Replies: 35
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Oculus Spirit [81049]
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I got woken up this morning by two raccoons playing on the
Mar 16, 2021, 12:15 PM
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roof. Sounded like they were running laps up there. Aside from shooting them (and unintentionally at the McMansions on 2 sides), what's the best way to get rid of them?
I gotta admit that when I shined a light on them it was kinda funny they both stopped in their tracks and looked at me like "Oh ####...he caught us!"
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All-In [46816]
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renting a house with an insulated attic will help
Mar 16, 2021, 12:15 PM
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with the noise
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Oculus Spirit [81049]
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It must be pretty well insulated as the power bills have
Mar 16, 2021, 12:18 PM
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been pretty cheap.
If the owner sells me the place, I'm going to replace that roof with a metal one and foam insulate it though.
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Heisman Winner [135569]
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Why didn't you invite them inside where they belong?
Mar 16, 2021, 12:38 PM
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-- FBCoachSC®
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All-In [47750]
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All-In [42866]
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If you start dumping all your trash on your neighbor's lawn
Mar 16, 2021, 12:18 PM
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that should attract them away from your house.
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Oculus Spirit [81049]
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I've wondered why they picked this place to hang out
Mar 16, 2021, 7:35 AM
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They must just laugh at my fierce dogs.
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All-TigerNet [11252]
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Re: I got woken up this morning by two raccoons playing on the
Mar 16, 2021, 12:20 PM
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The natural enemy of raccoons is, uh, coyotes...yeah that's what you need, coyotes. Or, maybe a Golden Eagle. That might scare the chit out of them. Then, there's always traps, with peanut butter.
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Oculus Spirit [79195]
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Bears should get rid of them. Get a cub away from its
Mar 16, 2021, 12:21 PM
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mother and throw it up there. If that don't work try releasing a bunch of bees
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Oculus Spirit [81049]
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How about some snakes, or rats?***
Mar 16, 2021, 12:57 PM
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Oculus Spirit [79195]
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Rats are too small. Snakes don't have arms***
Mar 16, 2021, 1:11 PM
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All-In [43656]
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Can't speak for everyone else
Mar 16, 2021, 12:22 PM
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but I'm pretty sure I'd burn the house down.
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All-TigerNet [13764]
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Maybe a wolverine? Or a kamado dragon?***
Mar 16, 2021, 12:24 PM
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Oculus Spirit [97704]
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Oculus Spirit [78876]
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Racoons won't play on the roof if the house is on fire.
Mar 16, 2021, 12:29 PM
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EddieMurphyTappingHead.gif
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All-In [46816]
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Not all black people is Eddie Murphy***
Mar 16, 2021, 12:33 PM
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Oculus Spirit [78876]
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Martin Lawrence?***
Mar 16, 2021, 12:37 PM
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Heisman Winner [105525]
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Man, it's Taye Diggs.***
Mar 16, 2021, 12:49 PM
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All-TigerNet [13764]
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I thought it was Gary Coleman.***
Mar 16, 2021, 12:53 PM
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Oculus Spirit [78876]
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Oculus Spirit [79195]
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That was Lawrence Fishburn***
Mar 16, 2021, 12:55 PM
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Oculus Spirit [78876]
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Re: That was Lawrence Fishburn***
Mar 16, 2021, 12:57 PM
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There's a passage that I got memorized, seems appropiate for this situation: Ezekiel 25,17. "The path of the righteous man is beset of all sides by the iniquities of the selfish and the tyranny of evil me. Blessed is he who, in the name of the charity and good will, shepherds the weak through the valley of darkness, for he is truly his brother's keeper and the finder of lost children. And I will strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger those who attempt to poison and destroy my brothers. And you will know my name is the Lord when I lay my vengeance upon thee.
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Heisman Winner [105525]
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YES
Mar 16, 2021, 12:59 PM
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Oculus Spirit [79195]
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Oculus Spirit [79195]
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Are you sure they weren't ######?
Mar 16, 2021, 12:33 PM
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Maybe you could lure them down with seggs. Try furiously fapping in your front yard and see if they take the bate.
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Oculus Spirit [78876]
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Racoons are notorious for how prudish they can be.
Mar 16, 2021, 12:39 PM
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He should go up on the roof with his pants off and just start j-ing the O and deep dinking himself with a broom handle until they go away.
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All-In [43656]
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YOU GUIZE. Bengaline gone be veerrrrry disappointed
Mar 16, 2021, 12:40 PM
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this suggestion does not include a photo of Tiger Woods with his shirt off.
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Oculus Spirit [79195]
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Well he needs to bone up before trying it so I kinda thought
Mar 16, 2021, 12:47 PM
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it was implied.
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All-In [47770]
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Best get rid of them
Mar 16, 2021, 12:34 PM
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Those little fuggers will tear right through the shingles. Of course, I suppose you are renting and don't give a shid, but landlord might.
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Oculus Spirit [81049]
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I just sent the landlord an email
Mar 16, 2021, 1:01 PM
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asking him if he wanted to cover getting rid of them or if I'm supposed to. I mentioned the shingles and getting in the attic thing as well. I've seen the damage those effers can do too a house in short time. And yeah, I care because I like the place..and am trying to buy it from my landlord.
I called a raccoon exterminatin' guy and he said he'll put two cages out for $250/ea and $55/"critter" he catches. He said one guy over here hated them so bad he took the cage with a raccoon in it and just through it off his dock.
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All-TigerNet [10856]
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Re: I just sent the landlord an email
Mar 16, 2021, 1:11 PM
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He'll reply asking you for a pet deposit.
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Oculus Spirit [81049]
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He's actually a pretty good dude.
Mar 16, 2021, 1:13 PM
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He sent us a Christmas card for being such good tenants . I've put up some ceiling fans, planted a mailbox, painted some stuff, taken good care of the place.
I've been schmoozing him to sell us the place...dunno if its going to work or not.
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Oculus Spirit [78876]
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Sounds like you're a good "rent to own" candidate when
Mar 16, 2021, 1:17 PM
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FBCoachSC®'s current prospect falls through.
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All-TigerNet [11252]
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Re: He's actually a pretty good dude.
Mar 16, 2021, 1:27 PM
[ in reply to He's actually a pretty good dude. ] |
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So, how much did he raise the rent after all that purtyfying you did?
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Oculus Spirit [81049]
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None.
Mar 16, 2021, 1:35 PM
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Our lease is up the end of Oct, but we have a 6 month ext if we want it at the same price. I've gotten sick of looking at houses only to be outbid for more than asking, so I think after we sign on for the next 6 months, I might request another 9 months or a even year and see if he ups the rent then.
I doubt I could afford to buy this place even if he decided to sell it. It wouldn't be any cheaper than the rent is, that's for sure.
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Oculus Spirit [81049]
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Replies: 35
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