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Some friendly advice for men, protect yourself from false accusations
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Some friendly advice for men, protect yourself from false accusations


May 19, 2020, 10:28 AM

I'm speaking from MY experience. (May be long)

Most everyone here knows about my divorce but I'm going to fill in some details.

I was accused of sexually abusing my ex wife. Just so happened, I had hundreds of sexually suggestive pics (including some she sent me the same day she walked out on me and the boys) she had sent me over the years, videos of us engaging in sexual activities, videos of her telling me things she wanted me to do to her, etc.

All of this coinciding with the bs #metoo movement.

I won because of all of the pics/videos I had saved. If not for that, I'd have lost my kids and would have been stuck with alimony/child support, etc. In the beginning her lawyer was demanding almost $4,000 per month alimony/child support/our principal residence.

Those demands suddenly dropped when my attorney sent the exes attorney a few pics/videos. Her lawyer knew she didn't stand a chance.

My advice to men, no matter how "well" you know your wife or significant other, ALWAYS preserve anything that could help you out. I thought I knew my ex, together 11 years. But, turns out, I didn't.

My next piece of advice, fight for your kids. You have a 50/50 chance at custody if you fight for your kids. Most men don't fight because of preconceived notions that women always win.

I have full custody of my boys, I have the principal home, I pay no alimony. I fought her by but can only imagine the amount of men who don't fight for whatever reason and regrets it later.

Next thing, this ######## about believing all women is ########. Js.

Thanks for reading and thanks to those who have reached out via tmail over the last couple of years.

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hol up***


May 19, 2020, 10:33 AM



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WAIT A MINUTE***


May 19, 2020, 10:58 AM



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S??? ????? ???? ??? ??????? ?????? ???? ??? ??????,
S??? ????? ?? ?? ???????? ???? ? ??????? ??? ????? ?????..


wait a dayum minit...***


May 19, 2020, 11:48 AM



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Re: Some friendly advice for men, protect yourself from false accusations


May 19, 2020, 10:36 AM

Plus you have some future pron for yourself if needed.

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Re: Some friendly advice for men, protect yourself from false accusations


May 19, 2020, 10:38 AM

Haha truth. Its still saved on the computer.

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So...when is the fappening happening?***


May 19, 2020, 10:37 AM



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Cole @ Beach Cole w/ Clemson Hat


Re: So...when is the fappening happening?***


May 19, 2020, 10:38 AM

I wouldn't do her like that. That could come back to bite me square in the ### lol

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Re: Some friendly advice for men, protect yourself from false accusations


May 19, 2020, 10:39 AM

Also, forgot to add. What a complete %itch!! That was cruel. She seems heartless. Jeez. Sorry you had to go through that. That must feel great to know you got the best of her in the end. Also, what's her story now? Does she work? Is she with someone else?

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Re: Some friendly advice for men, protect yourself from false accusations


May 19, 2020, 10:43 AM

she actually was having affairs behind my back. My PI caught her in several instances. (Well he never caught her actually having sex but in positions that point to sexual relations)

One funny story is he followed her around Walmart with a dang video camera right in her face and she was oblivious to it all. (She was engaging in sexual conversation)

She is now several hundred miles away and rarely speaks to the boys.

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Re: Some friendly advice for men, protect yourself from false accusations


May 19, 2020, 10:46 AM

That would be so painful. Trust is everything. Luckily you don't have to see her. I bet you would take great joy though watching her fail.


This is the trendy word on all of the political talk shows lately. It applies here well.

scha·den·freu·de

noun
pleasure derived by someone from another person's misfortune.

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Re: Some friendly advice for men, protect yourself from false accusations


May 19, 2020, 10:56 AM

Carlsbad, it was very painful. For me and the boys. But, they don't know all of the details and I doubt I'll ever tell them all of the details.

They do know she left us for another man. Her fault, not mine. She picked them up one day for visitation not long after leaving us. Instead of spending time with her kids, she chose to sit on the phone for hours with her man while the boys were with her.

They heard way too much for their ages.

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Re: Some friendly advice for men, protect yourself from false accusations


May 19, 2020, 10:46 AM [ in reply to Re: Some friendly advice for men, protect yourself from false accusations ]

Carlsbad, I'm convinced most women can be witches when it comes to money, power, etc. As for me, I've always wanted to believe women when they accuse someone of sexual abuse or violence of some kind, but with what I went through, it's hard to just "believe women."

It does feel good knowing I prevailed.

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I'm not sure I'm following, exactly.


May 19, 2020, 10:40 AM

Can you provide some samples of saved videos to make it a little more concrete? I need to make sure I'm doing this right going forward.

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Re: I'm not sure I'm following, exactly.


