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Topic: As my kid get older in starting to see the merit of participation trophies
Replies: 48   Last Post: May 10, 2016 8:49 AM by: Tiger-Den
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As my kid get older in starting to see the merit of participation trophies

emoji_events [5]
Posted: May 9, 2016 12:05 PM
 

Like many I was on the opposite side of participstion trophies (pts). Use to think they were just pc tools to make kids feel like unique little snowflakes.

Now that kids are getting older more and more of their friends come over I see the merit. I ask their friends what they are doing and if is often. ."Hanging out, playing video games, watching tv."

Im beginning to think that just actively participating in outdoor activities now a days is an accomplishment. Win or lose, the fact that you even tried is an achievement over your peers these days.

2020 white level member

Re: As my kid get older in starting to see the merit of participation trophies

[1]
Posted: May 9, 2016 12:30 PM
 

i see your point. when I was younger and went to the country club pool, there would be 20 kids there. now we are lucky to have three or four. they are all home on their phone

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Re: As my kid get older in starting to see the merit of participation trophies

emoji_events [9]
Posted: May 9, 2016 12:31 PM
 

Way to lower the bar! Now all you have to do is vote democrat in the next election and your turn to the darkside will be complete

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Age of kids?

[1]
Posted: May 9, 2016 12:36 PM
 

I say anything lower than 12, parents should be forcing them into SOMETHING. I mean, give the kid options of what they want to do, but have them do something.

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Re: Age of kids?


Posted: May 9, 2016 12:39 PM
 

Agree 100% - kids are way too lazy these days. When I was a kid I was active in sports from the age of 5 through high school. Seems kids nowadays just want to play video games or some other tech device.

For relaxing times, make it Suntory time


They do what parents

emoji_events [5]
Posted: May 9, 2016 12:49 PM
 

LET THEM DO!!!


Re: They do what parents

[1]
Posted: May 9, 2016 3:08 PM
 

you are 100% correct! I let my son do some things that he wants to but he will also do things I want him to do, such as feed the dog, pick up behind himself, say "yes sir/ma'am, play outside, play ball etc. I enjoy hunting and the outdoors and as long as he keeps showing interest, I'll keep doing it with him.

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Re: Age of kids?

[1]
Posted: May 9, 2016 1:47 PM
 

I accidently gave you a TD by mistake. #### smart phone.

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Re: Age of kids?

[1]
Posted: May 9, 2016 3:07 PM
 

Was curious as to why that post got a TD - leave it to #### ;)

For relaxing times, make it Suntory time


Re: Age of kids?

[1]
Posted: May 9, 2016 3:18 PM
 

I promise you it wasn't personal. I saw my phone blink and then I noticed I hit the TD by mistake. Please forgive me.

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Re: Age of kids?

[1]
Posted: May 9, 2016 3:37 PM
 

It's all good

For relaxing times, make it Suntory time


Completely False


Posted: May 10, 2016 8:49 AM
 

My sons are good not great athletes but good enough to be asked to play travel baseball, travel/AAU basketball & post-season all-star football. We monitor it so they don't get burned out and we actually have family time not to mention the crazy cost. My oldest is now in high school and down to one sport. However that one sport takes up 9 months of the year (doesn't count Rec basketball he plays for fun with his friends). The youngest still plays one each season. Starting about 12-13 most kids focus on one sport unless they are an exceptional athlete. They are far busier and better at each sport than we were as kids at their age.

If anything I think you have to guard against playing too much and stupid crazy expectations of parents that their kid is going to be a major D1 athlete. Let them enjoy themselves and once they get to high school you'll have a better sense of their real ability.


8 and 12***


Posted: May 9, 2016 12:46 PM
 



2020 white level member

At 12 they'd just need some sort of extra curricular


Posted: May 9, 2016 1:31 PM
 

if they don't like sports, then music, woodworking, just something. If they have a real passion for games and don't just do it because it is a mindless activity, have them do a design class or something.

