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Limerick time
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Limerick time


Jan 3, 2017, 2:34 PM

There once was a kid named Jalen
Who thought he was in for smooth sailin'
But when Clemson came calling
His stats turned appalling
And by the end of the game he was ailin'!

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Can you put something in there about a bucket full of beer..


Jan 3, 2017, 2:50 PM

for Sarkisian?

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Re: Can you put something in there about a bucket full of beer..


Jan 3, 2017, 2:56 PM

I don't like to use the term queer
But something is odd around here
When Lane got kicked out
Sark declared with a shout,
"I'll coach for a bucket of beer!"

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Roses are Red and Violets are Blue


Jan 3, 2017, 2:59 PM

Sark likes beer

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...and I do as well***


Jan 3, 2017, 3:10 PM



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That's not a friggin limerick.


Jan 7, 2017, 10:01 AM

But I TUed it cause it was funny. I?beer2

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Re: Can you put something in there about a bucket full of beer..


Jan 3, 2017, 3:03 PM [ in reply to Can you put something in there about a bucket full of beer.. ]

Didn't Saban get custody of Sark in his divorce with Kiffen?

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Re: Can you put something in there about a bucket full of beer..


Jan 3, 2017, 9:51 PM

Just who won the divorce isn't clear
It left them both drenched in their tears
For Kiff things look stark
And Nik's stuck with Sark
But Sark's got a bucket of beer!

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Re: Limerick time


Jan 3, 2017, 2:54 PM

There once was a man named Kiffin
He left town before the @$$ kickin...

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Re: Limerick time


Jan 3, 2017, 3:48 PM

"Look out! It's the Pachyderm Squad!
Nick Saban's part human, part god!"
These Tigers ain't skeered -
Nick's cranky and weird.
We'll own that new green Tampa sod.

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GO TIGERS


Re: Limerick time


Jan 3, 2017, 3:51 PM

Our D front dismantled the Nuts.
Again, with no ifs, ands, or buts,
They're gonna do fine
With Hurts and his line -
They know how to bring their own guts.

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GO TIGERS


good***


Jan 5, 2017, 9:31 AM



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Best Is The Standard


Re: Limerick time


Jan 3, 2017, 6:09 PM

I can't, for the life of me, choose
Which ones of my or'nge pairs of shoes
I'm wearing on Monday -
The glorious one day
This season when Bama will lose!

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GO TIGERS


Re: Limerick time


Jan 3, 2017, 7:15 PM

"Got some bucknuts I can borrow?"
Is what Wilkins will say to Bo Scarbrough.
"It's called stop and frisk
Come at your own risk
And expect to be quite sore tomorrow!"

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Re: Limerick time


Jan 3, 2017, 7:37 PM

I'm thinkin' without Mr. Kiffin
Ol' Saban's O line might be whiffin'.
Won't know what to do
When Clelin busts through,
Then Hurts will be cryin' and sniffin'.

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GO TIGERS


Re: Limerick time


Jan 3, 2017, 9:04 PM

Reuben & Jalen & Bo
Deserve some respectin', although
Like buses left Lane,
They're missing this train -
Straight to the champ platform 'twill go!

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GO TIGERS


Re: Limerick time


Jan 3, 2017, 9:14 PM

There once was a player named Djitte
Whose playing was not very pretty
He missed the tip in
And inch from the rim
Why must he play so sh.tty?

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Re: Limerick time


Jan 3, 2017, 9:39 PM

I once herd a chikin a cluckin' -
his own team was surely a sukin'
"the Tater's will get beat...
the SEC will get meat"
regardless of their recent pluckin'

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Re: Limerick time


Jan 3, 2017, 9:46 PM

The Clemson fans don't need to worry.
Our all-time best gridiron story
Is gonna be written
When Bama gets bitten.
Deshaun will conclude it with glory!

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GO TIGERS


There once was a team called "The Tide"


Jan 3, 2017, 9:52 PM

Whose coach was so cranky and snide.
He flew to Tampa to win
But left with chagrin
Because his miraculous luck finally died.

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Re: Limerick time


Jan 3, 2017, 9:52 PM

Vicarious bandwagon Coots,
Whose fan base for Crimson Tide roots,
Might wanna dial back,
Since Clemson will whack
The Elephants right out their boots.

