|
Replies: 84
| visibility 1
|
CU Medallion [65975]
TigerPulse: 100%
Posts: 24687
Joined: 6/12/14
|
ITT we post one night stand stories
Jul 17, 2017, 11:30 AM
|
|
Good, bad, indifferent
Out with a friend, his girl and another girl at TDs, Saturday night, live band, was cutting a mean rug, I lived in Johnstone at the time, me and the girls got our grind on, tell her let's head to my room. Got busy like we were in a Burger King bathroom. Wake up next morning like, horry shiite, give her a fake number, but she knows where I live, not only that we had a freaking directory she looked me up. Calls about ten times and finally she drops a note under my door after beating on it like five times. Note asking me out the next Saturday. Ignore it. See her two years later at same buddy's wedding, tried to hit again, she wouldn't even look at me. Still only know her first name. But had #####.
|
|
|
|
 |
All-In [35541]
TigerPulse: 100%
Posts: 14328
Joined: 4/7/17
|
few years back
Jul 17, 2017, 11:34 AM
|
|
I met this chick on OKC, went to a bar for 1st time meet up. She was staying in a hotel b/c her apt had flooded. Also she didn't have a car b/c her mom was using her so she walked to the bar. After a few drinks I offered to give her a ride home to the hotel. We wound up hooking up.
Fast forward to about a yr later she hit me up b/c she was really depressed and needed someone to talk to. Her best friend had just died so I picked her up and we went back to my place. Watched some netflix then I made sex on her. She cried afterward. I took her back to her apt.
|
|
|
|
|
|
Oculus Spirit [79110]
TigerPulse: 100%
Posts: 24908
Joined: 8/29/12
|
Was the crying from #####, or crippling depression
Jul 17, 2017, 11:37 AM
|
|
b/c of the #####?
|
|
|
|
|
|
All-In [35541]
TigerPulse: 100%
Posts: 14328
Joined: 4/7/17
|
TOTE1 is a master poosay eater
Jul 17, 2017, 11:40 AM
|
|
and i wouldn't go down on her b/c one night stand. Thats prob why she was crying. felt bad for about 2 seconds
|
|
|
|
|
|
110%er [5323]
TigerPulse: 100%
Posts: 1951
Joined: 5/17/17
|
I'm kinda like a dog
Jul 17, 2017, 11:45 AM
|
|
I'll eat it no matter what it smells like or no matter the circumstances
|
|
|
|
|
|
CU Medallion [65975]
TigerPulse: 100%
Posts: 24687
Joined: 6/12/14
|
SMDH
Jul 17, 2017, 11:49 AM
|
|
.
|
|
|
|
|
|
Legend [19919]
TigerPulse: 100%
Posts: 7798
Joined: 10/12/08
|
This sounds like a 2 night stand.
Jul 17, 2017, 11:40 AM
[ in reply to few years back ] |
|
Is her name FUPA?
|
|
|
|
|
|
All-In [35541]
TigerPulse: 100%
Posts: 14328
Joined: 4/7/17
|
Never f'ed FUPA***
Jul 17, 2017, 11:45 AM
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Oculus Spirit [80954]
TigerPulse: 100%
Posts: 56044
Joined: 9/13/04
|
yet***
Jul 17, 2017, 1:22 PM
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
All-In [35541]
TigerPulse: 100%
Posts: 14328
Joined: 4/7/17
|
initially I started following her on fb
Jul 17, 2017, 1:24 PM
|
|
b/c I thought I could hit that but after seeing the train wreck of a life she leads its become pure entertainment. Its like reality TV w/o a scrip t
|
|
|
|
|
|
110%er [5323]
TigerPulse: 100%
Posts: 1951
Joined: 5/17/17
|
FHRITP***
Jul 18, 2017, 8:34 AM
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Oculus Spirit [79110]
TigerPulse: 100%
Posts: 24908
Joined: 8/29/12
|
I don't really have anything to contribute
Jul 17, 2017, 11:36 AM
|
|
Couple of times did text or Im'ed ex for #####. She had gotten fat and I was drunker thank skunker. She picked me up took me to her campus apartment. Don't remember what happened next but do remember awkward conversations the next day.
|
|
|
|
|
|
Rock Defender [53]
TigerPulse: 90%
Posts: 35
Joined: 11/30/98
|
I'll give it a go
Jul 17, 2017, 11:38 AM
|
|
Met a girl at Los Bravos and ended up back at her apartment. Was fortunate we ended up in the shower for this next part.