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Re: At 12 they'd just need some sort of extra curricular


Posted: May 9, 2016 8:38 PM
 

games and tech interest is a bridge to the "makerverse"

circuits, micro controllers, programming, robot building, 3d printing

it's the wave of the future

:)

since the kids are going to be wrapped up in tech anyway, it's a good path

----i'm starting to learn more...when my 4 year old gets older, i hope to offer up some activities

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That's all well & good, but every kid needs some sort of


Posted: May 9, 2016 10:58 PM
 

physical activity, as well.

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That is an insane observation if you are being serious!

[4]
Posted: May 9, 2016 12:37 PM
 

Participation Trophys are garbage and for those kids who will get their lunches eaten.

I never have or will permit a child of mine to receive a "Participation" award. I recall being the only Dad who wouldn't let my Son get one after his Daniel Island Lacrosse Team lost to the Mt Pleasant All Star team in the finals game. Mothers were aghast and Fathers quietly came up to me and commended me for doing so (although they didn't have the balls to publicly state so to their own wives).

Now my kid Boxes, Wrestles and participates in MMA bouts. I assure you that he and his brother will be taking little "gamers" stuff when the $h!t hits the fan.


Re: That is an insane observation if you are being serious!

emoji_events [7]
Posted: May 9, 2016 12:39 PM
 

You are so cool tough guy,

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How do you feel about 5th place rings?***

[1]
Posted: May 9, 2016 12:55 PM
 



2020 white level member

Re: How do you feel about 5th place rings?***


Posted: May 9, 2016 2:10 PM
 

See what they did to the cooties??????


Re: That is an insane observation if you are being serious!

[2]
Posted: May 9, 2016 12:56 PM
 

I too agree participation trophies should not be handed out like candy. My view is sports are to be played (say ages 6&up)and there is a winner and a loser. I have played soccer since I was 5, thru college and now adult leagues. With 2 daughters I can only hope that sports will be a pivotal part of their lives. If not sports, hunting or fishing but they will know the difference between winning and losing and that hard work pays off.


Guess Clemson should return any gifts from Champ game too

[4]
Posted: May 9, 2016 1:02 PM
 

What's the problem with your kids having a memento from the season and celebrating a run to the championship game? Did you never get excited for any freebies during your time playing any sport or attending an event? Isn't the trophy an easy way for them to remember bonding with teammates and the fun/effort for the season?

Now I expect my kids to show up, participate, focus and work hard for any activity they pursue. If they're good enough to win a championship...Great! If they fail but still gave it all their effort...Great! If they half-@ssed their way through the season, then they need to be pulled from the team or taught the right effort.

Cub scouts give medals. Special Olympics gives medals. County fairs give ribbons. Schools hang artwork on walls. It's not just for the greatest or best, it's to recognize everybody for their effort and own ability.

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Re: Guess Clemson should return any gifts from Champ game too

[4]
Posted: May 9, 2016 1:17 PM
 

The debate about trophies is so silly. It's always framed as a "my generation" versus "these kid today" but they've been given ribbons and small trophies for participating for the full 40+ I've been around and don't think it started the day I was born. Kids are thrust to compete with consequences earlier and more than when I was kid. Just about every sport has year long travel leagues. It's a small fraction of parents that can't seem to distinguish between a U6 Rec league medal and actual championship trophies. Pop Warner gives out participation trophies but I can tell you the kids take them as small consolation when they lose a league championship game or lose in the playoffs with the hope of a trip to Orlando on the line. It just becomes a memento - possibility a reminder to strive harder the next season.

But little kids love them. And before they even really understand the rules of the game they will play their hearts out at soccer, tee-ball, basketball or whatever - for the promise of a Cici's pizza party and a silly trinket. And if that keeps them engaged long enough to actually learn the rules of the games and maybe even find one they actually like or can prosper at then it is a pretty good use of a dollars worth of metal and plastic.

