Replies: 10
| visibility 1
|
Orange Blooded [2955]
TigerPulse: 100%
Posts: 2448
Joined: 6/20/05
|
I know it's not Clemson, but it's still Football (long)
Aug 21, 2018, 2:36 PM
|
|
I've started writing again, and wanted to see what you thought. Now I know this is a horrible place to ask for any type of advise, unless its beer, but I figured I would give it a shot. Let me know what you think.
A Road Trip in the Making. This Friday night the Landrum High School football team will load buses shortly after classes end, and make the hour and a half trip down to Dixie High School. Dixie is located in the Due West part of Abbeville County. For localist like myself, even I had to google it. Dixie is largely known for their baseball program, but when people say there’s something in the water of Lake Greenwood they stand true to their word. A lot of Upstate residents are familiar with Greenwood, and Abbeville County Schools recent run of success in the fall the past few years. Going back to the early 2000’s, Chapman lost an Upper State Championship to the eventual State Champion Abbeville Panthers. The success looks to have sustained for a while, flowing into Due West. Last week Dixie held Christ Church scoreless in the opening game. While only scoring 19 points on offense, the defense holds their key to winning on the field. Thanks to Mike Clark, Cooper Gentry, and LC Williams, the Cardinal offense looked like a different monster than in years past. Going up against a 4A school like Blue Ridge is never easy, but Coach Farmer had is offense right where they needed to be. Defensively, Landrum has hit the weight room over the summer, and it paid off tremendously in the trenches. Blue Ridge was unable to move the ball on the ground due to several key linebackers. Eventually the Tigers QB had to start throwing, and regretted the decision almost immediately as the Cards came up with an interception leading to another rushing touchdown. The Landrum faithful will pack lightly and convoy down Hwy 221 to find the little school that’s due west of something. Although the game isn’t a conference game, if Farmer wants to get into the playoffs this year his boys need to be on their toes and come out swinging. We will find out at 7:30 on the 24th if the Cards can hold their own at the line and start a winning streak. Something the Landrum hopefuls have been seeking for a while.
Written by RG Daniels
|
|
|
|
110%er [5912]
TigerPulse: 100%
Posts: 8567
Joined: 11/30/98
|
If you are serious about wanting feedback,
Aug 21, 2018, 2:44 PM
|
|
paragraphs would really help.
|
|
|
|
|
Orange Blooded [2955]
TigerPulse: 100%
Posts: 2448
Joined: 6/20/05
|
It's for a newspaper
Aug 21, 2018, 2:46 PM
|
|
I was told to write it in one block, so they could edit it into place.
|
|
|
|
|
110%er [5912]
TigerPulse: 100%
Posts: 8567
Joined: 11/30/98
|
IF it's for a newspaper
Aug 21, 2018, 3:12 PM
|
|
it needs a lot of work.
|
|
|
|
|
110%er [5912]
TigerPulse: 100%
Posts: 8567
Joined: 11/30/98
|
Re: IF it's for a newspaper
Aug 21, 2018, 3:16 PM
|
|
It needs a lot of work with commas and possession (apostrophes).
For one thing - Abbeville County doesn't touch Lake Greenwood
I believe, but check - the general area is know as The Lakelands Region
|
|
|
|
|
Orange Blooded [2955]
TigerPulse: 100%
Posts: 2448
Joined: 6/20/05
|
Will do, thank you***
Aug 21, 2018, 3:17 PM
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Heisman Winner [105574]
TigerPulse: 100%
Posts: 44178
Joined: 12/22/08
|
Is "RG Daniels" Mackey's new alias?***
Aug 21, 2018, 2:52 PM
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
MVP [508]
TigerPulse: 100%
Posts: 181
Joined: 2/8/18
|
Re: I know it's not Clemson, but it's still Football (long)
Aug 21, 2018, 3:19 PM
|
|
Proofread. I'm no writer or editor, but...
but Coach Farmer had is offense right where they needed to be.
Otherwise, pretty easy to read.
|
|
|
|
|
Orange Blooded [2955]
TigerPulse: 100%
Posts: 2448
Joined: 6/20/05
|
Thanks, I'll fix that.***
Aug 21, 2018, 3:21 PM
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
All-TigerNet [10631]
TigerPulse: 100%
Posts: 9260
Joined: 12/29/06
|
Re: I know it's not Clemson, but it's still Football (long)
Aug 21, 2018, 3:38 PM
|
|
Keep working on it. Good writing takes a lot of time and effort. I'm not a particularly good writer but have worked with a bunch of them, mostly professional sports writers. One thing they all do is fact check and make sure that all names, locations, are factual and spelled correctly. They pay great attention to detail. Good luck and enjoy the process.
|
|
|
|
|
Orange Blooded [2955]
TigerPulse: 100%
Posts: 2448
Joined: 6/20/05
|
Thanks man, I really appreciate that***
Aug 21, 2018, 3:42 PM
|
|
|
|
|
|
Replies: 10
| visibility 1
|
|
|