Prod, stop reading at this point.
I'm lying on the floor of the tub and she's straddled my face. Next thing I know I taste blood.
I freak out and jump up and start rinsing my mouth and face under the showerhead but there was still so much blood.
Fortunately for robertn, the blood was just from an in game nose injury and was not of the sloughed off variety.
Never called back. Never went back.
|
|
|
|
|
|
Oculus Spirit [79110]
TigerPulse: 100%
Posts: 24908
Joined: 8/29/12
|
Wait...so she sat on your face so hard it gave you a bloody
Jul 17, 2017, 11:41 AM
|
|
nose?
|
|
|
|
|
|
Rock Defender [53]
TigerPulse: 90%
Posts: 35
Joined: 11/30/98
|
Co wrecked.
Jul 17, 2017, 11:43 AM
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
All-In [35541]
TigerPulse: 100%
Posts: 14328
Joined: 4/7/17
|
Whale whale whale***
Jul 17, 2017, 11:45 AM
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
CU Medallion [64837]
TigerPulse: 100%
Posts: 22718
Joined: 9/27/04
|
The hell with Rec-specs, you needed one of these bad boys:***
Jul 17, 2017, 1:34 PM
[ in reply to Co wrecked. ] |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
CU Medallion [65975]
TigerPulse: 100%
Posts: 24687
Joined: 6/12/14
|
|
|
|
|
|
110%er [5323]
TigerPulse: 100%
Posts: 1951
Joined: 5/17/17
|
At CofC, there was a pudding party
Jul 17, 2017, 11:38 AM
|
|
Vanilla pudding all over the bottom floor of this house at Radcliffe place. I was hollering at this girl who had invited me. She knew the person who owned the house so asked me to come upstairs. She was in a bathing suit and covered in watery vanilla pudding that looked like splooge. I ate some out of her cooter upstairs before we hopped in the shower and did the making of love.
Took her home that night and smoked some weed. Put the sex on her twice before we went to sleep. Ddin't realize til the next morning that condom had broke because I was sexing her so hard. I thought what the hay and made some more sex with her.
Bought her plan B and took her back to pudding house where her frans were staying. I noped the F out because I wasn't helping cleaning all that pudding up. I mean, permanent damage must have been done to that house. I got back and was pist that my whole room smelled like vanilla pudding despite both of us having showered.
She blew my phone up for a few weeks before getting the hint that I didn't wnat to do any more sex with someone possessing such a disregard for home cleanliness.
|
|
|
|
|
|
Oculus Spirit [79110]
TigerPulse: 100%
Posts: 24908
Joined: 8/29/12
|
Eww groce
Jul 17, 2017, 11:48 AM
|
|
vanilla pudding.....just groce
always get chocolate
|
|
|
|
|
|
All-In [35541]
TigerPulse: 100%
Posts: 14328
Joined: 4/7/17
|
|
|
|
|
|
Oculus Spirit [82972]
TigerPulse: 100%
Posts: 80112
Joined: 11/29/99
|
Woke up on the floor with the dog.***
Jul 17, 2017, 11:39 AM
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
All-In [35541]
TigerPulse: 100%
Posts: 14328
Joined: 4/7/17
|
Two years ago
Jul 17, 2017, 11:39 AM
|
|
met chick from POF. Went on a date. Was not interested b/c whale, you get the picture. She texts constantly, I rarely reply. A few months pass and she hit me up, "Hey tote1 my bday is next week". Time to teach this chick a lesson. Tell her to meet me at Copper River b/c its her favorite place. Pay for her favorite meal. Invite her back to my place for netflix. Movie is over and I say "Time for me to go to bed" and walk her out to her car. My car is beside hers in the drive way. I say good bye to her and get in my car to pull it into the garage. I look over and she's rolled down her window. She says "I brought clothes to spend the night" I roll my window up w/o saying a word and pull the car into the garage closing the door behind me.
