Oculus Spirit [78876]
TigerPulse: 100%
Posts: 78623
Joined: 8/2/03
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Guys Brunch
1
Mar 12, 2021, 1:23 PM
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Lookin' for a 100% for real bros to share/experience brunching in all its glory. This is for real, I don't want to waste my time or yours. 100% JO and heavy hors d'oeuvres, no sugar added. I AM NOT GAY. Don't even think this is a sex thing, it's all about brunching.
Looking for bros to head onto the patio and bond by tasteful landscaping, experience life as men once lived it, sun circle, and bottomless Mimosas/Bloody Marys.
THIS IS NOT A SEX THING.
Gonna need some basic things/skills, I don't want to be slowed down by fools:
- must be in reasonable shape, if you get winded dancing then stay home
- Vineyard Vines pastel polo shirts, they're really quality shirts and they're awesome
- desire to be a man among men
- not afraid to eat some turkey bacon
- crystal, I'm not sharing mine
- must be able to sing the lyrics to Jessica Simpson's "A Public Affair." WELL.
- boat shoes
- a knowledge of landscape perennials (plant grouping and themes a plus)
- knowledge of 2000's pop music
- protective/splash resistant eye wear
- some sort of complementary side or garnish
We are gonna need a mobile music device, ipod or something. I'm bringing the music for the dancing and sun circles, Cher's Believe. I only have it on CD, so I'll have my discman as a last resort, an ipod would be nicer. Just sayin'.
Don't want to see:
- bad attitudes
- gay/homoerotic behavior, this is a GUY'S BRUNCH thing. I AM NOT GAY.
- cack rings, can't keep it up w/o help, you aren't gonna make it on this brunch
- capri pants, we're here to brunch and get some sun on our thighs, not cover up.
- the nerds/dorks/lames/and anyone less than 100% into brunching.
If you are serious, then I promise you this will be the late morning to early afternoon of your life. It will change the way you think. I'm serious, and I AM NOT GAY. To see a group of bros being men, a sun circle by a water feature. The charge/energy in the air. Crystals get jacked, no lie. You will slip into a different frame of mind, you will feel electric.
Last guy's brunch, we had a group that was so charged we attracted a group of slightly overweight late 30's average looking women. It was no deal, nature knew man was brunching, the crystals gave us the confidence to own those hags. I saw it, I was there.
100% SERIOUS, NO FAKERS
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