]
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Re: SEASON OPENER LIMERICKS
Aug 27, 2018, 6:31 AM
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You Paladin folks are right fine, And many are great friends of mine, But football’s our thing - The proof’s in the ring. Just focus on chilling your wine.
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Legend [16378]
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Re: SEASON OPENER LIMERICKS
Aug 27, 2018, 6:32 AM
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You erudite academicians Are not above moral suspicions. Your hats say “F U” - That’s edgy, it’s true. Y’all friends with those c0ck-obsessed chickens??
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Legend [16378]
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Re: SEASON OPENER LIMERICKS
Aug 27, 2018, 7:01 AM
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The Upstate community sings - This game and the spirit it brings Stirs goodwill, not bad. But, y’all, don’t get mad When Dex starts to do Big Dex things.
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CU Guru [1308]
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Re: SEASON OPENER LIMERICKS
Aug 27, 2018, 7:47 AM
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There once was a man from McNoot Who had warts on the end of his, Oh um My bad, Different subject
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CU Medallion [53008]
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The quality of those limericks
Aug 27, 2018, 7:53 AM
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went south very quickly
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Legend [16378]
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Re: The quality of those limericks
Aug 27, 2018, 9:09 AM
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2k, there is not quite enough High drama this week, so it’s tough To maintain the snarky, Poetic malarkey I’m used to, so let’s see your stuff!
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Legend [16378]
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Re: SEASON OPENER LIMERICKS
Aug 27, 2018, 9:04 AM
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So Furman’s that neighborhood kid Who, when we played football, just hid. We fin’lly convinced him, But “over-intensed” him - He played, but does not wish he did.
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Legend [16378]
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Re: SEASON OPENER LIMERICKS
Aug 27, 2018, 9:50 AM
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Hey, Furman might do us a favor. We get ‘em to falter and waver And give up quick scores? This opens the doors For offense with Lawrencine flavor!
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Legend [16378]
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Re: SEASON OPENER LIMERICKS
Aug 27, 2018, 11:29 AM
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I’ll try not to look so amused, But might have to just be excused - I’m spewing my drink! Do y’all really think That Furman can hang?? I’m confused.
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Legend [16378]
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Re: SEASON OPENER LIMERICKS (includes Gamecock bashing)
Aug 27, 2018, 11:36 AM
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At Willy B, liquor’s a-flowin, But grass has just not been a-growin’. They’ll peck up the earth, Re-sod it with turf, Then get back to losin’ and crowin’.
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Legend [16378]
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Re: SEASON OPENER LIMERICKS (includes Gamecock bashing)
Aug 27, 2018, 12:17 PM
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It’s hard to domesticate birds - They don’t respond well to wise words. They’ve trashed their own yard, And fixing it’s hard - At least they feed grass with their turds.
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Legend [16378]
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Re: SEASON OPENER LIMERICKS (includes Gamecock bashing)
Aug 27, 2018, 12:21 PM
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The Paladin faithful are buzzin’! Each purpled-out brother and cousin Is touchdown-obsessed, But they’ll be depressed Once Etienne scores a few dozen.
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Legend [16378]
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Re: SEASON OPENER LIMERICKS (includes Gamecock bashing)
Aug 27, 2018, 4:24 PM
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The finest D-line in the land Will leave Furman nowhere to stand. They’ll snap the durn ball, Run into a wall, And see they’re completely outmanned.
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CU Guru [1283]
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Re: SEASON OPENER LIMERICKS (includes Gamecock bashing)
Aug 27, 2018, 6:49 PM
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These are clever and amusing-thank you! The last one may be my fave, although I liked the reply to 21, too.
I could not, even given a year and an incentive of a million dollars, come up with even one limerick.
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Legend [16378]
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Re: SEASON OPENER LIMERICKS (includes Gamecock bashing)
Aug 27, 2018, 7:38 PM
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Thanks man! High brow trash talk is funny - I try to be biting and punny. If you’re offered pay, I’ll write ‘em all day, As long as you share half the money.
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Legend [16378]
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Re: SEASON OPENER LIMERICKS (includes Gamecock bashing)
Aug 27, 2018, 7:20 PM
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Columbia’s famously hot, But their University’s not. They failed to foresee There might need to be Some grass in their big yard-bird lot.
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CU Guru [1283]
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Re: SEASON OPENER LIMERICKS (includes Gamecock bashing)
Aug 27, 2018, 8:58 PM
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What would you say to a couple (of Tiger fans) who are celebrating their 65th anniversary?
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Legend [16378]
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Joined: 2/21/06
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Re: SEASON OPENER LIMERICKS (includes Gamecock bashing)
Aug 30, 2018, 7:55 PM
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Some might say your best days were olden, But years, for these Tigers, embolden A Joy that grows bigger With wisdom, with vigor - Your legacy truly shines golden.
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Legend [16378]
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Scout Team [159]
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Re: SEASON OPENER LIMERICKS (includes Gamecock bashing)
Aug 27, 2018, 9:21 PM
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Roses are orange Violets are purple...
GO TIGERS!!!
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CU Medallion [53830]
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......
Aug 27, 2018, 9:59 PM
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I use to run with a coot from Powdersville But I hurt my knee when we ran up a hill And for now all I can do is take a slow walk And listen to the Gamecock crow and sqwawk Until this fall when we collect the bill the day our Tigers run down THE HILL
Spud
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Legend [16378]
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Re: SEASON OPENER LIMERICKS (includes Gamecock bashing)
Aug 28, 2018, 8:17 AM
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I hope that when Saturday comes, The Coots can stop flapping their gums For just enough time To water and lyme Their grass, ‘fore it’s covered with bums.