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GO TIGERS


Jack and Jill went up the hill


Jan 3, 2017, 9:55 PM

They each had a quarter
Jill came down with fifty cents
Did jack go up for water?

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^^^missed limeric lessons.***


Jan 3, 2017, 9:59 PM



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Re: Limerick time


Jan 3, 2017, 9:58 PM

Ol' Sark's pile of empties is high,
And Kiffin was glad to say 'bye'.
The only thing missing
Is Saban's boo-hissing
When he gets force-fed humble pie.

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GO TIGERS


The Tide came to Tampa to win,


Jan 3, 2017, 10:00 PM

Coached by their leprechaun's twin;
But Dabo and team,
Alabama did cream,
'Cause Saban's sinister luck finally died.

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Re: Limerick time


Jan 3, 2017, 10:07 PM

Come Monday night I'll be thrilled
When the elephant herd has been killed
With tide fans a'dyin'
And Saban a'cryin'
And Sark passed out drunk on the field!

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Clemson Tigers 'round the world will delight,


Jan 3, 2017, 10:11 PM

As Bama goes down Monday night.
Deshaun wins the game,
Making Bama look lame,
And causing Cootville once more to ignite.

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Re: Limerick time


Jan 3, 2017, 10:11 PM

Right by Walmart's Cheetos and pleather,
Some Bama fans might get together.
But mullets, Newports,
Wife-beaters, and jorts
Can't hide every single Coot feather.

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GO TIGERS


Re: Limerick time


Jan 3, 2017, 10:18 PM

Since Kiffin has blown off his task,
Sarkisian Nick Saban did ask.
He's new, so I'll bet
He's gonna forget
A few things, except for his flask.

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GO TIGERS


There once was a head coach named Swinney,


Jan 3, 2017, 10:26 PM

Who resurrected our Tigers like a Genie.
He promised us vict'ry,
And an Oculus trophy,
When he stomps Alabma's midget meanie.

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Re: Limerick time


Jan 3, 2017, 11:01 PM

After taking the bucknuts to the woodshed,
Down to Tampa the Tigers will head.
Led by a Christian and Big Dex,
Hurts is a hurtin' after getting suplexed.
The Tide tries to roll, but gets steamrolled instead!

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Re: Limerick time


Jan 3, 2017, 11:22 PM

The Tigers have what it takes to roll the Tide,
As they head to Tampa, and not just for the ride.
As Watson continues to complete every pass,
Clelan and Big Dex keep putting Hurts on his asss.
As midnight draws near, the elephant has died!

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Re: Limerick time


Jan 4, 2017, 1:42 AM

Our Special Teams, Deer Ol Nicky
Will not fall again for your tricky
If I had 800 bucks
I'd surely climb in my truck
Tampa bound instead of moaning, What the fricky!




Read to the tune of "Gloom, despair, and agony on me playing in the background!

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Re: Limerick time


Jan 4, 2017, 7:31 AM

Historical moments are nearing.
Though negative spin we keep hearing,
Paul Finebaum's BS
Will be put to rest
When Tiger fans leave Tampa cheering.

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excellent***


Jan 5, 2017, 9:35 AM



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Best Is The Standard


Re: Limerick time


Jan 4, 2017, 10:26 AM

Hey coots, you must understand
The Tigers are King of the land
You're just Tiger chow
So go away now
And bury your head in the sand!

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Re: Limerick time


Jan 4, 2017, 10:52 AM

There must be something in those hills
that gives every tiger fan chills
may we carry the same
down to tampa for the game
for we came to bust up on Bama's feelz

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Re: Limerick time


Jan 4, 2017, 11:44 AM

Tis true the funs in the winnin
as Coach Howard looks down just a grinnin
Tigers will dominate
Rolled Tide is their fate
What a sight Elephant heads just a spinnin

Determined Spirit Tigers do possess
The tide will be left in a mess
Come Monday Night
a hell of a fight
On knees Saban will acquiesce

The beginning of the end of the Tide
They may run but cannot hide
Tide rising with temper
as all they remember
The night Ole Bama cried

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Re: Limerick time


Jan 4, 2017, 6:36 PM

The Bama bravado is waning,
And Clemson momentum is gaining.
It comes to a peak
In less than a week -
Their great, spotless year we'll be staining.

