An Orange Cowboy Hat? It's A Keeper

by - Correspondent -
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If you’re married, you know the feeling…your wife looks at you when you’re eating supper and enjoying the Tiger Insider. She looks at you like you’re somehow ruining the sanctity of the family unit itself by reading Tiger Insider during dinner. Nevermind the fact that you’ve been working all day and when you got home the TI was waiting for you. She wants to talk.

Well, tell her to do some reading of her own. Hand her this list and tell her that reading the Tiger Insider anywhere, anytime you please is a right that she can’t make you give up. Tell her to memorize this list and the next time an old girlfriend walks up while you’re tailgating to save the dirty look on her face for something more serious. Next time you crank up the stereo with the 45 of Death Valley Disco as loud as it’ll go and she puts her hands over her ears, tell her to get used to it because it’s football season and that’s one of the things a Clemson man does during football season.

Next time she doesn’t understand something you do during football season (or anytime during the year for that matter) just hand her the list below. It’s for all Clemson men who are married, engaged or a have a steady girlfriend. It’s a list of some things that the woman in a Clemson man’s life can’t make him give up.

Here’s the list for starters…feel free to add your own and it could make it into the January/February Tiger Insider. Also contribute to the list and you could win a free year’s subscription to Tiger Insider, or get your subscription extended if you’re already a subscriber.

42 Things A Woman Can’t Ask A Clemson Man To Give Up

1. Three-hour long conversations in mid-May about the post-spring depth chart with your college buddy.

2. The right to break out the tape of the 1986 Georgia game when college buddy is in town.

3. The right to name your first child after a member of the 1981 National Championship team – even if it’s a girl.

4. The right to name your dog Ken Hatfield, at least until it’s housebroken.

5. Week-long fits of depression after a loss.

6. Listening to sports talk radio during supper during spring football season (March-April), football season (Late July – Early January) and recruiting season (January – February).

7. The right to jump over you to reach the nearest male to slap high fives after a touchdown.

8. The right to talk to all ex-girlfriends while tailgating.

9. Your orange overalls and orange cowboy hat.

10. Your old Clemson t-shirts – the old ones can go in a drawer, but any from the past ten years are to be hung in the closet.

11. The right to skip the wedding of any couple dumb enough to schedule their’s on the Saturday of a Clemson game – even if you’re supposed to be the best man.

12. Listening to sports talk radio every night during the height of recruiting season, even if it’s during your child’s birthday party.

13. Your orange cowboy hat.

14. The 45 of Death Valley Disco.

15. Playing Tiger Rag at 7:30 a.m. on game days so loud the neighbors can hear it.

16. TigerNet.

17. Walking through the floats at Homecoming.

18. Delusions that you’re still cool enough to hang out in the student section.

19. Your collection of old stadium cups.

20. Drinking from old stadium cups.

21. The hatred of all things Garnet.

22. Wearing your Clemson ring.

23. Your “Obed Ariri for Heisman” poster.

24. The right to correct anyone that pronounces it Clem-zun (It’s Clemp-son, dammit!)

25. Walking to the stadium without having to stop by the port-a-toilet for her.

26. Silence from Clemson to home after a loss, no matter how long the drive.

27. Wearing your lucky No. 13 Rodney Williams jersey to all Clemson games, even basketball games.

28. Second-guessing every play on the way home even after a win.

29. Three-hour conversations with college buddy about the latest commitment.

30. Two-hour conversations with college buddy about the latest rumored commitment.

31. That stack of old Clemson football programs.

32. Your right to quote every score from the 1981 National Championship season to her.

33. Your right to get misty eyed when the name Danny Ford is brought up.

34. Your preference for white on white uniforms on the road.

35. Your right to wave at every Clemson fan you pass on the way to road games.

36. Leaving church if the pastor isn’t finished by noon so you can catch the Tommy Bowden Show.

37. Your preference for upper deck seats so you can see the plays develop.

38. Your orange high tops.

39. Delusions that you really should have walked on while you were at Clemson.

40. The tenth beer while tailgating.

41. Going onto the field after every game.

42. Frequent retelling of where you were when Puntrooskie took place

In the current issue of Tiger Insider, the only independent magazine devoted to Clemson Sports:

  • "The Woody Factor" With plenty of young guns, the old heads keep on getting
    playing time.
  • Interviews: Reggie Herring and Becky Bowman
  • Walk-ons -- they are an even bigger factor with scholarship reductions. We take
    a look at three, including Toure Francis.
  • A guide to the media guides.
  • Southern Football -- Clif Collins gets straight at what makes Southern football
    special and a cut above what they play in the Big 10 or Pac 10.
  • Dan Scott takes a look at this year's basketball team. Will Larry Shyatt be
    able to prevent the kind of mistakes last year's young team made?
  • Mickey Plyler and Phil Kornblut -- the only place you'll be able to find these
    two recruiting gurus in the same magazine. They take a look at Clemson's
  • My Best Game: Charles Hafley remembers the 2000 Missouri game.
  • Clemson commitment Irvin Brisker is profiled. The Georgia product is ready to
    contribute to Clemson's line.
  • We detail Clemson's recruiting calendar. When will the coaches be on the road?
    We'll break it down.
  • Also, this is the first (and from some reports the last) Roscoe cover.
  • Much, much more and great Clemson photos

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