May 19, 2020, 10:44 AM

Maybe I'll do that someday lol

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Don't get married. Got it.


May 19, 2020, 10:42 AM

Seriously, get snipped and be poor and you won't have to worry about women.

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Getting married is a pretty bad business relationship for a


May 20, 2020, 8:02 AM

man.

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Sorry you had to go through that. I bet she's really pissed


May 19, 2020, 10:44 AM

now that her plan backfired spectacularly. A good reason to never trust anybody and always be ready to inflict savage, unspeakable violence on people who cross you.

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Re: Sorry you had to go through that. I bet she's really pissed


May 19, 2020, 10:48 AM

oh yeah. Now she posts on social media about her previous good life, etc. Karma is truly a #####.

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I really don't know how you walk away without twisting the


May 19, 2020, 10:52 AM

knife as much as possible, but maybe you're a better guy than me. I guess you could go date a stripper or something, that would be fun.

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Re: I really don't know how you walk away without twisting the


May 19, 2020, 10:59 AM

I'm trying to be nice. Its hard though.

She was ordered to pay me $493 month child support. I've received exactly $120 in 12 months lol

I doubt she'd let me off the hook though if roles were reversed.

I don't really want to keep dragging the boys through court, guardian ad litem and all of the other stuff though.

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No, you need to fight for that.***


May 19, 2020, 11:01 AM



2024 orange level memberbadge-donor-10yr.jpg2011_pickem_champ.jpgbadge-ringofhonor-soccerkrzy.jpg flag link military_tech thumb_downthumb_up

Cole @ Beach Cole w/ Clemson Hat


Re: No, you need to fight for that.***


May 19, 2020, 11:02 AM

I'd agree if I really needed it. The boys aren't struggling in any way though.

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Re: No, you need to fight for that.***


May 19, 2020, 11:05 AM

Did you get her $1200? ;) Alimony first, right?

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Re: No, you need to fight for that.***


May 19, 2020, 11:11 AM

Haha. I would have if this years taxes hadn't been filed already.

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Re: No, you need to fight for that.***


May 19, 2020, 11:10 AM [ in reply to No, you need to fight for that.*** ]

I'm really hoping she gives up the boys. I mean like literally just walks away.

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Re: No, you need to fight for that.***


May 19, 2020, 11:20 AM [ in reply to No, you need to fight for that.*** ]

Exactly! At least do it for the kids. Start IRA's for them. It will be life changing for them to have them started so young.

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Yeah, but it'd be cool if you could collect the evidence and


May 19, 2020, 11:08 AM [ in reply to Re: I really don't know how you walk away without twisting the ]

hit up a judge in a year or two, maybe you could have her wages garnished. Possibly even jail time. Hell, why not plant some cocaine in the trunk of her car.

All options are on the table when somebody does you this dirty man.

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Re: Yeah, but it'd be cool if you could collect the evidence and


May 19, 2020, 11:12 AM

Exactly about the support.

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Re: I really don't know how you walk away without twisting the


May 19, 2020, 11:17 AM [ in reply to Re: I really don't know how you walk away without twisting the ]

Get her locked if she doesn't pay. Make her pay.

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The woman would***


May 20, 2020, 8:06 AM



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He probably is


May 19, 2020, 10:59 AM [ in reply to I really don't know how you walk away without twisting the ]

a better guy than you.

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S??? ????? ???? ??? ??????? ?????? ???? ??? ??????,
S??? ????? ?? ?? ???????? ???? ? ??????? ??? ????? ?????..


Depends on what you mean by "better"


May 19, 2020, 11:06 AM

I would be "better" at chopping her up into pieces and disposing of her in a rural pond. He's clearly a lot better at not doing that.

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What you know about women is usually


May 19, 2020, 10:55 AM [ in reply to Sorry you had to go through that. I bet she's really pissed ]

only what they want you to know about them.

Almost a direct quote. Some advice I ignored many, many moons ago.

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Re: What you know about women is usually


May 19, 2020, 10:56 AM

Truth.

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Local drama is similar.


May 19, 2020, 11:03 AM

Sister of a friend was cheating on her man. She's a super-hottie, but a stone-cold beesh.

Husband hires a PI, PI catches her dead-to-rights.

Husband files for alimony, custody of their two kids, etc.

Stone-cold beesh finds out she's pregnant with her adulterer's baby. He's also married. She wants to keep the kid (to probably make that guy's life helll and get money.)

Stone-cold beesh starts spreading rumors that her husband would sodomize her butt and stuff like that against her will.

However, stone-cold beesh always ran her mouth to her girlfriends how she loved anul and that sort of crap, so she's obviously lying.


Beeshes be crazy.