Never heard from again
|
|
|
|
|
|
110%er [5323]
TigerPulse: 100%
Posts: 1951
Joined: 5/17/17
|
#### man***
Jul 17, 2017, 11:43 AM
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Oculus Spirit [78876]
TigerPulse: 100%
Posts: 78623
Joined: 8/2/03
|
Ice cold.***
Jul 17, 2017, 11:57 AM
[ in reply to Two years ago ] |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
All-In [35541]
TigerPulse: 100%
Posts: 14328
Joined: 4/7/17
|
Re: Ice cold.***
Jul 17, 2017, 12:02 PM
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
CU Medallion [55642]
TigerPulse: 100%
Posts: 35258
Joined: 11/30/98
|
I'm just TUing Dave Chappelle/Rick James. Best. Ever.***
Jul 17, 2017, 12:43 PM
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
All-In [35541]
TigerPulse: 100%
Posts: 14328
Joined: 4/7/17
|
Thank you for the disclaimer
Jul 17, 2017, 12:45 PM
|
|
I was being to think you liked me
|
|
|
|
|
|
Oculus Spirit [78876]
TigerPulse: 100%
Posts: 78623
Joined: 8/2/03
|
Did you bring clothes over to spend the night?***
Jul 17, 2017, 12:46 PM
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
All-In [35541]
TigerPulse: 100%
Posts: 14328
Joined: 4/7/17
|
I always keep a go bag in the both cars***
Jul 17, 2017, 12:56 PM
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Oculus Spirit [78876]
TigerPulse: 100%
Posts: 78623
Joined: 8/2/03
|
Oh, look at Mr. Money Bags over hear with two Miatas.***
Jul 17, 2017, 1:03 PM
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
CU Medallion [60205]
TigerPulse: 100%
Posts: 42549
Joined: 11/30/98
|
|
|
|
|
|
Lot o points [155581]
TigerPulse: 100%
Posts: 65689
Joined: 5/6/13
|
look man, I don't want to step on any toes here....I've
Jul 17, 2017, 6:07 PM
[ in reply to Two years ago ] |
|
admittedly been out of the game for a while, but back in the day, if you were gonna give a girl the cold shoulder, the piece de resistance was having her pay for the meal.
|
|
|
|
|
|
All-In [35541]
TigerPulse: 100%
Posts: 14328
Joined: 4/7/17
|
2014
Jul 17, 2017, 11:43 AM
|
|
chick at work is throwing greenlights TOTE1s way. TOTE1 isn't interested b/c she's married. After two-three weeks of greenlights I saw fug it and meet her at Bilo parking lot after work. Get meh blowjay so move to backseat and raw dawg her. She freaks b/c no birth control. Let her sweat it our for a few weeks until she takes a test. Then I tell her Im vasectomy.
We continued to hookup for the six months following that. Always met her behind the theater and hooked up in the car. Never took her back to my place
|
|
|
|
|
|
Legend [19919]
TigerPulse: 100%
Posts: 7798
Joined: 10/12/08
|
|
|
|
|
|
All-In [34518]
TigerPulse: 100%
Posts: 41374
Joined: 4/20/01
|
kms0u812: tl;dr***
Jul 17, 2017, 11:49 AM
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Legend [17337]
TigerPulse: 100%
Posts: 3961
Joined: 4/11/01
|
I once took an attractive older woman home...
