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YOUR BALANCE
Myrtle Beach of the skies
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Myrtle Beach of the skies


Apr 12, 2021, 10:34 AM

To expand on the GMHWYW thread to sooth clemsonrulez08®

Don't go to Gaitlinburg.

It's like Myrtle Beach without the water.

I have NEVER seen so many leg tattoos in my life.

It's $20 to park unless you want to walk 5 blocks to get to the main run.

Yankees from every corner of Ohio who want something different than the beach is there.

Everything shuts down at 7pm. So if you get hungry after that, tough luck. Pay $20 to go get a $15 pizza from Mellow Mushroom and not see MauldinT®

You can always go to Smith's corner kitchen and pay $4 an ounce for bourbon.

Then you can walk across the street to the chair lift that takes you to the suspension bridge that is way too ####### high and rocky.

Only good thing about Gaitlinburg is Sugarland Distillery. Great tasting and great atmosphere. I'm a big fan of Moonshiners and they have all of their signature spirits from the guys on the show.

A lot of it is over sweetened for Yankees who mix their whiskey with ice. Jim Tom's rye whiskey actually tastes like moonshine is suppose to.

Their sour mash is like an angry woman. It will sneak up on you and knock you over the head without you knowing what just happened.

On the last day we went to Newport Tn where Mark and Digger from the show are. Digger has a store in the back of his wife's boutique shop where he sells grain and home fermentation stuff. He had a still set up that he was working on as a prototype for what he wants to mass produce. I ended up buying it off of him.

He's a great guy. Acts the same as he does on the show. Tried to get me out of paying taxes on the still but got fussed at by his manager.

Anyways. Don't go to Gaitlinburg.

2024 white level memberbadge-donor-05yr.jpg flag link military_tech thumb_downthumb_up

I like your funny words magic man


I went to Gatlinburg once.


Apr 12, 2021, 10:37 AM

It was mid-July. The air was hot and my throat was dry, so I thought I'd stop and have myself a brew.

I don't even have the words to describe what happened after that.

2024 white level memberbadge-donor-15yr.jpgbadge-ringofhonor-19b.jpg flag link military_tech thumb_downthumb_up

Perhaps you could explain in gif form?***


Apr 12, 2021, 10:39 AM



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Sure.


Apr 12, 2021, 10:45 AM













2024 white level memberbadge-donor-15yr.jpgbadge-ringofhonor-19b.jpg flag link military_tech thumb_downthumb_up

Me trying to get scoks to dole out the upvotes


Apr 12, 2021, 10:48 AM



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Re: Sure.


Apr 12, 2021, 10:48 AM [ in reply to Sure. ]



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HAVE YOU NOT BEEN LISTENING TO ME FOR ALL THESE YEARS?


Apr 12, 2021, 10:38 AM

I've been constantly saying it's the Myrtle beach of the mountains. #### they even got a Ripley's believe it or not there.

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So you made another reservation for next summer?***


Apr 12, 2021, 10:38 AM



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So you basically took your family


Apr 12, 2021, 10:41 AM

to see Moonshiner Guys that really do not make real moonshine and then got drunk and complained on Snapchat.

I think I summed it up.

2024 orange level memberbadge-donor-05yr.jpg flag link military_tech thumb_downthumb_up


You put down a deposit


Apr 12, 2021, 10:43 AM

on a time share.

DIDN'T YOU?

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It sounds like you did dumb stuff rather than


Apr 12, 2021, 10:45 AM

the stuff I told you to do. I've also hear the Cherokee casino is fuggin' packed these days and more trouble than it is worth.

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Holdup - you bought a still?***


Apr 12, 2021, 10:48 AM



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Got to get distilled water for my CPap somehow***


Apr 12, 2021, 10:50 AM



2024 white level memberbadge-donor-05yr.jpg flag link military_tech thumb_downthumb_up

I like your funny words magic man


Next week's installment will be FBcooch going on disability


Apr 12, 2021, 10:51 AM [ in reply to Holdup - you bought a still?*** ]

because he went blind from the head of the first batch of moonshine he made with old potatoes and orange peels.

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I thought everyone in his county automatically got checks


Apr 12, 2021, 10:59 AM

sent out anyways, no matter what.

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Somehow, I wasn't shocked at this


Apr 12, 2021, 11:24 AM [ in reply to Holdup - you bought a still?*** ]

This was on the list of things I anticipated. What I wasn't anticipating is that FBCoachSC® would get Uber Eats delivery... and then end up going and getting the food himself.

badge-donor-05yr.jpgringofhonor-clemsonrulez08.jpg flag link military_tech thumb_downthumb_up

Please forgive me, @IneligibleUser


I want to burn that Japanese restaurant to the ground***


Apr 12, 2021, 11:28 AM



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I like your funny words magic man


So what happened?


Apr 12, 2021, 11:32 AM

Never saw an update after you said, "we ordered Uber Eats" and then saw you at a gas station like 5 minutes later.

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Please forgive me, @IneligibleUser


Ordered at 6:30


Apr 12, 2021, 11:42 AM

left to go get beer.

At 8:30 they changed the delivery time to 9:30. I called the delivery driver. He said he has no idea how long it's going to take him but to expect him before 10.

I called the store and asked why it was taking 3.5 hours to make the food and deliver it.

The dude laughed, hung up, and canceled our order on the app.

Apparently the reviews on grubhub and on google were different. On grubhub they were pretty good. On google they were awful.

Since they canceled our order we couldn't leave them a review

2024 white level memberbadge-donor-05yr.jpg flag link military_tech thumb_downthumb_up

I like your funny words magic man


Your writing style is terrible


Apr 12, 2021, 11:23 AM

Why is every single thought a new line?

badge-donor-05yr.jpgringofhonor-clemsonrulez08.jpg flag link military_tech thumb_downthumb_up

Please forgive me, @IneligibleUser


We tried to warn you.


Apr 12, 2021, 12:12 PM

;)

The nuanced difference between good old boy and redneck is not so nuanced anymore. Gatlinburg, MYB, and Ohio and upstate NY are all the proof you need.

And I agree, best part is doing a tasting at Sugarlands. Left there with a nice free buzz. They have a Peddler steakhouse also, which was awesome. But overall, not a taker. Oh, and cheap cabins, with all the se....couple accessories. Pool table and hot tub standard. Other than a couples retreat for a conjugal weekend in seclusion with some decent restaurants nearby, the touristy parts are pointless.

And if you didn't stop at a local pancake house, you escaped with too high an impression.

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