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YOUR BALANCE
Pessimist's Guide to the 2013 Georgia Bulldogs
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Pessimist's Guide to the 2013 Georgia Bulldogs


Aug 2, 2013, 4:35 PM

When Mayor Kyle Weblog relieved us of his august presence and became Mayor-Emeritus Kyle Commenter, this blog lost the bastion of pessimism that had sustained it since its founding. As a program, we have been steeped for many years in the worrywart, self-deprecating tradition of Larry Munson and Vince Dooley, and I have tried to keep the flag of pessimism flying strongly since Kyle's departure. Alas, I have not always succeeded, and we are again awash in an interwebz full of optimistic ZOMG WE'RE GONNA FILL THE DEFENSIVE HOLES AND DO IT THIS YEAR people.

For those of you who, like me, have been wishing for a place to park your unfettered pessimism, look no further. You have arrived at that place of dark foreboding and surly disappointment.

Ladies and gentlemen, I present your 2013 Pessimist's Guide to the Georgia Football Season. While we're in this place, no game is a gimmie, no faults in our defense will go unexploited, and Penn Wagers (or his personal designee) will be refereeing every Georgia game.

Let's start at the beginning (all rankings are from the preseason coaches' poll):
Game 1: @ #8 Clemson

Why we'll win: I don't know. Maybe Clemson's entire offense gets a case of food poisoning the day of the game and Dabo has to call some students out of the stands to fill in?

Why we'll lose: Clemson is returning all of their major contributors on offense, and many of their contributors on defense. We're losing our ENTIRE starting defense, though we do still have some contributors from last year. Remember Jarvis Jones, Alec Ogletree, Bacarri Fudge Rambo, Sanders Commings, Shawn Williams, Kwame Geathers, and Big Bad Jon Jenkins? All gone. You don't lose all those playmakers and just keep rolling on as if nothing has changed.

On top of that, I'm super-wary of all this hype our offense is getting. Our defense got all the focus coming into last season, so our offense was able to quietly have one of the best seasons in Georgia history while the defense DERP'ed it up time and time again.

This year, everybody is expecting big things from the offense, and you don't go through an entire offseason reading articles about how awesome you are without losing some of the "chip" that made you so eager to prove yourself last season. I just don't see how we will be nearly as dominating as we were last year on offense. Last year, we were perfect at the end of the season. How do you improve from "perfect?" There's only one way to go from there. And Clemson has Tajh Boyd and his crew ready to jog our secondary up and down the hot, muggy, orange-spangled field all da mn day. This could get ugly.

Prediction: Loss, 48-17 (0-1)
(Real prediction: Toss up, somebody wins 42-38 )

Read the rest here

http://www.dawgsports.com/2013/8/2/4579766/your-pessimists-guide-to-the-2013-georgia-bulldogs-football-season

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Mississippi Tiger --------- Clemson University - 8 Time National Football Champions - 1900, 1906, 1948, 1950, 1981, 1983, 2016, 2018


So why are you guys so convinced that your defense is


Aug 2, 2013, 4:42 PM

going to be so stellar and didn't you lose three big time playmakers on offense?

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Re: So why are you guys so convinced that your defense is


Aug 2, 2013, 4:43 PM

Oh, I don't know. Maybe all our DB's are healthy, we have a bunch of studs coming in at DB, and our DL is just starting to hit their prime. Not to mention all the LB depth we have.

Just can't figure it out. Can you?

2024 white level memberbadge-donor-05yr.jpg flag link military_tech thumb_downthumb_up

Screw Calford.


Re: So why are you guys so convinced that your defense is


Aug 2, 2013, 6:14 PM [ in reply to So why are you guys so convinced that your defense is ]

Nuk's replacement.......All American Sammy Watkins, who BTW had an OK season by most peoples standards( not his)

Depth at reciever will not be our issue

Other postions will be reloaded.....no problem

Good luck with your defense.....hopefully no more suspensions for you before gametime.....Enjoy the show

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Clemson Football, the glory days are here!


Re: So why are you guys so convinced that your defense is


Aug 2, 2013, 8:58 PM

in case you haven't notice a majority of the writers, gurus and head coaches have The U of GA ranked at #5 inspite of our losses on defense.....but what do they know? I can't wait to watch you squirm in your seat as we methodically move the ball up and down the field burning clock. It's all about time of possession and we'll have more of it.

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Re: Re: So why are you guys so convinced that your defense is


Aug 2, 2013, 10:13 PM

The only reason you're offense burns time off the clock is because everyone knows the dawgs are all "slow" if you know what I mean.

I'm surprised you've figured out how to use a keyboard. Oh well, we'll just outscore you.

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I was answering a question posted about OUR TEAM


Aug 2, 2013, 11:08 PM [ in reply to Re: So why are you guys so convinced that your defense is ]

@ssface! I did not say a word about your precious offense. You had better hope that they can control the ball when they have it because your BRAND NEW defense is going to get it's @ss handed to them. The Chad is going to put on a CLINIC! Go back to moron school and leave the adults alone.

2024 white level member flag link military_tech thumb_downthumb_up

Clemson Football, the glory days are here!


Re: So why are you guys so convinced that your defense is


Aug 2, 2013, 11:20 PM [ in reply to Re: So why are you guys so convinced that your defense is ]

Haha, see you in Death Valley pal. If you think Clemson won't run your defense ragged then you don't watch much football. How can one offense dominate an average defense but another stellar offense will struggled against Georgia's average defense? There isn't much logic coming from this comment.

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Re: So why are you guys so convinced that your defense is


Aug 2, 2013, 11:19 PM [ in reply to So why are you guys so convinced that your defense is ]

You do know this was written by one of your own right? This is a dawg fan saying what could happen if Georgia doesn't show up.

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Just can't figure out why ppl are excited about a


Aug 2, 2013, 4:45 PM

defense that finished 57th in the country last last year.

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Probably the same reason fans are excited about a team that


Aug 2, 2013, 4:46 PM

lost its entire defense to graduation/draft.

2024 white level memberbadge-donor-05yr.jpg flag link military_tech thumb_downthumb_up

Screw Calford.


Re: Probably the same reason fans are excited about a team that


Aug 2, 2013, 4:54 PM

Exactly. I just had to slide a shot in there man. I can't always be the nice guy. It's fun to play devils advocate from time to time.

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Yes, especially when you're shown to be a hypocrite.***


Aug 2, 2013, 4:57 PM



2024 white level memberbadge-donor-05yr.jpg flag link military_tech thumb_downthumb_up

Screw Calford.


Re: Yes, especially when you're shown to be a hypocrite.***


Aug 2, 2013, 8:41 PM

If you say so chief.

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