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Agreed - been around almost 60 years and will be helping

[1]
Posted: May 9, 2016 1:46 PM
 

Coach the grand kids.

Make it fun especially for the young kids.

Even older kids need to goof off sometimes while at practice ---, whiffle ball home run derbies, alley oop contests, clocking times to 1st base, three point contests, ice cream treats.

For God's sake, it IS a game after all.

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Re: Agreed - been around almost 60 years and will be helping


Posted: May 9, 2016 4:59 PM
 

Blasphemy


Re: Guess Clemson should return any gifts from Champ game too


Posted: May 9, 2016 4:59 PM
 

The kick of it is they grow up and expect to be rewarded for breathing.


Re: Guess Clemson should return any gifts from Champ game too


Posted: May 9, 2016 4:57 PM
 

Cub Scouts and Boy Scouts give medals for reaching a goal, akin to winning. Participating isn't a goal. Participating is a prerequisite to winning or functioning in life. If anything a team jersey or T shirt should be the "reward" for participation. Thank the Lord my kids love being outside.


I'm sure your child will be indebted to you forever for that

emoji_events [11]
Posted: May 9, 2016 1:27 PM
 

time you were an arsehat in front of his teammates and their parents by refusing a trophy when he worked his butt off all season only to lose to an all-star team and then not only did he have to forfeit recognition due to his overzealous dad he was made to begin training as a fighter.

You are right. Sounds like he may very well grow up to take stuff from others.

Keep up the good work!


Re: I'm sure your child will be indebted to you forever for that


Posted: May 9, 2016 3:18 PM
 

WOW!! TU for your point.

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Better have Olympians give back their Silvers and Bronzes***


Posted: May 9, 2016 3:12 PM
 



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Apples and oranges.***


Posted: May 9, 2016 11:15 PM
 



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THATS NOTHING LEMME TELL YOU WHAT I DO

[3]
Posted: May 9, 2016 4:04 PM
 

WON TIME MY SON WHO WAS FOUR CAME UP TO ME AND SAID DADDY I DREW YOU A PICTURE OF YOU AND ME WELL I TOOK ONE LOOK AN IT DIDNT LOOK NUTHIN LIKE HIM OR ME I MEAN I HAD YELLOW HAIR AND HE HAD BROWN SKIN AN SO I SAID IF THIS IS THE BEST YOU CAN DO GO TO YOUR ROOM YOU AINT GETTIN DINNER

HE CRIED FOR A WHILE AN SAID HE WAS HUNGRY AND WHY DIDNT I LOVE HIM BUT LEMME TELL YOU SOMETHIN WHEN HE CAME OUT OF HIS ROOM HE HAD ANOTHER PICTURE AN IT HAD PROPER HAIR COLOR AN SKIN TONE AND LOOKED LIKE SOMETHING A WINNER WOULD DRAW. IF YOU WANT TO RAISE A WINNER, YOU GOTTA TREAT EM LIKE LOSERS SOMETIMES TO SEE HOW IT FEELS

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Re: THATS NOTHING LEMME TELL YOU WHAT I DO


Posted: May 9, 2016 5:15 PM
 

Is this your webpage?

http://www.thebestpageintheuniverse.net/c.cgi?u=irule

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Re: That is an insane observation if you are being serious!


Posted: May 10, 2016 12:41 AM
 

Mr. exyankee, what you've just said is one of the most insanely idiotic things I have ever heard. At no point in your rambling, incoherent response were you even close to anything that could be considered a rational thought. Everyone in this room is now dumber for having listened to it. I award you no points, and may God have mercy on your soul.:)


That's fascinating, I had just the opposite reaction. It

[2]
Posted: May 9, 2016 1:04 PM
 

seemed to me that they were more damaging. My son used to go to a karate tournament that gave huge trophies to every entrant. He let those trophies get broken, whatever. Now the trophies he WON for fighting, kata, whatever even though they were smaller, they were always prominently displayed.