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GO TIGERS


Re: Limerick time


Jan 4, 2017, 7:33 PM

The unjustifiable jeers
And egomaniacal leers
Are overinflated -
The Tide's overrated,
Much like Mr. Finebaum's big ears.

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GO TIGERS


Re: Limerick time


Jan 4, 2017, 9:10 PM

The media's comin' around,
Through plenty a huff and a frown -
They're gonna admit
Clemson is legit
When we wear the champion's crown.

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GO TIGERS


Re: Limerick time


Jan 4, 2017, 9:24 PM

I just heard a Coot say, "Roll Tide!"
Then, grinning a little, I sighed.
I told him an earful:
"You better be keerful -
I don't like Big Macs overfried."

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GO TIGERS


Re: Limerick time


Jan 4, 2017, 10:12 PM

Old Nicky's a creature most vile
Who spews anger, hatred, and bile
That evil old elf
Sold his soul to his self
And now that old devil can't smile.

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Re: Limerick time


Jan 4, 2017, 10:19 PM

Old Nick's got his head up his butt
And he thinks Clemson's stuck in a rut
But it won't take us long
To show him he's wrong
When we punch bama right in the gut

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Re: Limerick time


Jan 4, 2017, 10:24 PM

Hey, even I'm sick of these limericks by now. But what else am I going to do to pass time while I wait for the game, work? As if I could concentrate enough for that!

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Re: Limerick time


Jan 4, 2017, 10:31 PM

Superman is coming, ain't nothin' new-to-us
Media begging, Nick don't be so rude-to-us
Big Ben brings the pain
Here comes the Wayne Train
Christian gonna smile and squeeze yo Lugubrious

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Re: Limerick time


Jan 4, 2017, 10:46 PM

There's more to the Tigers than heart,
Although that's a critical part.
We're loaded with talents,
Good coaching, and balance -
The Tide will get beat from the start.

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GO TIGERS


Re: Limerick time


Jan 4, 2017, 11:20 PM

Not a Limerick, but here goes:

Stomp 'em, smash 'em,
Beat 'em, thrash 'em,
Bama's crashin'
In grand fashion!

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You can rest now...***


Jan 4, 2017, 11:26 PM



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Re: You can rest now...***


Jan 4, 2017, 11:32 PM

Ha ha, yeah I know it's beyond obnoxious at this point. Sorry. I'll stop as soon as bdrechs does.

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Re: You can rest now...***


Jan 5, 2017, 1:41 AM

Hey I'll go til game day, brotha. I'd have my usual pregame poetry thread going anyway if not for this one, so I'm gonna keep at it. Job ain't done til it gets done right, y'know?

GO TIGERS. BEAT BAMA.

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GO TIGERS


Re: You can rest now...***


Jan 5, 2017, 1:41 AM [ in reply to Re: You can rest now...*** ]

Hey I'll go til game day, brotha. I'd have my usual pregame poetry thread going anyway if not for this one, so I'm gonna keep at it. Job ain't done til it gets done right, y'know?

GO TIGERS. BEAT BAMA.

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GO TIGERS


Re: You can rest now...***


Jan 5, 2017, 9:25 AM

Yours are the best so keep them coming. I think I'm all rhymed out now, so get ready for the Haiku!

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For some reason Andrew Dice Clay poped into my mind when


Jan 4, 2017, 11:36 PM

I read this. Little boy blue and the like.

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By the 3rd quarter Sark will look like he's been hit by a car


Jan 5, 2017, 6:50 AM

All the pundits will declare Watson a Star
Sark will be passed out in the booth
With soiled pants and missing a tooth
Amidst an empty bottle of gin and cooler of PBR

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Re: Limerick time


Jan 5, 2017, 7:32 AM

Big whoop - Wilkins checked a guy's oil.
For all of the whining and toil,
Let's please not lose sight
Of late Monday night
When Tigers the Tide's hopes will spoil.

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GO TIGERS


Re: Limerick time


Jan 5, 2017, 9:35 AM

I'm sick of these limerick rhymes
Especially since half of the time
Despite slamming 'Bammer
The syntax and grammar
Are less of a poem than a crime!

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lol***


Jan 5, 2017, 9:40 AM



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Best Is The Standard


Re: Limerick time


Jan 5, 2017, 10:59 AM

This fondling story is bunk
But we'll keep hands off bama's junk
This time instead
We'll grab Jalen's head
And cram it up Fitzpatrick's trunk!

