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Oculus Spirit [79429]
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In today's "Mid 30's man yells at clouds" topic, has anyone else noticed this
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Mar 13, 2024, 12:33 PM
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trend? My wife has a long time friend "getting married" this summer. They're getting ready to embark on the bachelorette party soon, this comes right before we're getting ready to take our big boat vacation that I've been waiting 6 years to go on now. I have no doubt the costs associated with this bachelorette party will infringe on our boat vacation, and I'm not really happy about it.
Under normal circumstances I'd be a little peeved but suck it up and say have fun. However, the couple getting married has been married for almost 2 years now. They have conceived and had a child together. They have lived together for maybe 4 years now? This is the third one of her friends that has done this, gotten married years in advance, cohabitated, and had children(well only 2 of them had children, third was childless at the time of the wedding).
I cannot wrap my head around how fuckking asinine this whole charade is. Isn't all of this for people who are just starting off? Are bachelor/bachelorette parties even a thing once you hit a certain age? Doesn't seem like they should be, who has time for all of that unless you've got a trust fund or something?
Very possible I have made a similar post in the past lamenting the same thing, so forgive me if a dupe.
#17
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All-In [43774]
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Wait. Let me see if I understand. Dude and chick date and possibly
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Mar 13, 2024, 12:49 PM
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live together for 2 yrs.
Then get married.
Then have a kid.
Then, like a few years AFTER getting married they are doing a bachelorette party and wedding?
In this order?
F no I've never heard of that. What in the actual F? F those MFs. Sounds like some instagram BS to me.
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Oculus Spirit [79429]
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Correct, in once instance baby came right before marriage but in all
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Mar 13, 2024, 12:54 PM
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cases wedding and bachelorette party came years after both actually marriage and birth of baby. I feel like I'm taking crazy pills because nobody seems to think this is as ridiculous as I do.
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All-In [27149]
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That's a girls trip, not a bachelorette party.
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Mar 13, 2024, 12:57 PM
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And if that hag tried to be center of attention I'd shave her head.
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Heisman Winner [105622]
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It's a girls trip that she wants her friends to pay for
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Mar 13, 2024, 1:02 PM
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That is the key here
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Oculus Spirit [76341]
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Re: It's a girls trip that she wants her friends to pay for
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Mar 13, 2024, 2:00 PM
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All-In [43774]
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Yep, and as a result her poor hubby will be at home planting
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Mar 13, 2024, 3:04 PM
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trees and flowers for another $1k instead of giving a different guy $30k to do it because he no longer can afford to do so.
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Oculus Spirit [79429]
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I could see a girls trip, I could see a "wedding" where people got together
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Mar 13, 2024, 1:03 PM
[ in reply to That's a girls trip, not a bachelorette party. ] |
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and celebrated the couple or whatever....I cannot see doing both. Aside from that, I wouldn't really consider it a girls trip because most of the women involve know the "bride" independently....In other words, it's not one big friend group going on this trip. Some are work friends of the "bride", some childhood friends, some friends from college, etc. I would say most of them only know 1 or 2 people going counting the "bride".
The whole thing just feels forced and unnecessary, but again this is apparently a thing now.
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110%er [9101]
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Oculus Spirit [79429]
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I am assuming so, maybe we'll just re-gift a toy for their kid lol***
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Mar 13, 2024, 1:48 PM
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All-In [42196]
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Yeah, that's a no from me, dawg
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Mar 13, 2024, 12:49 PM
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1. A no because I haven't seen it because I've moved past that demographic.
2. And a no because that sounds really stupid. Sounds like someone is making up an excuse to make people pay for a party/trip for you.
I think it's perfectly fine for your wife to use your boat trip and the cost as an excuse not to attend this silliness.
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Oculus Spirit [79429]
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Added bonus, bachelorette party is ~ 9 hours away from where any of them
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Mar 13, 2024, 12:57 PM
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live and is a 5 day trip. I might be an assshole, but I don't think it's outrageous to say nah something like that we can do as a family or not at all. Do I get to take a 5 day trip to the Keys by myself later? No, I don't, and even if I did I'd feel like a pretty big dbag taking a trip like that and not bringing my family.
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All-In [43774]
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Ok, this info peeled back the proverbial onion.
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Mar 13, 2024, 1:14 PM
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Bish wants to go on a trip. In fact, she's entitled to one. Just ask her.