Jul 17, 2017, 11:52 AM
|
|
who I thought was just a cougar. I found out she was actually a MILF when she woke me up early the next morning to tell me she needed me to drop her off at her son's soccer match since her car was still at the bar where I picked her up.
Talk about a walk of shame for her. She had some nice teddies. No pigs as this was pre cell phone camera.
|
|
|
|
|
|
All-In [35541]
TigerPulse: 100%
Posts: 14328
Joined: 4/7/17
|
2015
Jul 17, 2017, 11:53 AM
|
|
Knew this chick from Wompus Woods. She was 19 at the time. She feel in love with TOTE1 but he would not give her the time of day. Following year her bday rolls around and I take her to Applebees b/c LDR. Hang out for a while and chat. After dinner I drive her back to her car at her work place, Dollar General. Give kiss goodbye, which turned into her in the backseat of the car. 20 yr old teds are the best, solid beej/handy combo, everything nice and tight. finish up and head home
Following day she puts herself in a relationship with grease ball redneck on buddybook lutz
|
|
|
|
|
|
CU Medallion [64837]
TigerPulse: 100%
Posts: 22718
Joined: 9/27/04
|
grease ball redneck - she clearly has a type.
Jul 17, 2017, 1:37 PM
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Hall of Famer [22930]
TigerPulse: 100%
Posts: 16889
Joined: 12/2/00
|
Blizzard Blackout party
Jul 17, 2017, 12:08 PM
|
|
At a blizzard blackout party. Covered everything in black tarp. Had a craptastic amount of those styrofoam packing peanuts and floor fans. Those shreds of styrofoam get everywhere. In your beer, in your clothes.
I found out later that night they really do get everywhere, inside and out. The extra friction was no bueno on her.
|
|
|
|
|
|
All-In [40342]
TigerPulse: 100%
Posts: 23461
Joined: 7/13/12
|
sigma pi at clemson always had that party
Jul 17, 2017, 2:14 PM
|
|
sucked bawls as a pledge to clean up.
but me and another dude and chick tried to finish all the beer and failed. there was no 1 night stand.
|
|
|
|
|
|
Hall of Famer [22930]
TigerPulse: 100%
Posts: 16889
Joined: 12/2/00
|
That reminds me...you pledges needed to work harder
Jul 18, 2017, 2:02 AM
|
|
I have no clue how we were never kicked out of that house. Cops every week. Beer soaked carpet every weekend.
|
|
|
|
|
|
Hall of Famer [22930]
TigerPulse: 100%
Posts: 16889
Joined: 12/2/00
|
All you can drink night for $5
Jul 17, 2017, 12:09 PM
|
|
Went back to her place. Threw up a bunch. Brushed my teeth with her toothbrush afterward. Still had #####.
|
|
|
|
|
|
All-Pro [667]
TigerPulse: 98%
Posts: 399
Joined: 6/29/17
|
Best one I ever had
Jul 17, 2017, 12:19 PM
|
|
great curves and look to her. Very easy to lay down when the time came but solid built all the way around. Had a dark brown with a hint of red color.
Cherry stain on that night stand was gorgeous
|
|
|
|
|
|
All-Pro [667]
TigerPulse: 98%
Posts: 399
Joined: 6/29/17
|
But the best sexual encounter I had
Jul 17, 2017, 12:24 PM
|
|
wasn't a one night stand, it was a booty call.
Around 12 pm I get a text from a lesbian friend of mine I've known since high school. Well I guess she was Bi, anyways.
Said her fiance (bull dyke) was at work and she was craving some ####.
So I was happy to oblige.
Showed up at her apartment, she was on the bed in a robe and nothing else.
Pop Pop Pow
And out.