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Re: Limerick time


Jan 5, 2017, 3:06 PM

That angry Napoleon Nicky
Is gonna find out that it's tricky
To implement checks
On Wilkins and Dex
When Jalen misfires for a picky.

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GO TIGERS


Re: Limerick time


Jan 5, 2017, 9:57 PM

Oh Bama, you silly ol' thing,
You think that the world's on your string.
You can't yet imagine
The absolute thrashin'
Our D line is going to bring.

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GO TIGERS


Re: Limerick time


Jan 6, 2017, 8:44 AM

The average 'bama I.Q.
We'll outscore, it ain't hard to do
It's easy, you see,
A field goal for three
Or even a safety will do!

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Re: Limerick time


Jan 6, 2017, 9:54 AM

Bama's head coach that is a runt
In the 4th quarter will start to hunt
For someone to blame
for the loss of the game
And Kiffin will take the brunt

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Re: Limerick time


Jan 7, 2017, 9:41 AM

While Tigertown bears through a freezin',
Our boys can enjoy some warm breezin'.
They're hunkerin' down
With eyes on the crown,
Which, Monday, from Bama they're seizin'.

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GO TIGERS


Re: Limerick time


Jan 7, 2017, 10:23 AM

While 'bama fans aren't that well bred
They're certainly very well fed
And after the beat down
That's comin' in Tamp'town
The Tigers they'll very well dread!

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Re: Limerick time


Jan 7, 2017, 10:37 AM

Sittin on the toilet
Takin a poop
Waiting for our tigers
To get in the groove
Come Monday night
Prime time game
Bama facin the Tigers
And we can't be tamed.

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Re: Limerick time


Jan 7, 2017, 9:30 PM

Sittin over yonder drinkin a beer
Watchin the tide wipe their tears
Deshaun runnin for another first down
They can't stop nothing
Their defense isn't sound
We laughing we smilin bc they look distraught
What happened to that defense
They just got got.

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Re: Limerick time


Jan 7, 2017, 1:26 PM

You won't find a general better;
A leader right down to the letter.
Deshaun's never addled
When his cage is rattled.
The Tide won't escape their or'nge fetter.

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GO TIGERS


Re: Limerick time


Jan 7, 2017, 3:30 PM

Mike Williams will not be denied
Like when he gave that coot a ride
Consid'ring his powers
I'm glad he is ours
'Cause soon he'll be torching the tide!

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Re: Limerick time


Jan 8, 2017, 3:16 PM

We're nearing the Elephant Maiming -
The Great Tuscaloosa Defaming!
We do what we wanna -
These Tigers are gonna
Engage in some Crimson Tide taming.

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GO TIGERS


Re: Limerick time


Jan 8, 2017, 8:49 PM

The crimson tides' flaws will be laid bare
They're going to be needing some healthcare
At home in their beds
They'll be holding their heads
While Clemson is holding the hardware!

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Re: Limerick time


Jan 9, 2017, 5:13 PM

The cogs of the Tiger machine,
The likes of which Bama's not seen,
Are coming to life!
They'll crush, chew, and knife
The Elephants to smithereens!

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GO TIGERS


Re: Limerick time


Jan 9, 2017, 5:32 PM

The kings will be promptly deposed;
Their weaknesses will be exposed.
Come midnight in Tampa,
There'll be a new champ-a -
The Tiger's wrath soundly imposed!

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GO TIGERS


Re: Limerick time


Jan 10, 2017, 2:09 AM

For all the poetic largesse
And punditry's conjured distress,
The Tigers were steady -
At every turn, ready
To prove to the world they're the best.

CHAMPS. GO TIGERS.

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GO TIGERS


Re: Limerick time


Jan 10, 2017, 2:53 AM

The tigers are champs undisputed
We beat many teams well reputed
Achieving the dream
Of number one team
Our primacy can't be refuted

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Re: Limerick time


Jan 10, 2017, 7:22 AM

This team, through its grit and severity,
Took 4th quarter points like a charity!
They withstood the Tide,
Their guts, skill, and pride
Have bought them great honor and rarity!

GO TIGERS.

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GO TIGERS


Replies: 75
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