Marching orders to wife:
Call that self-absorbed entitled POS and say this exactly:
Brittany-
Thank you again for the offer to join your bachelorette party in Gulf Shores. After giving it more thought, there is simply no way I can make it. I have a toddler and a hubby that works, so child care will be nearly impossible for that period of time. It's also nearly impossible for me to break away from work for a week, attend our annual family vacation, AND take time off around the holidays to visit with extended family. Even if I COULD find childcare, unfortunately I'd be sacrificing more with my family than I'd be comfortable doing so. Also with the uncertainty in the economy, Lakebum isn't forcasting a super rosy finish to the year so it would be prudent for us to hang on to our greenbacks for now, nomesayin? Anyhoo, ya'll have a great trip and KNOW I'll be waiting to see the pigs on IG. YA'LL GIRLS GONE LOOK SOOOOOO PRETTY I JUST KNOW YOU ARE!
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Oculus Spirit [79429]
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Thanks, I copy and pasted this and took the liberty to go ahead and send
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Mar 13, 2024, 1:36 PM
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it to the already married bride. I really like the "we're looking at being poor by the end of the year" aspect you threw in there, I think it helps put in perspective how silly this nonsense is and maybe she'll feel guilty.
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All-In [42196]
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Well, depends on how you want to play this
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Mar 13, 2024, 1:22 PM
[ in reply to Added bonus, bachelorette party is ~ 9 hours away from where any of them ] |
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Is your wife really, really wanting to go and this is a debate?
If that's the case, IMO, and if you can afford it, take the L on this and bank for bros trip collateral later on. Don't feel like a dbag. It's okay to get away for yourself once in a while.
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Oculus Spirit [79429]
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I think she's 50/50, not really a debate yet just a discussion
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Mar 13, 2024, 1:31 PM
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If it were any other time it would be OK...Problem is, we're turning around and taking the boat to the coast. We aren't planning on running to the sandbar every day and back, this trip will be covering hundreds of miles by boat. We got a good deal on the place we're renting, but I am assuming I'll be paying ~ $400 for a tank of gas and going through 3-4 tanks. Then you've got restaurant bills, etc. and I don't anticipate it being a cheap trip.
But again, we've waited 6 years to take this trip, and it really chaps my asss this #### comes up right before we're about to go on it.
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All-In [27149]
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This is the aspect that is most infuriating, beyond the "LOOK AT ME" nature
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Mar 13, 2024, 2:18 PM
[ in reply to Added bonus, bachelorette party is ~ 9 hours away from where any of them ] |
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of a "bachelorette party" several years post marriage. What married person with kids has the time/money to take nearly a week off to go party? I feel guilty about even a guy's weekend because of the impact on my wife. And even beyond how my wife would feel about it, there is no way I would consider burning a week of PTO and however much cash to do something without her and the kid. That is some selfish, sociopathic behavior on the part of "The Bride," and the last thing I would want to do is spend any amount of time in close contact with such a person. I would encourage your wife to intentional burn that bridge and not spare even an ounce of gasoline in doing so; maybe even bring out the C4 just to make sure it's gone.
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Oculus Spirit [79429]
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That's what I don't get, who even has time for all of this?
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Mar 13, 2024, 3:21 PM
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It sorta makes sense when you're in your 20's and childless, but now? I genuinely can't think of something that would be lower on my priority list. That said, the "bride" is fairly nice, so I'm wondering if this isn't some of her yuppy friends organizing this whole ordeal.
Either way it all feels like a huge ask, everyone involved is 10+ years out of college so I'm struggling to understand who would even want to do all of this? I've got young kids, we can barely make time to go out to each, much less all of this ####.
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All-In [42907]
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Re: In today's "Mid 30's man yells at clouds" topic, has anyone else noticed this
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Mar 13, 2024, 12:53 PM
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Oculus Spirit [79429]
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Re: In today's "Mid 30's man yells at clouds" topic, has anyone else noticed this
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Mar 13, 2024, 12:58 PM
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All-TigerNet [11640]
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Laaaaaaaaaaame...
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Mar 13, 2024, 12:59 PM
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Why not just hit the trifecta and have a joint bachelor/bachelorette party where everyone goes to the same place.
Kids these days are ####### losers.