Went in without appropriate cover and had to buy her the plan b pill the next day.
|
|
|
|
|
|
All-In [35541]
TigerPulse: 100%
Posts: 14328
Joined: 4/7/17
|
Spring 2016
Jul 17, 2017, 12:41 PM
|
|
After VF16 dump Krazy Casey. Another chick at work I've known for about 3 yrs at that point started talking sexy time to me and sending nekked pics. Up until that point she was miss goody two shoes. Took TOTE1 by surprise. She came by my house after work on evening to hang out. Brings her 1.5 yr old with. Chick gives me a great bj on my couch while her kid is running around the house. She would stop to tell the kid to go play and go right back to polishing my dinkhead. I think her kid saw it a couple of times.
F'ed her chick a week later, never talked to again.
|
|
|
|
|
|
Oculus Spirit [97649]
TigerPulse: 100%
Posts: 64785
Joined: 7/13/02
|
Roommate's friend brings this girl to our apartment
Jul 17, 2017, 12:43 PM
|
|
He was hitting on her and getting nowhere, as usual for him. Anyway, roommate's friend goes outside to smoke (gave up) and she sits down beside me. Start chatting. We end upstairs and screw from around midnight to 3am. We go downstairs and smoke a....cigarette....on the back porch. Next day she leaves. Talk to roommate's friend who gave up night before. He told me she was just kicked out of university housing. So the next night girl returns. Screw again. Next morning toothbrush appears in bathroom. I kicked her out.
Technically a two-night stand. Closest I got.
PS. Roommates and I had ONE rule about women. That can come over. Sleep over. Whatever. The MINUTE her toothbrush or any personal hygiene equipment appears in the bathroom, she's gone. I never told above girl about the rule
|
|
|
|
|
|
Oculus Spirit [97649]
TigerPulse: 100%
Posts: 64785
Joined: 7/13/02
|
Followup.....
Jul 17, 2017, 2:34 PM
|
|
Same roommate's friend also brought the future Mrs. Tiggity to our apartment. By then he was smart enough to "warn" her about me. Didn't work. She was the third and final chick be brought by that I nailed.
Also, I told the future Mrs. Tiggity about the toothbrush rule. She was a keeper.
|
|
|
|
|
|
All-In [40342]
TigerPulse: 100%
Posts: 23461
Joined: 7/13/12
|
did you at least let him be a groomsman?
Jul 17, 2017, 3:46 PM
|
|
nothing like him bringing them in and you sealing the deal.
|
|
|
|
|
|
Oculus Spirit [97649]
TigerPulse: 100%
Posts: 64785
Joined: 7/13/02
|
Oddly,no. Should have though.***
Jul 17, 2017, 4:13 PM
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
CU Medallion [59974]
TigerPulse: 100%
Posts: 22468
Joined: 5/24/17
|
Re: ITT we post one night stand stories
Jul 17, 2017, 12:52 PM
|
|
Ri-Ra's in Raleigh about 2004-2005
ATM is out of order, no cash and at that time cabs didnt have CC machines.
Tell my boys I will jump on the grenade and get us a ride home.
Ask group of fat girls to give me and my boys a ride.
Me and my roommate had them come inside, they left the next morning.
We both have never spoken a word about that ride home or what took place after.
/nasty
|
|
|
|
|
|
All-In [33418]
TigerPulse: 100%
Posts: 32207
Joined: 2/20/04
|
Re: ITT we post one night stand stories
Jul 17, 2017, 12:53 PM
|
|
Went home with a slumpbuster after getting shitfaced in Buckhead all night, we go back to her apartment. I wake up at like 4am still wasted and my stomach is rumbling, so I sneak off to the hallway bathroom and proceed to blow it out.
Proceed to pass out while still on the throne, get woken up by a knock on the door and "Is everything alright?" Luckily she didn't come in, but I was busted.
Wake up next day, she has to give me ride home because these were the days before Uber was invented. "Thanks for the ride" were the only words spoken during the entire car ride
|
|
|
|
|
|
Heisman Winner [137748]
TigerPulse: 100%
Posts: 63736
Joined: 10/22/00
|
Hooked up with this chick in Clemson once.
