Topic: Nick Saban died and went to heaven. . .
Replies: 3   Last Post: Feb 5, 2019 6:36 AM by: huhud82
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Nick Saban died and went to heaven. . .

Posted: Feb 4, 2019 8:19 PM

(apologies if this is Germans) Nick Saban, after living a full life, died. When he got to heaven, God was showing him around. They came to a modest little house with a faded Crimson Tide flag in the window. "This house is yours for eternity Nick, said God. "This is very special; not everyone gets a house up here." Nick felt special, indeed, and walked up to his house.

On his way up the porch, he noticed another house just around the corner. It was a huge 3-story mansion with Orange and Purple sidewalks and drive ways, a 50 foot tall flagpole with an enormous Clemson logo flag waving, a swimming pool in shape of a Tiger Paw, a Clemson Paw print in every window, and a Dabo Swinney statue in the front yard.

Nick looked at God and said "God, I'm not trying to be ungrateful, but I have a question. I led the LSU Tigers to the BCS National Championship in 2003 and the Alabama Crimson Tide to BCS and AP national championships in 2009, 2011, 2012, and College Football Playoff championships in 2015 and 2017. I became the first coach in college football history to win a national championship with two different Football Bowl Subdivision schools since the inception of the AP Poll in 1936"

God said "So what's your point Nick?"

"Well, why does Dabo Swinney get a better house than me?"

God chuckled, and said "Nick, that's not Dabo's house, it's mine.

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"Democracy is the theory that the common people know what they want, and deserve to get it good and hard."
- H. L. Mencken

You win Post of the Year!

Posted: Feb 4, 2019 9:17 PM

It's early, but...nah...no one can top that! Well done!

You lost me at 'Saban in heaven.'***

Posted: Feb 4, 2019 9:20 PM

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Could I add just one more punchline?

Posted: Feb 5, 2019 6:36 AM

You should never try to top perfection, but I thought of one added "kicker" to this great joke. See if it works:

After Nick learns it's God's house, he says, "Lord, I totally understand & that's cool with me. Just asking, but could you grant me a couple of small extra favors?" God says, "Maybe...whatcha got in mind?" Nick says, "Well, since I'll be here forever, could I keep dying my hair, & could you make me - say - 5-foot-7?"

...Just thought I'd try the addition - - run another Tigerpaw flag up the pole & see if it flies.

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