Participation trophies are fine, but they shouldn't take away from achievement. The sooner we teach them that there are winners and losers, and that often greater personal advancements are made through failure, the more resilient and mentally tough they become.

Sorry for the sermon.

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Lol. Katas


Posted: May 9, 2016 1:14 PM
 

I remember those days.

2020 white level member

Re: Lol. Katas


Posted: May 9, 2016 8:33 PM
 

LOL! Yeah, me too. They were even worse as an adult. I always called it Ninjer Daincin.

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May I add...

[1]
Posted: May 9, 2016 9:10 PM
 

If you put in nothing you get nothing in return. The trophy for participation violates the laws of economics and physics, especially thermodynamics.

Work pays and work recognized is a great portion of the reward. If you do right and practice hard sometimes you're good but sometimes you're not. Every body isn't equal. The best don't always win and the worst don't always lose.

It's kinda sad to give the kid who didn't show up on time and sweat to get better the same award as the kid with the same natural talent who worked to developed his skill.

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Its amazing how early kids know the difference

[1]
Posted: May 9, 2016 1:13 PM
 

Mine are 10 and 6. 6 year old still loves getting any sort of award, especially game balls. That will change after he gets into all-stars and other non-rec sports.

My oldest knew the difference between trophies that were earned (yes even runner up trophies are earned) and which ones were just given to him for being on the team. By the time he was 8 he would display the earned ones and basically threw away the participation trophies. He has dozens of game balls. The only one's he keeps are his 1st HR, complete game and 1 or 2 other significant balls.


yup- the kids know


Posted: May 9, 2016 1:38 PM
 

My oldest is 6 and he chose not to play t-ball this year because they dont count outs, dont let you run more than 1 base at a time and everyone gets a turn to bat every inning (so no score is kept). Instead he chose soccer.

I explained that they dont keep score in soccer yet either... He replied, "Yeah, but I can keep score."


The kids know... they keep score even if you dont.

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Re: Its amazing how early kids know the difference


Posted: May 9, 2016 9:14 PM
 

My son who just graduated from Clemson hit his first home run ball, first grand slam ball and the ball representing his first no hit game into the woods. Meh. He also hit tournament MVP/game balls into the woods. He really liked to hit the ball.

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Heck Yeah! When I play golf - win, lose or tie, I am having


Posted: May 9, 2016 1:39 PM
 

A few beers afterwards ... Sometimes while playing!

Seriously, when I coached little league baseball and basketball, no participation trophies except for T-ball. But I always made sure we had a heck of an end of season party with some nice gift. At the Champs outlet, I could get MLB team baseball and college logo hats for about $6. At the party, we usually included a parent - kid game. Twelve and below, make practice and games fun to encourage participation!

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Re: As my kid get older in starting to see the merit of participation trophies


Posted: May 9, 2016 1:40 PM
 

Is it possible the "just hanging out" kids are that way because they didnt find value in getting a participation trophy and find more satisfaction with the winning or loosing of a video game?

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Anything is possible***

[1]
Posted: May 9, 2016 1:53 PM
 



2020 white level member

Re: As my kid get older in starting to see the merit of participation trophies


Posted: May 9, 2016 2:04 PM
 

From a psychological perspective I doubt it. Playstation and Xbox both use a "trophy" system that recognizes even the most mundane accomplishments.

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Are there video game related "accomplishments" that are


Posted: May 9, 2016 2:16 PM
 

not mundane?


Im guessing the ones that earn you $25,000.***

[1]
Posted: May 9, 2016 2:24 PM
 



2020 white level member

$25k? - Dota2 champs earned $6 million. $18 million purse.***


Posted: May 9, 2016 2:34 PM
 



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I totally agree.


Posted: May 9, 2016 9:01 PM
 

Parents are the reason they give out those trophies.

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