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S??? ????? ???? ??? ??????? ?????? ???? ??? ??????,
S??? ????? ?? ?? ???????? ???? ? ??????? ??? ????? ?????..


subscribed***


May 19, 2020, 11:05 AM



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Cat on a tin roof, dogs in a pile,
Nothin' left to do but smile, smile, smile!!!!


Re: Local drama is similar.


May 19, 2020, 11:14 AM [ in reply to Local drama is similar. ]

Haha. Speaking of girlfriends, one of the exes girlfriends actually wrote an affidavit in my favor.

Oh boy that didn't go over too well with the ex.

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Re: Local drama is similar.


May 19, 2020, 11:17 AM [ in reply to Local drama is similar. ]

One of the videos I have saved was the ex telling me how she wanted me to "hurt" her kitty. She liked it rough.

I've never asked her about it but I assume she forgot about all of our sex videos or she assumed I wouldn't use them.

Hell, I'd walk right into a court house and show it all if I needed too.

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Keep going, I'm almost there***


May 19, 2020, 11:18 AM [ in reply to Local drama is similar. ]



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I like your funny words magic man


Re: Keep going, I'm almost there***


May 19, 2020, 11:22 AM

??

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that sucks dude. with that out of the way


May 19, 2020, 11:27 AM

videos?

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GROUP TMALE PICS OF YOUR EX-WIFE'S SLURGE OR GTFO


May 19, 2020, 11:29 AM

thanks, in advance.

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We all know this, but women and men simply think


May 19, 2020, 11:37 AM

differently, especially regarding relational matters.

Words:
He: "Hi there. You look sexy tonight."
She: "Hi yourself. Thank you. You look good yourself."

Thoughts:
He: "That was a fun little conversation."
She: "He got something from me. He owes me."

I'm not saying that is 100% of all cases. We're talking tendencies here. But how else does one explain two consenting people doing the wild thing in the janitor's closet when they are 35, they then go their separate ways, maybe regretting it, then when they are 65 she comes out of nowhere and makes a deal about it? And its almost always her outing him, not the other way around? There is a difference in thought patterns. I am not saying one is a wrong way to think and the other right. Just saying that forgetting that gets guys in deep weeds.

Also - and I know women are on here - men tend to want to get away after a conflict happens, while women plan a later attack. Men fight during the conflict then want separation: women separate during the conflict but fight later. We call that vindictive, and maybe that is not a good word, but that tendency does tend to repeat regularly.

Perhaps this is a natural result of women feeling like they have less power in either the relationship or in a conflict. This should not be the case, and if it happens we men have to take responsibility for that. Channeling my inner Phil Donahue here.

Your story is a good one to remember.

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^^Is that you, Joe?


May 19, 2020, 1:48 PM

;)

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I dont remember.***


May 19, 2020, 1:51 PM



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You're lucky if that's as bad as it gets.


May 19, 2020, 2:41 PM [ in reply to We all know this, but women and men simply think ]

Me-'Where you want to eat this evening?'

Her-'It doesn't matter, pick a place, I'm good with anything.'

Me-'It's your night, doll, we'll go anywhere in the upstate.'

Her-'No really, let's not make a big deal out of our Friday night date.'

Me-'OK, just pick a spot.'

Her-'I really don't care, I'd even eat fast food, honestly it just doesn't matter'

Me-'OK, you said it, Burger King, Mc D or what.'

Her-'For heaven sake please, just pick one, will ya?'

Me-'How about Burger King then?'

Her-'You sonofa...I caught you with that bleached blonde slut red handed over 25 years ago...and now you want me to...and...and...and...for the next 5-7days.'

Wash, rinse repeat once a month for 30 years.

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You're two marriages and 7 children too late.


May 19, 2020, 2:33 PM

I'll know next time, right?

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Re: Some friendly advice for men, protect yourself from false accusations


May 19, 2020, 3:36 PM

I forgot to add, divorce, kids and the stroke a couple years back is why I took an extended hiatus from tigernet.

Hell, I'm just learning to be able to put together somewhat legible sentences again. ??

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Re: Some friendly advice for men, protect yourself from false accusations


May 19, 2020, 3:36 PM

I forgot to add, divorce, kids and the stroke a couple years back is why I took an extended hiatus from tigernet.

Hell, I'm just learning to be able to put together somewhat legible sentences again. ??

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Sorry you had to go through that.


May 19, 2020, 8:00 PM

Glad kids are in a better spot and you're clear of the btch. Hope you find somebody better, and remember not to marry them.

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I have no doubt there are a lot of guys that can identify with


May 20, 2020, 2:21 AM

what you went through. (Slowly raising my hand). I have shared some of it here, but still hesitant to post all the details. It's just too ugly, and still hurts in some ways. And it's a bit embarrassing.