Jul 17, 2017, 1:01 PM
|
|
Didn't quite close the deal, but we did everything but. You know when you, like, grab a woman’s breast and it’s li...and you feel it and...it feels like a bag of sand when you’re touching it.
That was an amazing night.
|
|
|
|
|
|
All-In [38925]
TigerPulse: 100%
Posts: 22731
Joined: 3/17/11
|
girls do it too.....
Jul 17, 2017, 1:17 PM
|
|
so this was at least 30 yrs ago, I was cruising the mall and picked up a guy I had talked to a few times.. we had a quickie and I dropped him off at his house. As he's getting out of the car we ask if we're meeting tomorrow night, I told him then NOPE, this was a one time thing.
Dude tried calling me, and I told him the same thing.. it was fun but not again.
Fool call my mom's house and told my mom her daughter was a wh0re.
Ohhh I met him at the mall again and busted his face.
|
|
|
|
|
|
All-In [35541]
TigerPulse: 100%
Posts: 14328
Joined: 4/7/17
|
Busted his face or busted on his face?
Jul 17, 2017, 1:19 PM
|
|
Quick Im almost done
|
|
|
|
|
|
All-In [38925]
TigerPulse: 100%
Posts: 22731
Joined: 3/17/11
|
Re: Busted his face (I went to jail for it also)
Jul 17, 2017, 1:20 PM
|
|
but that a whole different story.
|
|
|
|
|
|
All-In [35541]
TigerPulse: 100%
Posts: 14328
Joined: 4/7/17
|
Like a whole different one night stand story?
Jul 17, 2017, 1:22 PM
|
|
lol
|
|
|
|
|
|
All-Pro [667]
TigerPulse: 98%
Posts: 399
Joined: 6/29/17
|
|
|
|
|
|
Oculus Spirit [79110]
TigerPulse: 100%
Posts: 24908
Joined: 8/29/12
|
and your nose?***
Jul 17, 2017, 1:30 PM
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
All-In [35541]
TigerPulse: 100%
Posts: 14328
Joined: 4/7/17
|
TIL OUMAA is robertn***
Jul 17, 2017, 1:33 PM
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Rock Defender [53]
TigerPulse: 90%
Posts: 35
Joined: 11/30/98
|
You shut your dirty hoooer mouth.***
Jul 17, 2017, 1:34 PM
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
All-Pro [667]
TigerPulse: 98%
Posts: 399
Joined: 6/29/17
|
don't be groce***
Jul 17, 2017, 1:35 PM
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
All-Pro [667]
TigerPulse: 98%
Posts: 399
Joined: 6/29/17
|
|
|
|
|
|
Oculus Spirit [97649]
TigerPulse: 100%
Posts: 64785
Joined: 7/13/02
|
Re: girls do it too.....
Jul 17, 2017, 2:27 PM
[ in reply to girls do it too..... ] |
|
Not that there's anything wrong with that. Quite the opposite in my book. In fact, the only mother of anyone I've ever sechsed that I've actually met or spoken with (or ever knew how to) was/is my mother-in-law. Never really thought about that, but yeah. Troo. Not cool on his part to out you to your mom.
I hope you learned your lesson. One night stands are for total strangers. If you're going to #### them and toss them in the recycle bin, best to not let them even know your last name.
And you've never been really stalked until you receive a letter post marked from Hong Kong and it's a chick you screwed at a euro-trash underground techno club on New Years Eve in Zermatt, Switzerland a year earlier. Just sayin.....
|
|
|
|
|
|
All-In [38925]
TigerPulse: 100%
Posts: 22731
Joined: 3/17/11
|
dude, I was out HS and living on my own
Jul 17, 2017, 3:22 PM
|
|
my mom knew I wasn't a virgin.
He was basically stranger, but it was Gwd...and I was easily found plus all he had to do was find one of little phone books they printed back then with all the students home numbers. Fool probably didn't even realize I didn't live with mama.