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Heisman Winner [105622]
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This is the first time in my life I have ever heard of such
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Mar 13, 2024, 1:00 PM
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fuckery. If your wife is #ALLIN though, gonna be tough to do much else but complain on TNET. That's what I would do.
And I hate this other couple for you.
#Solidarity
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Oculus Spirit [79429]
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She doesn't really want to go I don't think, but feels pressure since
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Mar 13, 2024, 1:08 PM
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the "bride" did so much for her blah blah blah. We've also paid for the deposit on the house....because of course it had to be a beachfront house and not hotel rooms or something.
Personally, I don't think she can be away from the kids for that long since we'll be turning around and heading to the coast within a few days of her getting back. That said, I've still already spent money on this trip, will have to attend the wedding, and as far as I know I am not getting a BJ for any of this.
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All-In [27149]
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tell your wife to cut her losses with the deposit.
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Mar 13, 2024, 2:22 PM
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She can tell the "Bride" it's a gift to help her have a good time, but she is not able to attend.
Or burn the bridge by taking her to small claims court to get the deposit back.
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Hall of Famer [21940]
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Oculus Spirit [79429]
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Sheet, you know how much cool stuff I could have had if I woulda stayed
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Mar 13, 2024, 3:38 PM
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single? That ship has kind of sailed. We've known each other for a long time though, she's not going to pull any shenanigans.
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All-In [42196]
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CU Medallion [64837]
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Oh Lord.
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Mar 13, 2024, 1:02 PM
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There's a certain sub-culture of women (or should I say girls, since they are hardly adults) that feel entitled to take trips like that and do this sort of horse crap.
My wife is on the fringe of a few of these friend groups, and usually passes. She's done it maybe once or twice.
I don't complain much because she doesn't pitch a fit when I want to bro-out and hit up some jam band concerts with the bros, or go fishing, or really do whatever the F I want to.
It's a little silly, though.
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Oculus Spirit [79429]
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Something has to change or it's really going to be in a guys best interest
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Mar 13, 2024, 1:09 PM
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to be gay. I work with a lot of older dudes, and they don't seem to recall this level of high maintenance even 10 years ago.
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CU Medallion [64837]
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Any of those older guys looking for a young teddy bear?***
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Mar 13, 2024, 1:17 PM
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Oculus Spirit [79429]
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Maybe, they're about at the age where their wives are hitting menopause***
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Mar 13, 2024, 1:23 PM
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Oculus Spirit [85339]
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My wife had 5 different roommates in college
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Mar 13, 2024, 1:02 PM
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She and 1 other are the only ones to get married. The other 4 are 36 years old, 2 are def Vs, another maybe just lost the V in the last few months.
I don't think this helps at all, but no....never heard of that.
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All-In [43774]
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YYYYOOOOOOOOOOO
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Mar 13, 2024, 1:08 PM
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Pigs of Vs?
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CU Medallion [64837]
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Oculus Spirit [85339]
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Hid faces to protect the innocent
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Mar 13, 2024, 1:16 PM
[ in reply to YYYYOOOOOOOOOOO ] |
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All-In [42907]
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No dikbut? Related question, if they had had dikbut would that still count as V?***
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Mar 13, 2024, 1:19 PM
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Oculus Spirit [85339]
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Sorry to let you down...was in a rush
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Mar 13, 2024, 1:21 PM
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I think so.
So if a gal has a "friend" sort of like ryanadidas® has a "friend". Is she still a V?
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CU Medallion [64837]
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don't bring me into this.***
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Mar 13, 2024, 1:22 PM
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All-In [28416]
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this could be fun.
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Mar 13, 2024, 2:45 PM
[ in reply to Hid faces to protect the innocent ] |
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please draw my penor approaching cautiously and carrying a bucket of kfc
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110%er [7004]
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Some 20s/30s Women are totally detached from reality.
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Mar 13, 2024, 1:38 PM
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Is the “bride” from a wealthy family? That seems to make it worse, from what I have seen.
I thought you were saying this couple had lived together, had a kid, and were about to get married. Even that could be a bit much. This is just nuts.
My wife and her friends will take each other out for birthdays. Normally, its 3 women splitting a $30 bill for the birthday girl at a decent restaurant. One woman always, and I mean always, picks the most expensive place in town and leaves the other women paying well over $120 each. None will tell her that they resent it.