I was married to a wonderful woman who was the perfect wife and mother for over 20 years. But she developed mental and emotional issues, and hooked up with a psychiatrist who basically just wrote scripts for a lot of different meds. I'm 1000% sure those meds exacerbated her problems, she became a different person. Total personality change, I didn't even recognize the person looking back at me when I looked into her eyes. She became volatile and violent and basically just went nuts. Started buying drugs off the street, getting arrested for various offenses, etc.

I became suspicious about some other things and installed some keylogger/spyware on the home computer. Spend the money, the free stuff is no good. Found out she was on the Ashley Madison "cheater" website and meeting other men at hotels while I was away at work. I retained an Attorney and hired a Private Investigator. Had to maintain my cool and act normal for several months while he got the evidence. And slowly got my ducks lined up in a row... prepared to cancel all credit cards and accounts with both our names on them, changing beneficiary on 401Ks and insurance, etc. Secretly packing up boxes in the attic with personal items. Irreplaceable stuff like family heirlooms, pictures, stuff like that.

When everything was ready, she went out to walk the dog one night and I threw the boxes in the car and left. Went to a hotel in another city and dropped out of sight. I was actually afraid of her, she had her CWP and carried her pistol on her 24/7. I hit the banks the next morning and withdrew half of the checking & savings accounts. Canceled all other joint accounts so she couldn't rack up debt in my name. Had her served with divorce papers that day. Naturally she was blowing up my phone all night and day, where are you, what's going on, etc. I just ignored them.

Good thing I took those safety measures, the tracking device was still on her car and the PI said she was cruising around looking for me. Local hotels, the houses of family & friends. She dropped almost $20K for one of the best divorce attorneys in the state and bragged she was gonna take me to the cleaners. (I spent less than $5K). At the preliminary hearing she had pictures of "bruises" and said I attacked her. I had proof I was in another town that night. Then my attorney presented the evidence from the PI... videos, pictures, etc. Proof of adultery, which automatically bars alimony in most states including SC. As well as any financial support until the divorce is final.

I was awarded possession of the marital home and she had until 5pm to vacate. She was livid and yelling and raising hel1 to the point the judge threatened her with contempt. She had walked in there confident and cocky, but I blindsided her and blew her out of the water. I was always two steps ahead of her and had planned carefully. The hardest part was acting normal and playing dumb for months while I got everything lined up. That was key, as was hiring a good PI. He cost me $10K but as my attorney explained - that will be the best money you ever spent. She has no job or source of income. If she gets for ex, $2000/month in alimony, that's $24K/year. In 10 years that's a quarter million dollars. Yep, I get it. The ROI is pretty clear.

Bottom line is - guys, you don't have to lose in a divorce. Be smart, hire a good attorney and do exactly what he says. Spend the money up front for a good PI and whatever else. Stay calm, cool and collected. Have a plan and follow it. I had 2 pages of checklist items. LOL

Oh yeah, just as my attorney predicted, before the divorce was final she showed up a couple times at the house. Crying and emotional and just wanted to "come inside and talk for a minute". Nope, don't take the bait. If you let her in the house she can claim you slept together. Legally that's called "condonation"... meaning, you have basically forgiven her for adultery and "condone it". You just blew your adultery case. I refused to open the door and knew the security cameras were recording it.

I could write a freaking book for men on How To Survive A Nasty Divorce and Come Out Smelling Like A Rose. In fact, I think I just did. Definitely falls under the TL/DR category.

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A drunk will run a STOP sign, but a stoner will wait for it to turn green.


Re: I have no doubt there are a lot of guys that can identify with


May 20, 2020, 7:20 AM

"Oh yeah, just as my attorney predicted, before the divorce was final she showed up a couple times at the house. Crying and emotional and just wanted to "come inside and talk for a minute". Nope, don't take the bait. If you let her in the house she can claim you slept together. Legally that's called "condonation"... meaning, you have basically forgiven her for adultery and "condone it". You just blew your adultery case."

My attorney gave me the exact same advice. And reiterated it over and over because the ex had a female attorney and was known to play some games.

And it wouldn't just ruin adultery, it ruins every aspect of the evidence I had on her.

As a man, you best have all your ducks in a row.

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Re: Some friendly advice for men, protect yourself from false accusations


May 20, 2020, 7:25 AM

Similar situation happened to my buddy.

He was accused of sexual harassment by his crazy wife.

He knowingly texted his friend about how he wanted to “work it out” knowing it would get passed to his friend’s girlfriend and then passed on to his ex-wife.

Sure enough his ex wife showed up at his doorstep at midnight crying and admitting she made it up. He recorded the whole thing.

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