Now if you want to talk one night stands with my males buddies, NOW THOSE WERE ALL FUN... wink
|
|
|
|
|
|
Oculus Spirit [97649]
TigerPulse: 100%
Posts: 64785
Joined: 7/13/02
|
Best thing about one night stands
Jul 17, 2017, 3:30 PM
|
|
##### is always better.
|
|
|
|
|
|
Hall of Famer [22930]
TigerPulse: 100%
Posts: 16889
Joined: 12/2/00
|
The Phantom Menace
Jul 17, 2017, 2:11 PM
|
|
One time when I was visiting some friends and family in DC, I went out drinking and ended up going home with a girl. I’ll be honest: this girl was not attractive. But she was into me, and she was there, and perhaps most importantly–she just gave off a bl0wjob vibe. You know the type; they aren’t good looking or exceptional in any way, but they just give off a look that says “I suck dlck like I made it up.’
I was pretty drunk when we got back to her place, but that didn’t seem to faze her. We didn’t even make it to the bedroom. She grabbed me right as we came in the door, undid my pants as she pushed me onto her white sofa and knelt on the ground in front of me, working me right there in her living room.
My god was I right: She blew me away, literally and figuratively. She must have spent at least 20 minutes fellating me, never once taking her mouth off my penls, slurping at the exact right moments in the exact right places. She was so good my ankles even started sweating. God bless whoever taught her.
As soon as she finished, she went to the bathroom to wash out her mouth (she’s one of those), and I stood up to rifle through my pants pocket and get a condom when I saw the sofa: there was a HUGE skid mark prominently displayed on her WHITE sofa.
I laughed at first. Then I remembered that she drove me to her place…and she lived a good 30 minutes away from where I was staying. As the thought of having to hitchhike 45 miles walked through my mind, she appeared out of the bathroom.
Thinking fast, I put my pants on the sofa and romantically whisked her into her bedroom, where I had to bang her at least 3 or 4 times to get to go to sleep. Once she was safely out, I snuck out of her room and flipped the cushion.
I wonder if she ever found that stain.
|
|
|
|
|
|
CU Medallion [65975]
TigerPulse: 100%
Posts: 24687
Joined: 6/12/14
|
Dude
Jul 17, 2017, 2:58 PM
|
|
.
|
|
|
|
|
|
Rock Defender [53]
TigerPulse: 90%
Posts: 35
Joined: 11/30/98
|
When you try to outjounge the jounge and end up manged.***
Jul 17, 2017, 3:07 PM
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
All-In [35541]
TigerPulse: 100%
Posts: 14328
Joined: 4/7/17
|
What's he supposed to do?***
Jul 17, 2017, 3:17 PM
[ in reply to Dude ] |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
CU Medallion [64837]
TigerPulse: 100%
Posts: 22718
Joined: 9/27/04
|
|
|
|
|
|
Oculus Spirit [79110]
TigerPulse: 100%
Posts: 24908
Joined: 8/29/12
|
|
|
|
|
|
110%er [5323]
TigerPulse: 100%
Posts: 1951
Joined: 5/17/17
|
Two things
Jul 17, 2017, 3:44 PM
[ in reply to The Phantom Menace ] |
|
1) She learned from her dad
2) Wipe your phukkin aazzzz
|
|
|
|
|
|
CU Medallion [64837]
TigerPulse: 100%
Posts: 22718
Joined: 9/27/04
|
I agree.
Jul 17, 2017, 3:49 PM
|
|
While being able to identify a good dink-blower at a bar based solely on looks and a 2 minute conversation is a good skill, being able to properly wipe your asss seems more important.
|
|
|
|
|
|
Legend [17337]
TigerPulse: 100%
Posts: 3961
Joined: 4/11/01
|
If she made his ankles sweat...
