Ok. Too late now, but that's when you flip the tables.

I tried this once and it worked splendidly, fwiw.

When she gives you the phone call that she wants to "talk" to you about something....

1) It's always on the phone and always several hours before she will see you face to face
2) She will cut off her words short and her words will be sharp and forced sounding
3) She wants you to sweat for several hours over whatever she's about to unload on you

So given all that, you got to flip the tables on her. Ask her WHAT does she want to talk about. She will say you need to talk later. That's when you blow up and demand to know right now, on the phone. Usually when you get angry she will not be able to hold it in and she will unload. Then get in the huge argument you would have had later, NOW. On the phone.

By the time you get home she will feel bad and that way your evening is not ruined because she will be in a conciliatory (post argument) mood. Your evening will be pleasant and you may even end up having makeup sex.

Or you get home and she's gone. Either way your evening will be peaceful.

Tiggity®

Oculus Spirit [97724]

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Posts: 64864

Joined: 7/13/02

Lol. I tried that approach.

May 12, 2018, 12:12 PM

Problem: There are two human beings on Earth allowed to care for our children before preschool, which is 3 hours a day two days a week. My mother in law, and sister in law.

Heck, wife of works from home. I even offered to pay for a sitter to come daily, for 8 hours, 5 days a week, and she could pick the sitter. She wouldn't do it. Even though wife would be IN THE HOUSE with the sitter, again one that SHE picked. Nope. Couldn't do it. So sis-in-law keeps youngest 5 hours a day 3 days a week, MIL is caring for her own mother who's on hospice. That leaves wife of keeping son in her office. I would be fine, and he would be better served, in some type of daycare where he could socialize with other kids.

She's a control freak basically. It's sad. Until she's willing to help herself, or accept help, and be in less control, I can't help her, or us.

Last argument was over me not becoming friends with anyone in the neighborhood. I am friends with a few of the husbands, maybe 5-6 of them. But wife is of the opinion that I should befriend people I just don't really like, so our kids can play with their kids? I'm like ###? Evidently she is of the opinion that for our kids to play with other kids in the neighborhood we have to be friends with their parents? My parents were not friends with ANY of my friend's parents growing up. They had their own friends. I have my own friends. She's like "That's how it works now". I'm like "if it is, then that's exactly why I don't like those people." What's wrong with just letting our 9-year-old go outside, get on his bike, and go find someone to play with? That's what I did. But NO. Evidently there are other control freaks who have to like the parents of the children their kids play with and socialize with them on a regular basis or their kids can't play with those other kids. This is according to wife. Again, exactly part and parcel of why I don't like them. But our son is free, IMO, to go play with whoever he wants to play with in the neighborhood. We live in a nice neighborhood and I'm fine with him befriending anyone, even the kids of father's I've met who are ######.

I told my wife to pay close attention in the coming decade to which kids end up being problem kids. It will be the ones with mothers who are control freaks and control who they can be friends with, every bit of food they consume, every song they listen to, every movie they watch, the clothes they wear, the camps they can go to, everything they read, etc. And that's where the substance ended. Just got nasty after that because that hit close to home. And the sad thing is that she doesn't discipline our children, at all. She just yells at them. And then yells at them louder when they don't listen. My parents never yelled at me. They didn't have to. I don't yell at our children. I don't have to. I enjoy being with our children. They are always well behaved around me. Went camping with 9 and 4 year old. The two of them are always fighting when they're around wife of. I come back after 3 days camping with them and we had a blast. Not once did they fight or argue. They were a pure joy and it was a lot of fun. Come home and wife of was like "So how did it go". I told her. She was amazed. I wasn't. She gives them zero discipline, yet controls their every move and action (through yelling). I discipline them, but then I also give them FAR more freedom.

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Wife wants to 'talk' when i get home

Re: Wife wants to 'talk' when i get home

I would be perfectly fine if you responded to every

I really did***

I done TELT you it was Shakira day

zima is back***

What have you done wrong this week?

Also...

Guesses go here about what it is

Those are logical choices, but I'm betting that she wants to

For this?

It's 3***

Re: Guesses go here about what it is

I don't have kids, but that seems ridiculous

There's no winning that argument.

Re: I don't have kids, but that seems ridiculous

Just explain to her that you work to put a roof over their

You aren’t being a #### but...

^^^this logic is the only way to

9 WHOLE HOURS?

Pro Tip - This is an "unwinnable" argument. When she is

^^^ Voice of experience ^^^***

hahaha its funny

7***

#### you

Other than the sleepless nights when she goes back to work,

And eventually, the baby gets to be a teenager and ends up

She'll probably end up fleeing to Iraq and join ISIS***

7 more years!!!!!!!!!!!!***

that's just hormones talking

Re: that's just hormones talking

like greenr said

and at our house, it was WAY harder the second time around.***

Third time gets harder. Basically with the first you can

What's the big deal?

Well, my experience is it doesn't make a difference

Could be spending too much time at work

Oh god no..

normally

ALL of them, right?***

It's like

I guess it's because he's not holding the baby enough***

Chin up, bruh. She is probably just super horny and wants

lol marriage***

Am I still in the honeymoon phase?

I read an article that talked about segs, suggesting

Yeah. That's BS. They interviewed a bunch of wives.***

stay on the sunny side of life, I always say.

Re: stay on the sunny side of life, I always say.

That's probably EXACTLY what it is..***

you spend a lot of time thinking about playing games

It's not a game.

Dude, you obviously ain't married to my wife.

Well no, cause that would be illegal.

Does arguing involve shouting?

God, yes. She's Italian***

Does she have a unibrow?

Dude, that's nasty

Make it go away***

Re: Make it go away***

He's hideous***

About 50/50 here...so that's about twice a year

I leave shid unsaid frequently

This is manipulative AF. Not bad, not good.***

Because that's what she's doing.

Never listen to this guy's relationship advice***

texting wife

Text back "Do you want a mustache

Def get a few mini bottles and down then on the way home.

Make sure you are completely 7Spots

texting about letter

Re: texting about letter

Everytime I hear upper management at work say things like

Danm right***

read the whole thing so you don't end up like this

Friends is kind of like the millenials version of

Don't forget to post letter in Junge tonight

"...time to react and respond back..."

She's asking for help around house and with kid