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All-TigerNet [11305]
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I GD Mo hate Alzheimer's disease.
Jul 20, 2012, 11:47 PM
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No amount of my pissedoffery, anger, or sadness will help my father in law. He's just gone. My sons will not remember him fondly, they'll only remember that he smelled and was a general pain in the ###. They won't remember the good man that used to be there. Eff this mother effin' disease. I'm not a person to hate, but hate this disease.
Old man's goin' to the nursing home at 69 yrs of age. Early on set Alzheimer's, diagnosed when he was 55. Years ago, I thought I'd be happy when the burden was lifted, but I can now only see a shell of a good man and the complete and utter devastation it's left in my family. I hate this, I hate it all.
I only hope, when my sons grow older, they can see it as parents that did a good thing by taking care of family and not see it as a childhood that lost too much innocence. Maybe it will help make them better men, forgiving men, men that know the value of family and love. I hate the ^^^^ out of this and right now I feel like I wasted 10 years of my family's life.
The anger will fade, I will be with my wife and try to comfort her. And I hope when I die, my God will say, "It's OK, you did the best you could. Everybody is OK, now."
Sorry, rant over...just pissed.
Message was edited by: Crump®
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Heisman Winner [137844]
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Been right there with you man
Jul 21, 2012, 12:12 AM
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I can tell you that you have taught your boys how to take care of their own just as my parents did for me when my grandmother had this vicious disease while I was in high school.
This past February my father's body died but the man had been gone for a long time. I followed his example with his mother.
You have not wasted that 10 years - you have grown together as a family. When your kids are older get out the pictures and tell stories so they will know who their grandfather was.
You are lucky - my wife and I don't have kids so who knows who will look after us in our dotage.
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Orange Blooded [4367]
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Grandmother has Dementia (not sure of exact type)
Jul 21, 2012, 12:50 AM
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My grandfather hid it from the family till he died about 10 years ago, we were all surprised how far she had lapsed without us knowing it, my Grandfather was a great man for taking care of her so well. There was a point in time where we were grateful she was getting worse memory wise because she had become so confused the nursing staff at her nursing home threatened to kick her out because she was threatening people to escape, and the more of a shell she became, the less 'energetic' episodes she had. Now we have an old woman that doesn't know who any of us are and seems to be in an almost vegetative state except for brief stretches where she appears to be living in the 30's.
Horrible disease. She had breast cancer shortly before my grandfather died and was cured, sometimes I wonder if once I get that old I'll treat something like that, because I know as sure as h3ll I don't wanna live so long that my mind completely fails on me.
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Orange Blooded [3635]
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Dealing with it myself
Jul 21, 2012, 8:11 AM
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My dad has it and for the longest time, he fought it back. The last six months he has fallen considerably. I catch myself trying to reason with him, but then realize it is useless. The man I once KNEW could do anything, can now do almost nothing. Terrible diease!
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110%er [9107]
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It's one of the most devastating diseases out there.
Jul 21, 2012, 9:33 AM
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Sorry man, that situation sucks.
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Hall of Famer [23693]
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Been there. Right there with you.***
Jul 21, 2012, 10:21 AM
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Orange Blooded [3592]
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I'm right there with you as well
Jul 21, 2012, 10:42 AM
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I'm not sure what's more frustrating; the fact that it is what it is and it's only going to get worse, or that everyone else in my family offers little to no help. Pretty much in this alone. I feel like I'm losing my mind as quickly as she is.
It sucks
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All-TigerNet [10193]
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Re: I'm right there with you as well
Jul 22, 2012, 9:05 AM
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Yep, I was the primary care giver and I could not get my brother to do squat. Now that it is time to settle the estate, my brother, is becoming a non-brother. I'm not sure if we will remain distant or patch it up one day. Every time I asked for help, he had something else to do. I don't regret for one minute taking care of my dad, I do regret my brother trying to be executor of the estate just for the obvious gain.
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Know-it-all [2692]
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My Grandmother-in-law is starting to get dementia caused
Jul 21, 2012, 12:41 PM
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by ongoing vascular issues. We're just beginning what will probably be a similar journey, and I can tell you in the six or so months since it became apparent that there was a problem, things haven't been easy throughout the entire family.
Anything that robs a person of their self is horrible.
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Orange Blooded [4521]
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I feel your pain...my FIL is battling it
Jul 21, 2012, 1:34 PM
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One of his bros has already died from it. His other bro doesn't know where he is (in a home), and his sis is battling, too. Alzheimer's is so prevalent in my wife's family, Duke included them in a study. We're glad he's still "with" us, but he's 83 and there is evidence that his mental faculties are being "constricted".
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CU Medallion [68737]
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Re: I GD Mother effin' hate Alzheimer's disease. I wish
Jul 21, 2012, 3:30 PM
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they could figure out what causes this and eliminate it or stop its progress. I just dont know why but it seems like each year we find more and more people who have it
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CU Guru [1065]
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Praying for ya'll.
Jul 21, 2012, 4:53 PM
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Go Tigers.
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Rock Defender [54]
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I hope, if I am ever disgnosed with that disease, I am able
Jul 21, 2012, 11:43 PM
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to take myself out.
It would be a long boat ride..and they'd find my boat..empty, probably still running...on the way to Bermuda.
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All-TigerNet [12344]
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I cant think of a tougher journey for a family to have to
Jul 22, 2012, 1:09 AM
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endure. My Mother had it and passed away in 1998. To watch my Father faithfully take care, and gradually lose his wife of 50+ years. Also, to have my own Mother, with time , forget who I was, was an extremely painful time! Ask God for guidance, wisdom, and patience during this journey, and He will lead you through!!
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All-TigerNet [10193]
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Reading your message brings tears to my eyes. In fact
Jul 22, 2012, 8:57 AM
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I broke down and had to walk away for a few minutes.
I agree with you Old Slac Tiger, few things are more devastating and unkind than dementia and alzheimer's. I am very sorry to hear about your father in law.
Your post is very fresh in my soul because my father's funeral was on the 11th. Though those diseases were just starting to invade my dad, nonetheless it was a horrible impact. My 5 year old didn't get to know the man my dad really was. Regretfully, my son will remember how my dad was in his last months of his life.
Again, I'm very sorry to here about that!
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All-In [34823]
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I am concerned about the long-term memory losses
Jul 22, 2012, 7:22 PM
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experienced by my mother since her stroke a few weeks ago. We have a neurologist's appointment this week, and I am going to ask him some pointed questions.
My father contracted it in his late 60's or very early 70's, and Aricept helped a lot. He was slipping quickly at the end, though, and we were spared the hell that you are going through. Prayers for a merciful conclusion to this for you.
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All-TigerNet [11963]
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Just had lunch with a coworker. He told me his wife was
Jul 23, 2012, 2:28 PM
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just diagnosed with it. She's in her early 50s. They have a college aged son. I can't even imagine what that must be like. My dad started showing signs when he was in his mid-60's and I thought that was unfair.
It indeed is awful, awful disease.
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All-TigerNet [12270]
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take comfort in the fact that your family did what you had
Jul 23, 2012, 3:41 PM
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to do with the hand that was delt and keep trusting your childern will understand that.
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110%er [6800]
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Re: I GD Mo hate Alzheimer's disease.
Jul 23, 2012, 4:06 PM
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I have been in your situation. No one is exactly sure what the patient is feeling or experiencing, but every family member knows the feelings of frustration and utter helplessness. The most sweet and terrible moments were the very brief moments of clarity and recognition followed by your optimism and hope being dashed when he would return to "his world". My wifes father was in a nursing home because of this for seven years before he passed away. My prayers for you and your loved ones.
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