Jul 17, 2017, 4:21 PM
[ in reply to Two things ] |
|
she probably made his ásshole sweat too. No matter how thoroughly you wipe, that'll leave a mark.
|
|
|
|
|
|
Orange Blooded [2894]
TigerPulse: 100%
Posts: 3689
Joined: 3/13/03
|
Poor girl was unattractive and couldn't afford a floor.***
Jul 17, 2017, 5:37 PM
[ in reply to The Phantom Menace ] |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Orange Blooded [2894]
TigerPulse: 100%
Posts: 3689
Joined: 3/13/03
|
Re: The Phantom Menace
Jul 17, 2017, 5:38 PM
[ in reply to The Phantom Menace ] |
|
Taint nothing you can do for that butt leave.
|
|
|
|
|
|
Legend [19919]
TigerPulse: 100%
Posts: 7798
Joined: 10/12/08
|
This sir, is solid gold.
Jul 17, 2017, 8:54 PM
[ in reply to The Phantom Menace ] |
|
Joke's on you. That mark was there from the dink she slurped the night before.
|
|
|
|
|
|
Orange Blooded [3166]
TigerPulse: 100%
Posts: 1132
Joined: 10/10/14
|
on a related note
Jul 18, 2017, 9:58 AM
[ in reply to The Phantom Menace ] |
|
My college roommate was a pharmacy tech at KMart pharmacy in cootlumbia. He worked with a 6/10 slightly chubby red head that was a freak and had massive mammories. Her name was Jessica. We called her skid marks b/c she told a story about a guy she brought back to her place and gave a beej who sat up on her pillow while she felated him and left a stripe. We probably would have cut her some slack for this story, except that she admitted that she invited him back over a couple of days later and repeated the act thinking that it was just a unique circumstance that caused the issue, only to get shidded on again. To top it off, she finally admitted that after he used her pillow as TP not once, but TWICE, she still kept inviting him over for teh ##### and just stopped blowing him while he sat on the pillow.
|
|
|
|
|
|
Walk-On [142]
TigerPulse: 100%
Posts: 85
Joined: 3/9/15
|
Re: ITT we post one night stand stories
Jul 17, 2017, 8:41 PM
|
|
My best friends parents had a yearly rental at the beach and tennis resort in Hilton Head. We worked together so we always had the same schedule. So we would go down a couple times a month during the summer. One night we were getting hammered and I start chatting up a woman sitting all by herself. A few shots later I blatently ask "do you want to ###". To Tigerstone surprise she was down. I had had the key to the room and my buddy made me trade him the key for a condom. So me and ol girl go to hump it out on the beach. We didn't quite make it to the sand we begin boning it out on the board walk. Next thing I remember was waking up to some one walking by me as I lay there butt ### nekid with the woman wrapped in a table cloth we stole off an out door dining table. I wake her and we walk back to the room at 4 am. My buddy was wasted and passed out with the door wide open. We go in and bump uglies a couple more times. Fall back asleep and she wakes me up for a ride back to her place. I give her a ride and she asks if I would like to meet her marine son and his daughter. I refuse and go back to the room. To this day I'm still the grandmother fuker.
|
|
|
|
|
|
Legend [17337]
TigerPulse: 100%
Posts: 3961
Joined: 4/11/01
|
Well...
Jul 17, 2017, 9:20 PM
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
CU Medallion [64837]
TigerPulse: 100%
Posts: 22718
Joined: 9/27/04
|
|
|
|
|
|
CU Medallion [65975]
TigerPulse: 100%
Posts: 24687
Joined: 6/12/14
|
|
|
|
|
|
Walk-On [142]
TigerPulse: 100%
Posts: 85
Joined: 3/9/15
|
Re: Your ninth post to Tnet was describing a ONS with a granny ?
Jul 18, 2017, 10:04 AM
|
|
Yea man. I usually just read through post. I'm a jounger at heart.
|
|
|
|
|
|
All-In [35541]
TigerPulse: 100%
Posts: 14328
Joined: 4/7/17
|
You never TUs any of my posts
Jul 18, 2017, 10:58 AM
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Replies: 84
| visibility 1
|
|
|
50