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Legend [16378]
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Re: SEASON OPENER LIMERICKS (includes Gamecock bashing)
Aug 28, 2018, 3:04 PM
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Somebody TD’d my OP. I wonder which one it might be - A Paladin lurker, A Dawg mischief-worker, Or Coot with an IQ of 3?
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Legend [16378]
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Re: SEASON OPENER LIMERICKS (includes Gamecock bashing)
Aug 28, 2018, 3:50 PM
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A guy in a dark purple cardi I met at a charity party Said, “Clemson alum?” I nod. He says, “Bum.” I said, “See ya Saturday, smarty.”
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Legend [16378]
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Re: SEASON OPENER LIMERICKS (includes Gamecock bashing)
Aug 28, 2018, 6:57 PM
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For grass, which calamity’s worse? The fact that Coots live with a curse, Or Jay-Z upon it A-spittin’ the vomit Of profane, irreverent verse?
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Orange Blooded [3244]
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Re: SEASON OPENER LIMERICKS (includes Gamecock bashing)
Aug 28, 2018, 7:34 PM
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The talent gap’s quite a distortion But Furman will make a small fortune. The price they must pay For such a payday? A beat down of epic proportions!!
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Starter [383]
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Re: SEASON OPENER LIMERICKS (includes Gamecock bashing)
Aug 28, 2018, 7:37 PM
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Oooh nice
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Legend [16378]
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Re: SEASON OPENER LIMERICKS (includes Gamecock bashing)
Aug 29, 2018, 6:32 AM
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Our stable of talent will deepen - QBs will leave defenses weepin’. If I may be bold, though, The sight to behold, yo, Is Tee Higgins’ vertical leapin’.
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Legend [16378]
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Re: SEASON OPENER LIMERICKS (includes Gamecock bashing)
Aug 29, 2018, 2:20 PM
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Take note, lest the point be forgotten, That once the ref’s whistlin’ and spottin’ Our stifling D Your nightmare shall be - We’ll look like a fire in the cotton.
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Legend [16378]
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Re: SEASON OPENER LIMERICKS (includes Gamecock bashing)
Aug 30, 2018, 7:12 PM
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It looks like there might be some weathers This first of the year’s get-togethers, But you’ve never seen A downpour as mean As cryin’ when Dex stomps yer nethers.
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Legend [16378]
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Re: SEASON OPENER LIMERICKS (includes Gamecock bashing)
Aug 31, 2018, 6:08 AM
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Hey Coot - that new scr!pt on your head? It’s typic’lly not black and red. It’s Chapel Hill’s thing! Some Heels might just bring Trademark allegations, they said.
Apparently “scr ipt” is on the list of censored words?
Message was edited by: bdrechs®
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Legend [16378]
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Re: SEASON OPENER LIMERICKS (includes Gamecock bashing)
Aug 31, 2018, 6:12 AM
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Then how should we make the game fair? Put in the young buck with the hair? He’s not gonna start, But he’ll rip apart Your defense when KB’s not there!
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Commissioner [907]
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Re: SEASON OPENER LIMERICKS (includes Gamecock bashing)
Aug 31, 2018, 7:47 AM
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Wilkins, Lawrence and Bryant With Cle-missle will be defiant Both QB's will toss TD's to Higgins and Ross And the Tiger's score will be giant
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Rock Defender [70]
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Re: SEASON OPENER LIMERICKS (includes Gamecock bashing)
Aug 31, 2018, 8:21 AM
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Furman's landscaping is surely top notch But their fans won't want to watch This saturday's game Clemson is bringing the pain and the Paladins will be seeing spots
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Legend [16378]
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Re: SEASON OPENER LIMERICKS (includes Gamecock bashing)
Aug 31, 2018, 2:00 PM
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The home scoreboard’s initiation Won’t lack any bright excitation. The board will get rung up And might just get hung up While feeling a burning sensation!
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Legend [16378]
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Re: SEASON OPENER LIMERICKS (includes Gamecock bashing)
Aug 31, 2018, 4:17 PM
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Tailgaters are flooding the area! Excitement’s so high it would scare ya! This Tigertown air’s The best anywheres. Try tellin’ us diff’rent - I dare ya.
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Legend [16378]
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Re: SEASON OPENER LIMERICKS (includes Gamecock bashing)
Aug 31, 2018, 5:50 PM
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Although Furman fans are enthused, Their players are ‘bout to get used As poster statistics For human ballistics. They’re gonna get straight-up abused.
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Legend [16378]
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Re: SEASON OPENER LIMERICKS (includes Gamecock bashing)
Aug 31, 2018, 8:43 PM
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I’ll tell you what tingles my giblets - The score digits might reach the triplets! The Tigers will find That Furman’s D-line Is basic’lly morsel-sized niblets.
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Legend [16378]
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Re: SEASON OPENER LIMERICKS (includes Gamecock bashing)
Sep 1, 2018, 8:18 AM
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The fervor and pride is astounding! With Cadence Counts loud and resounding, All Clemson gets wound up! The pressure’s been bound up - Now Paladins get the first pounding!
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Legend [16378]
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Re: SEASON OPENER LIMERICKS (includes Gamecock bashing)
Sep 1, 2018, 9:03 AM
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The deafening roar of the fans, The “pop” when our D wrecks their plans, And Tiger Band’s tunes - It’s been many moons! Let’s hear that sweet music again!
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Replies: 40
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