A younger coworker was recently invited to a bachelorette party in Paris! My youngest sister has been to two where they rented a mansion and had a private chef for the weekend. Neither my sister nor coworker are well off. It is stupid.
I blame instagram And women’s general reluctance to tell someone to F off when They are this out of line.
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Oculus Spirit [79429]
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I think this is a case of middle class women wanting to pretend they're
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Mar 13, 2024, 1:51 PM
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affluent influencers or something. Completely agree with you on everything else, I would fuggin hate to be dating in this climate. Seems like you could drop $1k on dinner for some of these chicks and that wouldn't be enough.
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Hall of Famer [24105]
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Re: In today's "Mid 30's man yells at clouds" topic, has anyone else noticed this
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Mar 13, 2024, 2:21 PM
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If I were Millennial or younger, I probably would have married a Mexican or South American woman. This sounds like some straight up young gringo chic BS ryecheer. My guess is half of them speak Valley Girl and have never stepped foot in California.
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CU Medallion [58424]
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The whole marriage/bachelorette thing is absurd.
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Mar 13, 2024, 3:18 PM
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A few years back oldest daughter was still in grad school, working part time in a restaurant so as not to be comletely flatass broke. One of her oldest friends got engaged, and announced she was having a bachelorette party for all of her "besties", which came to about 20+ girls. The party was 5 days in NYC with events at different bars and restaurants and venues every night and excursions every day. All of her besties had to pony up $$$ for plane tickets, lodging in NYC, different outfits for all of the different events, plus gifts and such for the bride-to-be. My daughter saved up enough to go, but could not afford to attend every single silly-ass planned function. It was thousands of dollars .... for what? !%@$#
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Oculus Spirit [79429]
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It's money up a hogs a$$, as my grandfather would say
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Mar 13, 2024, 3:27 PM
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I do get the sense there's a lot of these girls still on daddies payroll well into their 30's even when they're married. Otherwise I'm not sure how your husband is an engineer and you sell Scentsy while taking 7-8 major vacations every year.
I will do my part and not raise my daughter to be like this.
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Hall of Famer [21940]
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is it even a bachelorette party
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Mar 13, 2024, 3:27 PM
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if they're not coming to Nashville?
I mean, my wife went on a girls trip, as I documented here. Just call it that...definitely not a bachelorette party
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Orange Blooded [3719]
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OK, couple things here
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Mar 13, 2024, 3:29 PM
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1) This couple is ###????
2) If the other MSynan says she wants to go on a trip (she went to Clemson a couple of weeks ago) my answer is always not only yes, but hell yes. I got the kids honey, don't you worry about it
Between my travels to Clemson games, to see Panic, or just Saturday night at the bar with my buddies, I am way ahead on this one, and am glad to pay back some of the deposits I have withdrawn from the back of marital goodwill over the years
See you in St. Augustine the 23rd and 24th all effed up for Widespread Panic
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Oculus Spirit [79429]
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A few points:
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Mar 13, 2024, 3:42 PM
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1) This is a wedding/bachelorette party for someone who is already married with child. I fundamentally have a problem with it due to that.
2) This is going to require me to essentially take half a month off of work. We have childcare lined up for our vacation, but that'll be on me while she's gone. Grandparents ain't got time to stay for 2 weeks. Then more days off the next month to attend the wedding.
3) It's literal days before a big vacation that we have planned/saved for years to go on. I'd like to pump thousands of dollars of gas into my boat and eat the finest seafood while drinking expensive alcohol without having to worry about it, a 5 day beach trip 9 hours away complicates that plan for obvious reasons.
Otherwise, in a vacuum, I would agree.
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All-TigerNet [11207]
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Thehellswrongwithpeople?
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Mar 13, 2024, 4:22 PM
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Tell her to join a book club if she wants to hang with her gal pals. Just don’t have the meetings at a 5 star resort 10 hours away.
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All-In [31518]
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Re: In today's "Mid 30's man yells at clouds" topic, has anyone else noticed this
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Mar 13, 2024, 6:08 PM
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Bachelor/Bachelorette “trips” have gotten out of hand. I got married pre-Instagram and I don’t remember it being a thing, I feel like now everyone has to one up everyone else for the gram.
My bachelor party me and all my groomsmen that could come went out for steaks then went to Platinum Plus. Simple and to the point.
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